Falling Into a Good Book
by SinfullySilent
Summary: Lexi, who has just lost everything without a moment's notice, wishes to be inside one of her new books, it could never really happen anyways, right? Wrong. Falling into a story, Lexi lands in Nora Grey's place, leaving no recollection of Nora to the other characters. What will happen? Will she find love and a place to belong, or will she be left, yet again, with nothing? *Complete*
1. Chapter 1

I started reading when I was young; it became a defense mechanism for me. I had lost both of my parents in a car crash when I was about ten and had floated through various foster homes since then. Opening a book was a good way to escape. The world and all traces of life stopped, either that or it seemed to float around me, leaving me in a timeless standstill. I could be anywhere I wanted, could be whoever I wanted, from a heroine in the middle of a war, to a princess locked in a faraway castle. The person to get me started in reading was my first foster brother, Kevin. He was five years older than me, but he was the only other kid in the house to acknowledge my presence in a positive way. He took on the role of an older brother, lending me books, teaching me his favorite quotes, and reading me to sleep most nights when our foster parents would argue so loudly sleep seemed impossible. I was devastated when he had gotten adopted after only my sixth month there, but was happy he'd finally be able to have the family he'd always wanted. He left all of his books to me and told me I'd have nothing to worry about. He said I'd get adopted soon enough, but in the meantime, to stick with books.

"You're a good kid, Lexi; you'll find somewhere to belong soon enough. Until then, stick it out, everything will be fine, and if anything gets bad, pick up a book and let yourself slip into another world."

I let myself cry for him that night, something I hadn't done in a long time as a result of getting teased by the other children. I missed him, but no one in the house even seemed to notice. The next year was so hard, I took up his space at the dinner table, went to sleep in his bed, and soon there was another adoption, another kid going to live a better, happier life. All the while, I read. First, I read the books he gave me, most of them were his old school books. Kevin really loved reading, but even he would groan and complain about having to read some of the classics. Not me, I'd read anything and everything. Soon, I had even convinced my foster parents to take me to the library every other week, and I had my own library card. I didn't care if I was reading Charles Dickens' novels or books found in the children's section. After time, I moved to a different foster home, which was sad, but my original foster parents couldn't take the stress. Their marriage was hanging on by a string and they knew it wasn't a good environment for the rest of us to be in.

I moved like this several times, meeting and living with new people, leaving them eventually. It was a tough life lesson, but I learned from the start that no one sticks around for long. I eventually stopped talking to the people I lived with, even the people I went to school with, there was no point. In another month, or maybe if I was lucky, a couple years, I'd move on and someone new would promise to take care of me. The only things there for me consistently when I needed them were books.

When I finally reached high school, after having been in four or five different homes since my parents' accident, I was branded a loser, a loner, someone that wasn't even worth the time of day to pick on anymore. I was fine with that, I only cared about my books, my studies, and I prayed that by the time I reached eighteen, I would have a full ride to a college of my choice and could start to live life the way I'd like to. I could settle down, have a career, maybe even make some friends or, highly unlikely in my mind, a boyfriend.

It was the start of my senior year that I started to feel more stable in my surroundings. I had been with the same family for over 3 years now, had gone to the same school, and had the same routine. I lived with Sally and Patrick, a lovely couple, with four foster siblings: John, Tom, Kate, and Brad. They were all several years younger than me, so I had more responsibility at home, which I enjoyed. I liked the feel of taking my life into my own hands for once, and Sally treated me as an equal, I never felt looked down on. It was the best home I had been in and I was even starting to feel like I fit in.

It was a Monday afternoon in September that changed that. I knew immediately something was wrong, knew I needed to escape. I knew life was never going to be the same for me.

I unlocked the door to my house with the key Patrick had gifted me a little over three years ago. _My house_, it was a funny thought, but a welcomed one. I walked straight into the kitchen, getting ready to make some hot chocolate. It may have been September, but Maine was cold all year, with a brief warming stint in June until mid-August. The house was oddly quiet, reminding me of the calm before a storm.

"Sally?" I called out. No reply.

I put down the mug I had been pulling out of a cabinet and silently moved to my room. I had a feeling something was off. I made it to my room, and it looked untouched, I glanced around. Even the new library books I had checked out the day before were sitting neatly stacked on my desk. _Moving on_, I thought to myself.

I made my way to John and Tom's room next, the two were twins just under two years of age, and they could be quite a handful at times. I did a double take as soon as I had reached their room. At first glance, it looked as it would on any given day, but looking deeper there was more. The closet, half opened in the back of the room, was empty; the changing table next to the cribs was bare. I ran to the next room, which was shared by Kate and Brad. They were around the same age; both in junior high, but Sally had talked Patrick into putting up a wall divider in the middle of the room, to give them their privacy. Kate's side I saw first, she had a lonely sweater in the corner, but other than that, her usually messy room was unusually tidy. Pulling open Brad's closet gave me the same evidence I had been unwilling to accept. There was no one here, and almost no trace of where they'd gone. My breathing had slowed, and I couldn't believe this. It had to be a bad dream. I darted to Sally and Patrick's room, and it was identical to the other rooms. There was a bed, dressers, but no sign of life. No personal objects, no clothes, nothing that tied them here. I let out a cry and stormed to my room. There were no signs of foul play, there wasn't a note anywhere, and the kitchen was completely stocked. I grabbed my cell phone out of my pocket and looked up the number for the police station. I didn't think it was a time for 911. They left, and the police could handle it. They answered on the third ring and I was told to hold. By the time the operator got back to me I was near tears. _Left again, big surprise_, I thought to myself. Just as I was comfortable, something changed. I told the police everything I knew, and hung up.

After walking back to my room, I snatched a library book off of my desk, and retreated to my bed. Hush, Hush the cover read. At that point I didn't care what book it was, I just wanted to leave reality and get caught up in someone else's life. I made it halfway through the first chapter, and somehow reading about Nora Grey's life made me feel just a teeny bit better. The police said they were going to be twenty minutes when I had called, so I figured I had a good ten to fifteen minutes until they arrived. As much as I loved reading, I shut my eyes. There isn't much I remember about my parents, but I do remember them telling me anytime I felt scared to just close my eyes, and it would shut the world out. I hadn't used their advice in a long time, but it felt appropriate in the moment. Where could my foster family have gone? My eyes stayed closed for a while, and soon I felt a strange calm. I floated between conscious and unconscious, all the while waiting for police sirens or knocks on the door. They never came, and the next thing I knew, I was in a deep sleep. I don't remember much about those minutes before falling asleep, but I do remember thinking, no praying,_ I wish my life was like a book, any book, even this book! _

I woke up in a heap. It took several minutes for reality to hit me as I refused to open my eyes. I didn't want to go back, not yet. I was having a lovely dream about my parents. My biological parents, with me, hunched over me, with a look of love and worry on their face. My mom stroked my cheek tenderly and my dad held my right hand, a tear rolling down his face. I couldn't remember much about the dream, like where, when, or why we had been there, but it was nice. I felt cared for and appreciated. I groaned as my head started to throb, I was also feeling cold. _I hope I'm not getting sick_, I thought, _that would be a cherry on the cake for today_. I finally opened my eyes expecting to see policemen standing around me, or even my foster family jumping out and saying "Surprise! We got you!", but I didn't. I saw something else entirely. I surveyed the room, _I've never seen this before_, I thought. It was a girl's room, neat and tidy, with school books on the desk. It reminded me of my room, but something was off. A bulletin board with pictures attached hung off to the side near an open window in the room. I got off the bed slowly as my head was starting to hurt worse. I gasped in shock as I approached a certain photo; it was of another girl and her friend. One was average height, but very pretty with red hair, and the other was just as pretty with a full figure, long legs, and her hair was pulled up high. Gradually, the picture began to transform before my very eyes. The girl with the full figure stayed the same, but the girl whose arm was around her was different. She was me. I didn't know how it was possible and I didn't know what to think, other than I had never seen that girl before in my life. It couldn't be me, and it wasn't before… I took a step back and took another look around the room.

"The desk," I said aloud, "it should have something with a name on it." I started shuffling through the books when I found what I was looking for. A paper from what looked to be a biology class. The date in the corner said April though, and it was not my handwriting. The handwriting was neat and feminine, the complete opposite as I happened to have. _If it is April_, I thought, _that would explain the chill_. At the top of the paper in black ink, was a sign something was very wrong. At first I didn't realize where I had known the name when it hit me. Slowly, just as the picture had, the name changed to read "Lexi Thomas". I gulped down a bit of bile that had crept up my throat. Before the name changed it belonged to a familiar person. Character actually. The name on the paper had read "Nora Grey."

I shrieked, and I wasn't a person who usually vocalized my emotions. What was going on? Was I turning into her, no, she was turning into me. All of the evidence she had been here before was gone. Everything pointed back to me now. As if I had just won the role of the heroine in this novel. But it wasn't a novel; it was my life, wasn't it?

I pulled out my phone from my pocket. It looked the same, but after inspecting the contacts I realized I didn't know anyone. I recognized some names from when I had started reading the book, but I hadn't gotten that far into it. It was obvious that a man named 'Patch' was going to be the male protagonist and a woman named 'Vee' was going to be a sidekick of sorts in this journey.

"Are you serious?!" I said to myself. I pinched my leg hard, but other than a sharp ache that was now on my thigh, nothing had changed. I couldn't believe I was actually considering this, but it looked as if I had no other choice. There was no way to contact anyone, and even if I could, who would I call?

"Lexi! Your mom is on the phone! Would you come downstairs to take it?" a voice called up to me.

"Wh- What?" I called back, confused, realizing I was not alone in the house.

"Your mom is on the phone, she finally got a break at the auction and would like to speak to you!" the woman's voice replied.

"Okay." I said and walked out of the bedroom, examining everything on my way downstairs. I saw a bathroom to my left that didn't look out of the ordinary and pictures all across the walls. _That must be my 'mom'_, I thought as I looked at a picture with me and a woman. There were some other pictures with what I guessed was my 'dad', my mom, and I all together.

I finally reached the downstairs area, feeling a little wobbly, and out of sorts. The plump woman turned to me, "Hello Lexi. Your mother," she handed the phone to me.

"Uh…Hi?" I questioned more than spoke, into the phone.

"LEXI! Oh, it is so nice to hear your voice! I should be home tomorrow, and then we can have dinner together, or maybe a big breakfast the next day." My pseudo-mother told me.

"Oh. And where are you again?" I needed to get my facts straight and soon.

"Honey, I'm at the auction. You know about my work! I hope you've started your homework, but I'll make sure to tell Dorothea to check up on you tonight anyways." She laughed, but I was unsure about what was so funny.

"Right," I said, "and Dorothea is the lady in the kitchen right now?"

"Yes. Why are you acting so weird Lexi? Vee isn't peer pressuring you into drugs or alcohol or anything like that, is she?" My mother sounded defensive. I took a quick, educated guess that she wasn't the biggest fan of this 'Vee'.

"No, no. Not at all. I just woke up with a headache, and it's messing with my brain." I joked, hoping she wouldn't notice anything was too off. "So when should I expect Dad back by?" I was referring to the man in the pictures I had seen with us.

"Lexi…." There was only silence on the other end, and I instantly knew I had said something wrong. "Lexi. That is not funny and I can only hope you were trying to make a joke. Do I need to take you to the doctor, or call your school psychiatrist to make sure everything is okay?"

"No, I'm sorry it was wrong. I know you don't like when I mention how he left us." I took a stab in the dark.

"Being murdered a year ago was not 'leaving us', Lexi Marie Thomas." She said dryly.

_Whoa, how did she know my middle name_, I thought.

"I know…mom, I'm sorry." I said remorsefully. I had no idea he had died, and was feeling pretty bad. This lady did think I was her daughter after all.

I told her a quick goodbye and "I love you" and took the stairs up to my room two-by-two. I laid down in the bed again thinking; _please go back to normal_, repeatedly until I drifted off to sleep. While I was asleep, my mind was collecting bursts of memory of this Nora's life. Only they were morphed into my own memories. I remembered my dad's (her dad's?) funeral; I remembered starting school, going out with Vee, I remembered almost everything. I woke with a start and looked around, it was the same room. It was Nora's room. _My room_, I thought begrudgingly. I hadn't always been a fan of my life before, but here I was, thrown into someone else's life without so much of a warning or knowledge of any of it. To make it worse, I had only made it a few pages into the book before winding up here, so I was lacking serious information on most of the characters, or people, in my new life. I did know two things though, I could trust Vee, and I could trust Patch. They were in it from the start, so they had to be good. It appeared to be nighttime outside, so I went back to bed and searched for a novel to read. I couldn't find any that could hold my interest in that moment, so I went back to sleep. As unhappy as I was about this whole ordeal, I was equally excited. It was a chance to start over, to do things right, and maybe, just maybe, I could belong somewhere. If only I could remember what the book was about.

I woke up with a start, the sun shining through my new window in my new room, as my new alarm went off. _I am going to have a good day_, I thought, _this is a fresh start_. I hopped out of bed and searched through my new wardrobe, it was seriously lacking. I grabbed a purple, long sleeve shirt, and a pair of skinny jeans, and rushed to the bathroom to wash up for school. I came out of the bathroom rejuvenated. I was actually excited about taking someone else's life. I raced downstairs and grabbed what I guessed was the key to my car (though using the word 'car' for the Spider was an overstatement). I opened the door, and started the ignition, the car taking awhile to actually start up, and I pulled out of the long drive way. _The book was right about the fog that's for sure_, I thought after assessing the farmhouse from the outside. I was pleasantly surprised to find that I knew exactly how to get to school, even though I had no clue how I'd known it. I pulled into the school parking lot looking at the castle exterior, it definitely did not look anything like a school, and my phone started to ring. I picked it out of my pocket and it the caller ID read "Vee". I answered it to the best of my ability.

"Hey girl" I said nervously.

"Hey Lex!" she practically squealed. I was taken aback by her enthusiasm.

"Where are you?" She asked

"Parking lot. You? I'll come find you." I wanted to stall for a little bit while I cleared my head.

"I'm already in class, I know, I'm early for once! But there's this cute guy who sits in the front and I want to try and snag a seat next to him…Crap. Marcie just sat down where I was planning too." She rambled on, a bit intensely.

"Marcie….?" I asked trying to register the name in my brain, seeing if it triggered anything. I felt anger, but I was unsure why.

"Yeah, Marcie Millar, the same girl who hung your bra up after gym a while ago, she put pudding in it, remember? Wrote whore on your locker for no reason? Ringing any bells?" She sounded annoyed.

"Of course. I was just shocked you shared similar tastes with her." I tried to cover up my fumble.

"Girl, you know she'd do anything that moves and is classified as 'male'." She laughed, "By the way, what do you think of your new seats in Biology. You left so quick after class yesterday.."

"New seats?" I remembered reading about this, I think, I was seated next to Patch. "Oh, you know I'm a go wherever the wind takes me kind of girl, he seems nice enough." That ought to satisfy her.

"NICE? Hot, maybe, but he's pretty dark in those clothes. Anyways, I hope we get to change back, I miss sitting next to my best friend." I could hear her drooling over him through the phone, maybe I was wrong and he was going to end up with her. Dark wasn't my type, but she seemed up for the challenge.

"Well, he's all yours if you'd like. I'll see you in Biology." I knew we'd shared that class together from the novel.

"Okay, later gator." She replied.

I put my phone away and headed up the stairs for my first class. I found my backpack in the car and after a long search, I found my locker number and combo, and found my class schedule. Looked like that Nora chick was pretty organized, thank goodness. I made it through all of my classes that morning and was dreading getting to Biology. Yes, I had been excited about the prospect of starting over, but what if people figured it out and knew I was someone else. I could be thrown in jail, or worse. I went nonetheless though, my curiosity getting the better of me.

"Seats class!" My biology teacher blurted out, I also heard I few people call him coach on the way in, so I was hoping if I needed to talk to him I could use that title for him.

I scrambled my way into my seat, not knowing where I sat but somehow my legs took me there. A minute later the door opened. 'Coach' was in midsentence. Something about reproduction, but it could wait. A man walked in the door, he looked my age, but only more so. I guessed he was my biology partner as all of the other tables were filled, but the seat next to me wasn't. _He must be Patch_, I thought. He strolled to his seat, not worried at all that he had been late. He looked at me with a bit of confusion, but then it went away. I was a bit upset, even if I didn't want to admit it, that he was going to end up with Vee. He was extremely attractive, the words beautiful and sexy coming to mind simultaneously, with the height of your average NBA player. He had black wavy hair, and dark eyes. Everything about him was just as Vee had put it, 'dark'.

I felt instantly comforted as he took his seat next to me, he was one of the two I knew I could trust. And, to be honest, he seemed a little less intense than Vee. I immediately liked Vee, but I can only take so much excitement in a day and she could use all of it up in an hour. I looked to my right and smiled at Patch. _What an odd name_, I thought, _but it looks as though it fits_. He didn't smile back, just scrutinized me further. I wish I could have known what he was thinking, but I'm sure he'd tell me later. After all, he was my only other friend. Wasn't he?

Coach had assigned us some bogus reading material during class, so I hadn't gotten much of a chance to talk to Patch. I needed more information about my life, and maybe, how to get out of here. I hadn't thought about it before, but maybe I should try to go back to my old life. And maybe Vee, or Patch, would know how. At least they might believe me. The bell rang to dismiss class, and everyone got up as quick as possible and left. Vee was waiting for me by the door, but I was stalling trying to find a way to talk to Patch. He hadn't spoken to me at all during class and I was sensing he wasn't feeling too friendly, but my needs outweighed whatever got his pants in a bunch.

"Hey, um, how was your last night?" I asked him, trying to put on my friendliest face. If he was with Vee, I didn't want to cross any lines.

"You're asking how my night was?" He had a trace of humor in his eyes, and his lips curled up slightly, but there definitely wasn't a smile on his face.

"Right, did you hang out with Vee? I'm sure it was great." I kept messing up whatever I was supposed to say.

"Vee? Why would I hang out with her?" He snapped with pure annoyance. So he wasn't in a good mood, and he clearly didn't appreciate Vee's company. Yikes.

"Sorry. I just…I don't know….I haven't been feeling well." I finally settled on an excuse.

He looked at me with interest and I felt hot all over. Maybe I was getting sick.

"I guess I'll see you later!" I called out to him, as I was walking out of the room. I felt humiliated enough as it was.

"Wait," he called back, "would you want to go to Bo's with me tonight"

Bo's… I said the word in my mind, but it only brought up a blank. I assumed it was the name of a friend who was throwing a party. A high school party I could deal with, and at least I could concentrate on getting information out of my peers.

"Sure," I spoke as he caught up with me, "But I forget where it is, so can your write down the address?" I asked him.

He gave a funny smile, "I'll just pick you up. Seven, okay?"

"Okay." And with that, I left with Vee. I guess he had been to my house before so maybe we were together, whatever it was, I'm sure Vee would know.

I walked into the hallway to find her with an aggravated look on her face. A look that said, _I've been waiting out here for so long, and now I'm going to be late to my next class_. I gave her an apologetic glance back, and tried to steer the conversation in my favor.

"So what are you up to tonight?" I asked her with pure sweetness, it was clear I had an agenda.

"I have a date with a box of donuts, Marcie totally snagged that guy I was telling you about. She didn't even have to speak, he just took one look and like that, he was a goner." She said solemnly. "What about you? Want to help me finish off a second box?"

"I can't, Patch and I are going to a party…" I waited cautiously to hear her response, if something was going on between her and Patch, I'd find out now.

"You, and Patch, going to a party?" She repeated.

"Yes", I squeaked. I was so nervous of getting caught. Again.

"Wow, I didn't think that would happen so fast. I told you he was hot yesterday, just be careful. And, why do I not get invited to these soirées?" She grinned. I was in the clear.

"I'm sure it will just be a fun, classy high school booze fest," I laughed, "and thank you. I will be careful."

I was so happy to finally have said something right, that we both walked the rest of the way in silence. School passed by slowly, I knew most things, and what I didn't know I caught on quick. I was surprised at how antsy I was about that night. But I told myself everything was going to be fine, I obviously knew the guy and trusted him. If not, I'd give him a good kick to the groin and that would secure his actions for the night.

It was six thirty at home and I was ready for the night to begin. I was going to dig to find out everything the people of Coldwater, Maine knew about me. After that, I'd see if there was a way I could reverse what happened.

At seven the doorbell rang, I knew it wasn't my 'mom' because she had called earlier to say she'd be an extra day. I ignored the giddy feeling inside and opened the door.

Patch was standing on the other side, looking casual and confident in his dark jeans, black shirt, and messy hair that stayed put in his baseball hat. His eyes looked like they were going to pop out of their sockets for a millisecond, but I still noticed. I regretted my outfit choice almost instantly. I wasn't sure how casual parties were in the…reality, so I tried my best to stay in the middle. I kept the skinny jeans from earlier, but under was a corset top lodged in the back of my closet with a jean jacket over it. Now I was sure I'd over done it.

"Too much?" I asked insecurely.

"I'm just afraid of what the people there might want to do to you. Trust me, I'm not going to let anyone else near you though" he said with a wink.

I stayed silent and let him lead me out to his motorcycle. I wasn't good on bikes, so seeing this was not a plus.

"Nice bike." I remarked quietly, knowing full well I would pass out mid-ride.

"Not too comfortable on a motorcycle?" he joked.

"No." I swallowed nervously.

"Oh. You'll be fine, trust me, nothing's going to happen under my watch unless I wanted it to." He assured me. Somehow, I wasn't comforted, and started to get nervous.

What if Patch wasn't trustworthy, what if he was the villain? What if I am mixed up with the wrong people? _I'm still at home and nothing has to happen_, I thought. Sensing my reaction, he grabbed my hand and dragged me toward him.

"We could always stay here if you prefer" he whispered. I shivered, and didn't want to think about whether it was because I feeling all hot again, or because I was scared of being alone with him in my house.

"No, let's go." I said more confidently. I could do with a bike ride, but I couldn't do with staying home alone with Patch without anyone knowing where I was.

I grabbed on tightly around his waist, and prayed for my life. I may have been in the right reality, but I still wanted to live. He thrust the bike into action, and off we went. It was the longest ride of my life, and I had been on a road trip before. I was questioning everything, from my allies to my enemies, to where we were going. We were about thirty minutes out and I knew we couldn't be going to a party of anyone we went to school with.

We pulled into a full lot, with cars and motorcycles alike, and I saw the big sign, **Bo's Arcade and Z's Pool Hall**. We were at a pool hall? I highly doubted Patch wanted to be in an arcade, but then again, this didn't look like an average Chuck E. Cheese. I nervously got off of the bike, and handed Patch my helmet. He took it and placed it under the seat, and came around to my side. I felt uneasy and I had no clue what was going to happen. He took me inside, after paying my cover charge, and we went to the right, we walked into **Z's**.

"I had no clue it was going to be so easy to get you to go out with me." Patch smirked. A cold shiver went down my spine.

"I'm always up for an adventure." I blurted, knowing full well, before this book trouble, I had never done anything exciting.

He smiled at me and took two cue sticks from the wall behind a pool table.

"You ever played before?" He asked.

"No." I lied. In truth, one of my foster father's had one in the basement when I was 12, but I couldn't say that. Not here.


	2. Chapter 2

I took the cue stick from his outstretched hand and tried to concentrate on looking like I had no clue what I was doing. I used to play with one of my old families, and boy did I play well. I had everyone beat at the age of 12, including my foster father at the time, Roger.

I bent over the pool table, "May I break?" I asked sweetly.

"Go for it." He replied coolly.

I drove my stick right into the green felt. Patch glanced at me, his expression was unreadable. I took a step back to let him take a turn, but he caught me by the wrist.

"Something's off." He declared.

I gulped nervously. I had no clue I'd be so easy to tell apart, but these people couldn't know, right? I had replaced Nora in every aspect of their minds; I even discovered a new birth scar on my wrist that morning that certainly hadn't been there before. So how could he tell?

"Off? I don't know what you mean." I argued, a bit too defensive.

"For one, I noticed that you just took your shot very carefully, aiming directly at the table, not a ball. And for two, I swear yesterday I couldn't have gotten you to come out with me if I had bribed you with money. Let's not forget that top either, I haven't seen you wear anything that revealing…ever." He looked me up and down, and I had never felt more naked. Everything I had done had been noticed. I was going about it wrong, but I still didn't understand his interest. Why would he care if I was good at pool, or dressed like I was? I resolved to put an end to his questions instead of divulging everything.

"To answer your speculations, one: if I could play pool, I doubt it'd matter. I was just trying to let you win, I know how guys get. Two: Maybe I was just looking for something to do tonight and you offered. And Three: I hate to offend your eyes, but it's laundry day. It was this or a bulky sweatshirt." So I had lied. It's been done before. I knew I didn't have to lie about number three, but standing there with his eyes on me, I felt had to make some excuse to cover up my apparent desperation.

"I never said I didn't like the outfit choice. Actually, I think it's rather tempting." He explained devilishly.

_Tempting? What a weird word choice_, I thought. No matter, I picked my pool stick back up and took a shot at the neatly arranged balls. I sunk two striped balls into the far holes and glanced up at Patch who continued looking at me like a predator more than a friend.

"Nice." He commented while picking up his own stick, "Guess I'm on the solid then?"

I nodded and we played the rest of the game in silence. He ended up beating me which he wasn't ashamed to brag about, but deep down, I knew he had a lot more practice than I had and I vowed to get better.

"Good game." I commended.

"Isn't this the part where you smack me on the butt?" he winked.

"Actually, I think that only works between men, but I have no problem asking the next man I see to slap you wherever you'd like." I joked back.

He laughed and it sent vibrations down my spine and tingles in my stomach. I enjoyed spending time with him here, it wasn't my setting, but it was a nice break from thinking about my old world. _Crap_, I thought, _I totally forgot to do some digging_. Patch was walking to the bar to get us soft drinks, and I was enjoying the view.

"Lexi, what do you want?" he called back to me, not without noticing my eyes placed firmly on his backside first.

"A coke is fine." I blushed.

While Patch placed the order, I tried to collect my thoughts. I needed more information, first I wanted to know if people remembered Nora at all, if maybe she was in my place now, or if I was her for good. I also wanted to find a way out, but I wasn't sure how I had even gotten in. Maybe if someone else knew a way….

Patch interrupted my thoughts by handing me my drink.

"Thanks." I told him.

"Anytime, so where would you like to go after this?" He asked me suggestively. The last thing I wanted was to be alone with him, but I needed answers.

"My house?" I replied nervously.

His grin widened and he nodded. His grin gave me goose-bumps, but not in a romantic way. I had seen that grin before on almost every psycho killer in every scary movie ever made. I tried to wash my nerves down with Coke, but it didn't help.

"Let's go." He spoke quietly, and I could only nod in response.

He took my hand and led the way out, leaving our drinks behind at the table. The grip around my hand tightened and I suddenly felt nauseous. I always felt queasy when trouble was near, from a very early age, and I was really hoping I didn't follow through. We hopped on the motorcycle and I held Patch tightly. I was still nervous even though we had made it to Bo's safely.

We pulled up to the farmhouse a half hour later and I shakily got off of the bike.

"Steady there." Patch said to me, but I wasn't really listening. Between the nerves I felt for having him at my home alone and for riding on a motorcycle twice on a day, I thought I was going to hit the ground at any moment.

I took a deep breath and was able to calm the trembling in my knees and legs, and walked to the front door. I pulled the key out my pocket and pushed it into the door's lock slowly, I was trying to buy time. Did I really, _really_ want him in the house? My interest in this new life won over, and I turned the key. Patch followed behind me as I made my way into the living area.

"Nice house." He commented.

I could only blush and smile in response. After all, it wasn't really my house.

He immediately hurried towards the kitchen.

"Hungry?" I asked him with a slight smile. I had no clue what he was doing.

He glanced up and winked at me, I blushed again.

He busied himself for a moment while I took of my jacket and hung it on the coat hanger near the front door. I could hear him turn around, and I know that he must've seen me in just my corset top. It was a drastic measure, but I knew men answered more honestly when they were slightly distracted, and I was certainly not above using my feminine charms. I stayed turned around for a few more seconds, pretending to busy myself with the jacket sleeves, while I let him drink me in.

When I finally did turn around, I gulped. In his right hand, gripped tightly, was a sharp metal object. _No amount of sexy clothing could make up for this_, I thought.

"What're you doing?" I asked, hoping I would hear an answer that made holding a knife seem normal.

"Lexi…."He sighed.

I noticed his gaze trailing off as he searched for words, and that was all of the time I needed to run up the stairs and to my bedroom. He took after me immediately and I tried to pick up the pace. Unfortunately, running had never been my strong suit. I made it to my room and was closing the door when he kicked it. The force sent me skidding on my butt and leaving me next to my bed. It had shocked me so much, my reaction time slowed and he hauled me off of my feet and threw me onto the bed.

"What the…" I tried to yell, but his hand clamped down around my mouth.

I had no clue what was happening. This didn't seem like the Patch that was introduced in the book, but who was I kidding, I hadn't even gotten that far. I felt guilty, knowing I wasn't doing Nora's character justice. I'm sure she didn't get killed by the second chapter.

I bit his hand and kicked him in the stomach, surprising him, I ran to the bathroom closing the door behind me. I locked it and said a silent prayer. _Maybe I could trick him into stopping_, I thought. I heard him banging on the door.

"Lexi, let me in. I'm stronger than you know, and I can take down this door." He yelled.

I began to tear up, this is what I had left my life for and I was going to die. I didn't feel a sense of belonging, all I felt was dread. But I had to try. I didn't have much, but I knew any life was worth more than getting killed so soon.

"I'm not who you think I am!" I screamed.

"Not buying it." He called back from behind the door. He gave me an ultimatum, either I let him in and it could be easy or he would fight his way into the room.

"Please, just wait. My name is Lexi Thomas, I'm not Nora. I was just thrust into this world. I don't belong here and I want to go home." I pleaded.

I heard a pause outside the door, knowing I must've said something right for the first time all day, I continued.

"It's true. I come from Maine, but not Coldwater. My parents both died in a car accident when I was ten. My most recent foster parents were Patrick and Sally. They disappeared and I didn't know where they went. I wished to be somewhere else and I ended up here. The real girl's name is Nora Grey, I took her place. I'm so sorry. Please don't hurt me. We can….we can talk it out." I rambled on nervously.

There was quiet throughout the house and for a moment I thought he had left. If only I was so lucky.

"Lexi, open the door." He calmly commanded me. I don't know why, but I obliged.

"Good girl." He said smugly.

I noticed the knife was still in his hand, but his grip was significantly loosened. I knew running wouldn't work, so I continued with my plea.

"I swear, I am not who you're looking for. Let me go."

"Lexi." He murmured. He looked up at me with acuteness.

He believed me, he had to. It's the only way he would've stopped. I looked up at him hopefully. He grasped the knife in his hand intensely again, all the while his eyes never left my face. He raised the knife up and it was the last thing I saw before I screamed. Everything around me went black, and I was sure I was dead.


	3. Chapter 3

_**"Hey guys, I've never written an intro to a chapter before but here goes: I'm sorry I haven't updated this recently. This is a very short chapter, but lately I've read the entire (or published) series of the Mortal Instruments and the Infernal Devices, and I've been so caught up with everything Shadowhunter (or I should say JACE!) that I have (almost) forgotten about my beloved Patch. I will start reading Hush, Hush again soon so I can get back in the swing of things. I want to do Patch and Lexi justice after all! I am also fairly new to the FanFiction board (with this username anyways), so please review or message me with any helpful tips at all! I'd also love to work with someone on a story, for any series of common interest, so there's that too. Alright, well read on I guess... :)"**_

I felt a gush of water land over my entire body, pushing my mind towards consciousness. As my eyes flew open I noticed Patch standing above me, holding a bucket.

I sat up abruptly, my hands reaching out to my own face, making sure that I was still alive.

"What the-" I shouted, interrupted by Patch's hand clasping over my mouth.

He responded to my question with a look that said _be quiet, or you'll regret it_. I stared back at him, not backing down. It was time I received some answers. I tried to bite his hand away from my mouth, but he was too smart for that and angled his hand just so I wasn't able to. I gave him another intense stare and he finally dropped his hand away, I tried to sit up, finding a towel in my path. Remembering I had just gotten somewhat drenched, I picked it up and used it to dry my body and hair to the best of my ability. Patch sat down on the bed next to me giving me an inquisitive glance.

"Are you okay?" He said almost nervously. I bit my tongue for a minute, knowing once I did speak it would be loud, assertive, and not the kindest of words.

"Am I okay?! You tried to…You tried to kill me! Why would you think I would be okay with that? You need to go away now before I call the police. Why would you even think about staying after?! You are an insane psychopath and I want you out!" I hollered.

"You don't have your phone anyways." He mumbled.

"Excuse me? I can find one! Why aren't you leaving?!" I continued. I couldn't figure out why he was still here, or why I was as well. If he wanted to kill me, why didn't he, if he wanted to back out, he should have left. _I have to get a phone_, I thought.

"Listen, you need to be quiet, your scream earlier already scared the neighbors, and I had to _convince_ them everything was alright. Calm down, I will explain everything as soon as you answer some of my questions first." He was too calm for almost committing a murder.

"I don't think I owe you any explanation what so ever. Are you missing the point here? You tried to kill me, end my life, does that seem normal to you? Or are you a sociopath?" Rage was building inside of me, I felt betrayed. I was positive he didn't intend harm onto Nora, but unfortunately, I wasn't her.

"If I was a sociopath, I would have finished the job. Now tell me what you were talking about before. Who is Nora? And you kept mumbling while you were…asleep about a book. Something like 'it's not in the book'?"

I wasn't sure how to reply. Did I really want to tell a man the truth when, not more than a few hours ago, he tried to kill me?

"Tell me, Lexi, and I will tell you what you want to know."

I paused for a minute, unsure how to continue. Instead of beating around the bush some more, I went straight into my story from the very beginning, starting with my real parents' car accident. I told him everything and I wasn't even sure why. For almost being killed, I didn't feel very afraid. I felt uneasy, but there was no fear in me. When I had finished, Patch looked down at me. I hadn't realized he was still standing by the bed, with me sitting on it. I patted the seat next to me. I felt vulnerable, no one had known that much about me before, and here I was telling it to my almost-murderer. He accepted my request and sat down next to me just far enough to where we weren't touching.

"Lexi…" He paused, "I don't even know how to reply to that. I don't even think that's possible, and I've seen a lot in my time."

"I'm sure all of your, what, 18 years have been so profound. Can you just tell me why you want me dead?"

Patch stayed silent, a look of confliction on his face. Should he tell her or should he just end things the way he should have all along? He still had a chance. Making his mind up, he reached into his pocket where he had stored the knife for safe keeping.


	4. Chapter 4

**"Okay, for all my reviews- thank you! I love them all! I didn't realize until it was too late that I had been writing this story not in first person like I was. So this chapter will be a bit weird, but I promise I am still writing right now, and it's switching back. I know Patch seems out of character, but I liked people realizing that if you change one character completely others might start to follow. Feel free to message me ideas or questions for the next chapters! Do you think Patch and Lexi will/should fall in love? Do you think Lexi should go back to where she came from? Where is Nora? Anyways, here is a mini chapter, and another should be on its way soon!"**

Lexi squealed thinking Patch was reaching for the knife again, and he was.

He pulled his hand out of his pocket and the knife gleamed in the moonlight. He looked at her, his face displaying emotions she didn't understand, and dropped the weapon onto the floor and kicked it away with his boot. She glanced up at Patch confused.

"I needed to kill you…" he took a deep breath before he continued, "I needed to kill you because I…Oh hell. I'm just going to say it then. Lexi, I am not of this world. I am not human. I cannot feel things the way you do, and if I killed you, I could. I would become whole; I could have a real life the way I'm sure I was always meant to."

She stared at Patch dumbfounded. Her mind was racing a mile a minute and she was unsure what to say back. She wasn't sure of her part in all of this, wasn't sure what he meant by he wasn't human, wasn't even sure why she had been put in this story anyway.

"Not human? Not human?! That's the best excuse you have? What do you take me for? Some sort of idiot? I may have explained to you how I fell into a book, and yes I expect you to believe that, but don't try to pull the wool over my eyes here. So, Patch, either tell me the real story, or I'll have to…." Remembering she didn't have a phone on here, Lexi glanced down searching for a way to threaten Patch. She saw the knife, in her reach, and she dragged it towards her with her foot, grabbing it as soon as she could. She didn't want to hurt him, not really, she just wanted information. "I'll have to injure you!"

Patch laughed, looking more amused than she had ever seen him before. This only angered her more, and she stood up, standing over him, hoping to intimidate him the way he had always done to her.

"This. Is. Not. Funny." She growled, thrusting the knife out towards his chest.

"I happen to find it very amusing. You cannot kill me with that knife; you can't even injure me with it, especially with how you're holding it. Are you going to poke me to death with it?"

Lexi grimaced; mad that she had not had proper defense training before, she swore if she ever got home she would take a class on it.

"Fine!" she shouted and dropped the knife, "I just don't know how you presume I'm going to believe you."

"I don't very well care if you believe me, but I owe you an explanation. You explained your sudden appearance here as "falling into a book", well it's actually that's a very accurate description of how I arrived here as well." Patch looked Lexi in the eyes and she saw nothing but truth lying in them.

"You came through a book too?" she questioned.

"Not exactly," Patch chuckled to himself, "I fell from heaven."

Lexi's mouth dropped open, she knew it shouldn't have, but it made sense. The cover was a remarkable picture of an angel, almost frozen in mid-air, with its back bent into a horrible fashion. Like the angel was falling, falling down to Earth. She had thought it symbolized something, not that it was literal.

"Patch," she whispered so that her voice was almost inaudible, "I still don't understand."

He looked down, mystified as to why he was telling her all of this, hoping that they could help each other.

"Lexi, I was an angel, one of the greats, not surprisingly of course. In heaven love was forbidden, well to love anyone but the big man upstairs anyway, and I didn't want that. I didn't want a life full of rules and regulations. I could see the humans, falling in love with one another, making their own decisions, and I wanted so desperately to join them. I didn't know what would happen after the fall, rumor was you became a human. Unfortunately, that was not the case. When I fell, my wings were stripped from me I became one of the Fallen. My body, physically, is like any of yours, though I do not feel as you do. I cannot feel anything. If I were to kill you, the female descendant of my Nephilim vassal, I would become human again. Or so says the Book of Enoch. I would be able to feel physical sensations." Patch continued to stare at the ground and Lexi was torn between sitting down next to him and comforting him and hiding under the bed in fear of him. Eventually the former outweighed the latter and she put her hand on his shoulder.

"Why do you show me kindness?" Patch asked, all of his cockiness from earlier had dissipated.

"I…I don't know. We're both in similar situations aren't we? We both wanted one thing, and got it, but not in the way we originally wanted it. But, what is a Nephilim, or a vassal? What do you mean you can't feel? You can't feel my hand on your shoulder?" She asked.

"Nephilim is an offspring of a fallen angel like me, and a human. When Nephilim come of age, 16, they are able to swear an oath fealty to a fallen angel, and we control their body for the Hebrew month of Cheshvan. I can't feel your hand, not physically, I can feel it in my heart and I know it is there, but I don't really feel it as you would." Patch said answering her questions.

Lexi had so many questions, all rising to the surface, wanting to come out of her mouth all at once, but she stopped them. She dropped her hand away from Patch and into her lap while she let her mind wander. How could she even think angels were real, and that there was one in front of her? _No_, she shook her head, _I must be dreaming_. But when she tried to pinch herself nothing happened. She looked at Patch feeling a mixture of confusion, awe, fear, and something she didn't want to address. She pushed all of her emotions to the side though, and spoke of a question dancing around in her brain instead.

"You possess them? Why would they want to swear the oath? It sounds awful." She shuddered as she imagined being controlled by someone else.

"We force them to, that's how it is done 99% of the time." His response was abrupt.

"I have so many questions, I don't even know where to begin." She muttered.

Patch turned towards her so that they were facing each other. He didn't look ashamed any longer, he had lived with this for long enough that it was just who he was.

"Lexi, I know you have questions. I will answer them as best as I can, but I have questions for you as well. You said something about a Nora, you said you came here through a book, and there is the matter of your current mother coming home soon." He said.


	5. Chapter 5

_**"Okay! Back to first person! Hooray! Lot's of lemons here folks! Maybe it's about time for some of you, or maybe I should hide from the others. There will be a short passage of my thoughts at the end (or bottom) of this chapter. I promise I will write more tomorrow, or tonight, and it will be published soon!"**_

I looked at Patch in a moment of confusion, "My mother? Oh! She's not coming back until tomorrow."

His expression changed, but was still unreadable in my eyes.

"Patch…" I started, he looked me directly in the eyes as he had done a few times before, "Why did you decide not to kill me, if it had always meant so much to you?"

"I don't know." He simply stated. "I guess I understood your sense of distress and your longing to belong. Even if it was a different type of longing, you want to go home I know, I can relate. And what you said, it made sense. Yesterday, I remember you as you are now. Your body looks the same as I remember, and I'm sure I can't forget that." He flashed his signature grin, one I realized I had begun to miss in the craziness of the last several hours. "But, your personality is different. Yesterday, I felt your apprehension, but today you went along with me like we were already good friends."

I could feel myself flush, "I went along with you today because I thought we were friends. Or more, or…I don't know! I just knew you were made to be the 'hero' figure in this book, or so I thought, and I guess I trusted you."

"'Or more'?" He smiled. "Why Lexi, I never knew you found me so attractive. I can guarantee you I'm no hero though."

"I never said you were attractive, and yes, well I know that now don't I. Let's just pretend I was 'keeping my friends close and my enemies closer'. But, as weird as this sounds, thank you for not killing me. I was starting to forget my life was worth anything, but nothing can you remind you of the opposite quite like almost dying." I joked halfheartedly.

"I'm sorry, I really am. And to make it up to you, I am prepared to help you!" Patch declared, standing up.

"What makes you think I want your help now? Now, you have your own journey, I have mine, and we can be on our way." I knew my mind felt this way, but something deeper instantly regretted it. This is a man who just told me that not only is he not human and decidedly evil, but who almost tried to murder me. So why did I still feel a strange magnetic pull towards him.

"To start with, you're blushing so hard you look like you've got a fever, and if I help you, maybe this 'Nora' will come back and help me. She was a huge part of the book as you've said, so she probably knows what to do."

Patch reached out a hand for me and yanked me to my feet as well. I had still not recovered from all of the stress that had been induced that night so my knees buckled and I could feel my body give out. Expecting to hit the floor, I was startled by a pair of hands that came up to meet me. Patch had me in his arms, so close to him I could feel his breath on my face. It was evidence that while he smelled like smoke, it didn't come from his mouth directly, but the others around him. His breath smelled of mint, and was so intoxicating that I wasn't sure if it was the excitement from earlier, the fall, or him that was making my head hurt and my vision murky.

"Lexi?" He whispered looking at me in concern. I wanted to answer back, to recover and say that I was fine, but all of the events of that past two days had really gotten to me. Everything came back in my head, the disappearance, the book, almost being killed, being given a second chance, Nora, Vee, and mainly Patch.

I knew I should have been terrified of him, I should have told him to leave and never return, and I know that he would have listened if I had said it with any conviction. But I didn't want that, not really. I was so confused, more so than ever before in my life. He was stuck wandering around, not really belonging but wanting to, and I was the same. It was like we were so similar I could understand everything he did and why he did it. If I were in his shoes and knew a sacrifice would save me, would return me to where I wanted to go, would I not take it, or at least try? I know I couldn't now, but maybe after spending however many hundreds of years stuck in the same place, maybe I could.

I felt myself being laid down onto the bed, with the covers being placed on top of me. I almost thought I was back home; there was no way Patch could act like this. But he did. Just giving me another question or thought to ponder that would make my mind unable to rest. I felt Patch silently moving towards the door, out of the house for the night and maybe forever. My mouth started to move before my mind could catch up to what I was saying.

"Stay. Please." I mustered up all of the energy I had left.

"Lexi, you don't know what you're saying. While I'm sure of sound mind, you would love to sleep with me, right now might not be the best time. I did try to inflict harm upon you. I'm so sorry."

"Please." was all I could say back to him. I knew he was right, not about me wanting to sleep with him (well, maybe), but about him intending to hurt me. It was something so weird I couldn't describe, but I understood all of it.

I didn't hear a response, but I did feel the bed shift and a large weight was suddenly on my right. I curled up on my side and he understood. He curled next to me and put his arm around me, shielding me from all of the bad that had occurred earlier.

Before drifting off into a much needed sleep, I could hear him whispering to me.

"Lexi, sleep. We'll get you back to your home, I won't make you stay here, and I won't hurt you. I know what it's like. You will return home and you'll find your family. I promise. Everything will be as it should."

I believed him, and as I did, I felt a great weight lifting off of my shoulders. We had each other and that was something. We could search for a passage home for me, but I wouldn't give up on him. There was something I could do to help him out of this state of limbo he was stuck in. I knew it wasn't like this with Nora, I'm sure it couldn't have been, but maybe it was better. For me it was, I knew that. I felt safe for the first time since I had arrived, and that was my last thought before drifting off into the great, calm, dreamless sleep I had been waiting for.

_**"SO folks, now that you've read that. What do you think? Personally, I think she's a bit crazy to trust someone who almost killed her, but that's who she is. She gets it, she's in a sort-of similar position, and that's what I love about Lexi as a character. And let's not forget all of her different foster homes! All she really wants is to belong somewhere, to really fit in, and she thinks she can do that best with her last home. What do you think of Patch and her as a team? Do you think it will be romantic or platonic? Oooo can't wait to see where it goes myself! Enjoy!"**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**"Oy, I'm on a roll tonight. Enjoy, some lemons!"**_

I felt the sun come in through the window as our housekeeper whipped my curtains open. I felt groggy, and I never had been much of a morning person either, so as I recalled last night's events I gasped. _Patch!_ I felt the bed next to me and I could still feel the heat from where his body had been, but where he was no longer.

"I didn't mean to startle you Lexi." Dorothea said.

"Oh, it's fine." I stammered back.

Where did he go, if the bed was still warm, was he still here in the room? If so, I had to get her out.

"Um, Dorothea, do you think you could pack me a lunch of…." I was trying to think of a food that would take a long time to make, "macaroni and cheese?"

"Sure Lexi. But try to stay away from so many carbs; you won't be this thin forever."

I grew hot all over and I hoped Patch wasn't still in the bedroom listening to this. The last thing I wanted him to be thinking about was a larger version of me. I wasn't sure what my feelings on him were anymore, but thinking about a plus size Lexi wouldn't do us any good either way.

I watched as she exited my bedroom, finally feeling a little at peace, I took a deep breath and released it. When I opened my eyes I found Patch leaning back on my desk, looking unfazed and irresistible (though I would never let him know) with a slightly messy bedhead and wrinkled clothes. He was doing his signature grin, and for a moment I could almost forget everything that had unfolded between us.

"You're one of those morning people aren't you?" I groaned.

He smiled at me, "Maybe if you laid off of the carbs you wouldn't be so grumpy."

In response, I threw a pillow at him. It wasn't the most mature thing, but it did make me feel better.

"How did you get out of the bed so quickly, where were you?" I asked.

"Oh, just one of the many pluses of being a fallen angel, superhuman strength and speed and all of that." He looked smug.

"Let me guess; and superhuman good looks too? Just so you can attract your prey?" It was out of my mouth before I knew what I had said.

"So you think I have above average good looks, do you? If that's really why you wanted me to stay last night, you should have just said so."

Embarrassed, I sat up in bed ignoring his jokes. It was good to have playful Patch back, but part of me missed his sympathy from last night. _I'm sure that was just a one-time thing anyways_, I thought annoyed.

"Patch, I have to get dressed, so if you don't mind…" I stood up from the bed with one last stretch and walked to the closet.

"You want my help don't you, well part of that comes with me telling you what you would normally wear. I don't think I told you this, but I've been following you, or Nora I guess, since the school year started. No one knows you better than me, and if you want to fool the kids in school, I can help."

He did make a valid point, but I was not at all impressed with hearing that he had been following me (even if it wasn't really me) around for a while.

"Fine," I huffed. I pointed to my closet, "come here and tell me what I should wear."

Patch strode over with a confidence that made me want to strangle him. Couldn't he see that this was beyond weird? It dawned on me then that weird had been his life for hundreds of years now, and even before.

"Well, I think you should wear this," he picked up a black laced bra and pantie set and held it out to me, "but I think you're going to have to put something on top of it."

I had lived with different boys long enough to know that their obsession with women's lingerie was odd, but it would never go away. I turned my nose up, matching his confidence, and grabbed the underwear from his outstretched hand. He contained his look of surprise well enough, but I could see a darkness flash across his eyes that I had not seen before.

"Very well, what should go on top then?" I asked.

"Why don't you go to the bathroom and put on this part of the outfit and when you come back, I will have decided." He challenged me.

I wasn't sure if he knew my weakness for a challenge, if he could sense it, or if he had the same fault, but it seemed like it.

"I dare you." He teased with a sly smile.

I yanked the undergarments from his hand and traveled to the bathroom across the hall. It was nice to finally be alone, but even alone my thoughts wandered to the mysterious man who was picking out attire for me in my bedroom. _I am crazy_, I thought, _I should be terrified not trying to impress him_. But I wasn't. Everything that had happened yesterday was done, this was a new day, and being afraid wouldn't accomplish anything. I took off my clothes from the previous day, not caring that I had never changed into pajamas, and hooked on my bra and slid on my panties. I grabbed a towel that was next to the shower and put it around my body, thinking about the previous night when I had tried to lock myself in here.

I was still contemplating this when I left the bathroom and walked back into my room, where Patch had laid a very bland looking outfit onto the bed. He looked up at me regarding me with interest, raising his eyebrows slightly.

"I assume to get dressed you will be taking that towel off?"

I blushed, "You assume correctly."

He smiled, looking pleased with himself. I grabbed the outfit from the bed near where he was standing, and went to walk to the closet to change. As I was a step away from him, I felt the towel come loose from my body.

"Cheater." He smiled conceitedly, happy with his prize.

"I'm the cheater? You said nothing about dressing in front of you!" I couldn't believe I was having an argument with a man in bedroom whilst wearing lingerie. I had never even made out with anyone before.

"It was implied."

Not wanting to look weak, and knowing he had already seen all there was to see, I started dressing in front of him.

"I could get used to seeing this every morning." He said.

"Yeah, well don't." I knew there was no harm done, but I had never felt more vulnerable.

I lifted my right leg to put it into the pair of jeans he had picked out, but lost my balance, and for the second time in twenty four hours, I found myself in his arms. Yesterday had been bad enough, but now he was holding me and I was wearing half a pant leg and a bra.

I flushed a deep crimson and tried to remove myself from his arms. He was stronger than me though, and he wanted me to remain, so I did.

"So weird, you always ending up here somehow." He smirked.

"I know, horrible isn't it? But your arms just can't seem to get enough of me." I laughed back, my voice shaking a bit.

Everything about being in his arms felt right, but in my mind, I knew it was wrong. I knew the way he looked at me, barely clothed, was wrong, that he should really be looking at Nora that way. But I also knew that something in me was pulling me towards him, that maybe it was okay. I looked up at him through my eyelashes, and he stared back down at me. We must have stayed like that for so long, neither of us moving or saying anything.

I could smell the mint again as I felt his breath on me, and it clouded my mind the way it had before. I looked at his lips, which looked so soft and so kissable, and I wanted nothing more than to pull him down to me and feel his lips on mine.

I shook my head, this wasn't me thinking. It had to be someone else. My last concern is always boys. _But Patch was not a boy_, my inner voice reminded me, _he was a man, a man who could help_.

I untangled myself from his arms while he never took his eyes off of me. I turned around and finished dressing, glad when I did. I went to return the towel (that had not lived up to its intended purpose) to the bathroom when I remembered a question that had been on my mind. _Now was as good a time as any to break the tension_, I thought.

"Yesterday, when you were, um, going after me, and I was in the bathroom, you had me open the door. I didn't want to, but I did it. How did you do that?" I asked, taking him by surprise.

"Fallen angels, we can get inside of your mind, create any sort of image or thoughts we want you to see or think." He said nonchalantly.

_Oh, so that's why I wanted to kiss him so badly_, I thought.

"No, I'm afraid the only time I used that on you was yesterday. Anything that you just felt I can't say I'm responsible for. I do, however, understand why you would want to kiss me."

"Oh my gosh, did I really say that out loud?" I put my hand over my eyes to hide myself in shame and slid down to the bed.

"I don't blame you; lots of girls feel that way about me." He was so arrogant sometimes.

"Can we get back on topic please? So, you said you would help me with school. What do I need to know to fit in?" I silently prayed that he would not bring this up again.

He appeared disappointed he had to stop teasing me, but rattled off a list of things about Nora.

"Your best friend is Vee, you're a journalist for the school's E-Zine, your favorite music is baroque, you live with your mother and your dad was murdered last year, you're enemies with the head cheerleader of the school Marcie Millar, and you just switched seats in class next to me."

"Whoa, you don't waste time collecting information, do you?" I asked. I was shocked he knew so much, but then, anything about Patch shouldn't surprise me anymore. I put on the shoes Patch had picked out for me, and stood up.

"I sure don't," he said, "Now, ready to conquer the day?"

"How am I going to get you downstairs?" I wondered.

"Easy, I'll go through the window and meet you out front; I parked my motorcycle a street down while you were unconscious last night." He stated.

"Fine, but I don't want to take the bike. I'd like to ride safely in a car."

He looked amused but nodded his head in agreement, "Only if I can drive." He said.

I shot him a look that said fine, but this isn't over, and headed downstairs.

Dorothea glanced up from the kitchen, "I put the mac and cheese in a container inside your backpack." she smiled.

"Thanks!" I said hurriedly. I grabbed my backpack and ran out the front door, acknowledging the housekeepers advice on me coming home after school to see my mother.

I forgot about her, I hadn't had to pretend in front of her yet. This made me nervous, which was how Patch found me while he sat in the driver's seat of my car.

"What's wrong?" he sounded concerned.

"Don't pretend to care when you don't. Let's just hope I find something valuable at school so I can get out of here and you can get your Nora back." I snapped. It was something I did whenever I knew I was hurting someone else. A punishment of sorts, if I made someone upset, I shouldn't have anyone care about me. I didn't deserve it.

Patch, who had started down my street towards the school, slammed on the breaks. My head jerked forwards and I felt another headache coming on.

"What the-?" I exclaimed angrily.

He looked at me with a fierceness that took my breath away.

"Lexi, don't say that. I care. If I didn't care, you wouldn't still be here, as harsh as that may sound. I don't even know who this Nora is."

I was taken aback, I had no idea he really cared. I should have figured it out last night, when he chose to stay with me. He could have left, he could have killed me, but he didn't.

"I'm sorry." I said.

"Don't ever apologize to me. I don't need it from you. I don't deserve to have that from you."

"Patch…" I started, not sure how to continue.

"Lexi, don't. I want to help you, and that's what I'll do."

I nodded. I hated how my feelings for Patch were getting jumbled. He began to drive again, and this time he didn't stop except for red lights and stop signs. The whole rest of the ride he was silent, and I was too. I couldn't say anything I was thinking, like how I wish he would stay with me again tonight because it was the best sleep I'd gotten since my birth parents' accident, that I really did wish he had kissed me today just to see what it'd been like, or that I knew he had good in him, and he was good. I wanted to say all of these things, but I didn't. Instead, when we finally reached the school, I told him to act like the last night never happened. To not talk to me unusually in biology or make any jokes about how he knew what kind of underwear I was wearing. I told him I'd speak to him afterschool about any discoveries by phone, and that was that. I watched him walk away to first period, confused as to why he went to school (maybe he liked it?) and confused why he wanted to help me so much. Mainly, as I walked to first period and sat down, I wondered why it all mattered to me so much. Thankfully the first period bell rang and I was yanked out of my thoughts. I would revisit them later, but not if I could help it.


	7. Chapter 7

_**"So I love this chapter guys! And I want to dedicate it to Dallas and Allie (Guests) who I am not able to reply to. You all motivate me so much to continue writing! And I'm finally getting back in the swing of things, so I should be able to write more often. So read, review, message, do it all if you'd like! Here's to 's Patch!"**_

School that day turned out to be pretty mundane. The only bits of excitement were my meetings with Vee in the hallway. She was so bubbly it was impossible to be any sort of upset near her. We carried on casual conversations in which she proceeded to tell me about what all of the single, attractive males in her classes were up to. She asked how I thought she could snag them, and then asked if maybe Patch would go for her. I jumped in quickly at that.

"You know. I don't really think he's your type after all Vee, you could do better."

"What do you mean 'better'? He's such a hunk, Lexi! Unless, you do want him?" Vee asked.

I felt heat rise up to my cheeks and I tried to stop myself from muttering. "No. I just don't think he's good news." There, that was direct enough.

"Fine, but if he's bad news then you don't need to be in that either." She stated simply. Even though I didn't know Vee, she seemed to be able to read me very well.

"I'm not in 'it'! I don't like him!" I defensively through my hands up in the air, I said this more for me than her. I didn't like him, I couldn't.

"Oh Lexi, I saw him checking you out during our pop quiz in Biology. He stared at you the entire time girl. You know, maybe this calls for a hit it and quit it moment. I'd be okay if you wanted to test drive the Ferrari as long as you buy the mini-van." She smiled.

"I have no idea what that even means. And I highly doubt he was looking at me, he was probably trying to look at my answers." I blushed again. I didn't know if Nora was, but I was definitely a virgin, and wasn't up for any one night stands at this point in my life. Not that Patch would even consider that anyways.

"It means…" she drawled, "you can have your fun with the bad boy for a little while as long as you end up with the safe, dependable guy."

I rolled my eyes at here and she took the hint to drop the subject. Patch followed my instructions and didn't speak to me in Biology; he didn't even nudge me or make inappropriate jokes when the teacher ('Coach') talked about sex. It should have made me happy that he was respecting my wishes, but it didn't. I started to miss his cockiness and his sly grin; they were two of the only things I was absolutely sure about in this reality.

* * *

Walking to my car in the parking lot after school was my first chance to really think alone all day. It ended up not doing much good. I tried to think of a way out, maybe if I wished hard enough, something would change, or maybe if I asked Patch he could get an angel to help. That only led me to thinking more about Patch. I could see his dark eyes every time I close my own, I could match everything I saw to something that reminded me of him. The chalkboard in my creative writing class was black like everything Patch wore. Like his eyes. The pink and red roses planted around the school bared resemblance (in my mind at least) to his soft lips. The chair I sat in, in almost all my classes, while strong, was not as sturdy as I felt Patch's arms were.

"What is wrong with me?" I asked aloud to myself while shaking my head.

"You look more than fine to me."

My eyes darted up, my vision finally clearing, and something inside of me gave a tug.

"Patch…You can't scare people like that!" I decided to let myself think the reason my face was so red and my heart rate sped up was because he startled me.

"I've been in your clear view for at least two minutes now." His brow furrowed as if he was confused.

"I had other things on my mind, sorry." I mumbled. "Besides, I thought I told you to use a phone to contact me. Unless… you found something out?"

"You know you missed me." He flashed his signature grin.

_I did_, I thought.

"I didn't." I said stubbornly, "Now did you find anything out?"

"No, I didn't. No one that I've talked to knows any sort of Nora here." He frowned.

I let out an audible sigh and put my key into the driver side door.

"You aren't giving me a ride?" he said, faking shock.

"Oh. I forgot we came here together. I can drop you off home if you want?" I felt my cheeks darken yet again as I thought about sleeping with him the previous night.

"No, I prefer to keep my whereabouts unknown. I'll just borrow someone's car." He winked.

"You're going to steal a car, aren't you? Why don't you just let me take you, after all, I know a lot about you already, and what's a location going to do to change anything?"

"Always the persistent one, you are. I guess if you're so adamant on being in a confined space with me, I have to say yes."

"If you want to steal a car, then fine. That's your own problem." I tossed my hair behind my shoulders, opened the car door, and sat down on my seat. I went to close it, but his hand stopped me.

"I like my record the way it is right now, and I wouldn't want to put anymore marks on it, so I'll take your offer." Patch announced, like he was doing me a favor.

I stayed silent as I shut my door and waited for him to climb in next to me. I didn't realize just how nervous I'd be with him next to me in such a small area. At least I was the one driving and I could concentrate on that.

"So, what's the address?" I asked. I had to know where I was going, but I was just as curious to know where he lived. In a ghetto somewhere out of town, next to **Bo's**, maybe he didn't even have a house…My mind wandered.

"Ever heard of Delphic Amusement?" he asked me back.

"Sort of. Wait, you live in a theme park?" I had heard the kids around town talking about it on my first day of school.

"Sort of." He repeated.

Was there anything else to know about Patch? He seemed so full of secrets, even after I had discovered so many of them.

"Whoa there Lexi. You might want to concentrate on the road." He said, bracing himself rather dramatically on the dashboard.

"Don't be a baby." I teased.

I turned to look at him, and amidst the playfulness I had forgotten just how beautiful he was. He grinned slightly and that was all my brain needed to take off again.

_Stop liking him!_ I argued with myself silently. _This isn't your story to be a part of, you can't have him._

I was so conflicted inside. On one hand, there was a noticeably great guy who did have a heart (figuratively) even if he didn't think so, a guy who was gorgeous and funny and charming all at once, and he trusted me. On the other hand, he also tried to murder me (_he didn't though_, a voice inside my head argued) and he was really cocky. I'm also pretty sure he was going to steal a car if I hadn't stopped him, and he might be leaving me soon anyways (or vice versa).

"Lexi!" Patch shouted, interrupting my inner dialogue.

I refocused on the present and noticed I was pulling into a lane with a car already in it, people were honking and I was drawing a blank. I didn't know what to do.

Patch's hands grabbed the steering wheel and pulled us back into the previous lane and I drove until we found a parking lot to pull into. It wasn't as near death as yesterday had been, but I was still shaken.

Even my feelings for Patch were causing me real life danger.

Everything inside me rose to the surface, and while I was usually great at controlling my emotions in front of others, I gave in. I put my head on the wheel and starting sobbing. I cried for the loss of my latest foster family, I cried for all of the times I had been abandoned. I cried for my birth parents that left tragically, while I remained. I cried for getting lost in a world without any sort of hope. And I sobbed for Patch. I was upset for my feelings and for him, that he had also been handed such an unfair life. He only wanted to love and live as a human, and he wasn't even allowed that.

"Hey…" Patch whispered. I finally noticed that he had moved close to me and was in the process of putting his arms around me.

I wanted to be curled up near him again, but what had that gotten me? It was only going to cost me heartache in the future. I was feeling some of that now and it was unbearable. No, I couldn't do this to myself anymore.

"Get off of me!" I yelled at him. He drew back as if I had slapped him.

"Get out of my car, get out of my life! I don't need you here! I don't need your help! And I don't need your pity!" I continued.

I was breathing heavy, not sure if I was having an anxiety attack or if it took all of my energy to get those words out. I meant them, but only a little. The problem was I needed him too much; I was becoming dependent on him.

Patch looked at me, the hurt visible on his face. He was like me, normally so good at covering everything up, but we were supposed to be in this together now.

"Lexi, get out of the driver's seat and let me take you home. I won't even speak if you don't want me to, but you won't get home safely with the state you're in." he said gently.

I nodded and wiped my tears on my sleeves. I was in the passenger seat in less than a minute and Patch was now in control. I curled up on my right side so he wouldn't see me, and tried to hold all of the pieces in place until I got home.

"Home." I groaned.

"What is it?" he asked nervously, afraid speaking would break me down again.

"My mom's home today and I have to face her." I was terrified. How could I lie to Nora's own mother? But I had to.

"You'll be fine." was all he said in response. It was all I deserved too. I knew I had hurt him.

We stayed silent for the rest of the car ride; his face held a look of apathy and mine was riddled with worry.

As he pulled into my driveway, I looked at him. "Keep the car and just pick me up for school tomorrow."

He nodded once and waited until I had walked to the front door before he left. I felt horrible for what I had said, but there wasn't any turning back now.

* * *

Before I could even open the door to 'my' house, my mother swung it open.

"Oh Lexi, I missed you so much! You know how I hate being away from you for so long!" She pulled me in for a tight hug.

"I know. I missed you too….mom." the word felt foreign on my tongue.

"Well, come in! I already had dinner ready, your favorite lasagna from the store, and some garlic bread."

As she led me into our house I took off my jacket and slung my backpack onto the couch.

"Lexi, you know how I feel about clutter." She said sternly.

_Sheesh, a backpack's clutter? Who is this woman?_ I thought.

"I'll put it in my bedroom after dinner."

"Good girl." She said smiling at me.

I followed her to our dining table where she had laid out the finest dishes, a tradition she assured me, and heaped a pile of lasagna onto my plate. Watching her, I could only think of Patch telling me I would sleep better without carbs. Suddenly, I had lost my appetite.

Once she had started to dig in, I figured now would be the best time to ask her my questions.

"Mom?" I started.

"Yes dear?"

"Do you know why dad was murdered?" I wanted to know everything about Nora because I didn't know how long I was going to be here. I didn't want to mess up her life when she got back.

Blythe, or 'mom', froze, fork halfway to her mouth. "Now, Lexi, you know we don't discuss that. Your father was the very unfortunate, innocent victim of a shooter."

I had so many questions to ask about that, but I sensed her stress and changed the topic. She was supposed to my mother, for now at least, and I had some daughter like things to ask. I never had any questions like this before, so I decided it was best to just spit them out.

"Mom, there's this guy at school. I think I like him and I don't know what to do." It was the watered down version of course, but nonetheless, I could tell I had startled her.

"Tell me more about him. If you like him, ask him out." She said after trying to hide her surprise.

"I can't. I like him, but he's sort of off limits. A girl from out of town, I've never met her, is supposed to be with him…and I just can't help but think it would be wrong of me to admit my feelings for him." I gulped. I hoped I hadn't given anything away.

"If he was his own man, it wouldn't matter. He would make the choice."

"But what if he hasn't met the other girl?"

"What? Lexi, you are making no sense today."

"I'm sorry Mom, I just haven't been thinking properly." I kicked myself mentally for screwing up again.

"Tell me about this boy though, what's he like?" She questioned with a huge grin on her face.

_Mothers_, I thought, _they were so nosy sometimes_.

"He's great, he just doesn't know it." I replied.

"Elaborate." She demanded. I laughed at her persistent-ness.

"Well, he's wonderful. He's gorgeous, and funny, and super sweet to me. But he thinks he's evil…I mean bad, and acts like he doesn't deserve kindness." I felt better getting this off of my chest. _Who knew mother/daughter talks were so therapeutic_?

"If he thinks he's bad, he probably is. I'd stay away. Wait for someone like the captain of the math team or someone in your AP class."

_ Never mind my last statement_, I thought.

"I'll clear up the dishes for you mom. I'm sure you're tired."

"Oh thank you darling." She smiled another motherly smile and kissed my forehead the way parents do. It was a happy moment for me, I was never one who got attention like that, and it was nice to receive some. I knew it wasn't meant for me though, and that thought brought me back down to earth.

* * *

I headed upstairs later that night to put on my pajamas and jump into bed. I searched through Nora's closet again only to find long baggy sweatpants and baggy shirts. I had no problem with this for outerwear on a lazy day, but I hated sleeping in anything that felt restricting.

I chose to just go with a different bra and panty set under a tank top.

I laid down in bed pondering the day's events. I couldn't believe I had been so rude to Patch, I knew I lost my chance at whatever help he had been offering (and maybe more). But I held my own against Blythe at least, and that was saying something. She is one sharp cookie.

I concentrated hard on sleeping then. I didn't want to list my errors anymore, and I wanted my mind to turn off. Eventually, I drifted off to sleep.

* * *

_There was a long dark hallway and I could see a light at the very end and near it were shadows. The more I walked, the clearer the faces of the people became, but the farther away they grew. _

_After five minutes I could see clearly. It was Sally, Patrick, John, Tom, Kate, and Brad, my foster family that had disappeared._

_"Where did you go?" I tried calling out to them, but they only grinned in response. _

_Behind them my birth parents stepped out of the shadows, and so followed the rest of my foster families that had left me. _

_I ran full speed now to try and catch them, but the hallway continued to get longer. _

_Out of nowhere, Patch was halfway between them and me. He was looking at each side, debating where to go, and I tried to speak to him._

_"Please Patch, don't join them. Don't leave me too. I need you. I'm sorry." I pleaded._

_Only my voice wasn't loud enough, his grin matched the faces of those that had abandoned me and he turned on his heels, his back to me, and walked away. _

_"Nooooo!" I screamed, not willing to be left behind. _

_I continued running, and this time I caught up to the end of the hallway, but no one was left. I heard a faint click in the distance and the light where I was went out. Everything was pitch black and I was falling. Falling fast and slow, falling everywhere and nowhere. I let out a yell, terrified, and it stopped. Surrounding me was complete emptiness. _

_I thought it would stay empty forever, but a noise filled the vacant space around me. _

_"Lexi. Lexi. Lexi." It seemed to chant, continuing on and on until I finally woke up._

* * *

"Lexi, wake up!"

I turned over in my bed, shaking from the nightmare that had been so vivid and real, and I noticed my face was wet. I must have been crying.

"Lexi, are you okay?"

I looked up from I was laying and jumped.

"Patch?" I asked relived to see a familiar face. All I wanted to do was bury my face in his shirt and let him hold me, but that wouldn't happen now.

"Patch, what are you doing here?" He must have found some sort of clue as to what happened to Nora.

"Lexi, shhh. Relax. You need to take it easy you're all shaken up." He sounded concerned.

"Why are you here?" I demanded. I didn't want his pity again.

"I-" He started, but paused. He looked afraid to tell me.

"What Patch?" Oh great, now I was the worried one.

"I was bringing back your car, I figured you wouldn't want to see me tomorrow, and I was doing a quick perimeter of the house when I heard you." He looked guilty, like a kid who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"Heard what? Why were you checking out the house?" My mind hurt, the confusion from this brought up only more topics in my head and right now I was trying hard to forget about my nightmare.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay, that's what I was doing. I heard you, you must have been dreaming, but you sounded so scared." He whispered the last part.

"I was having a nightmare." I admitted.

"What was it about?" He looked up at me with a relieved expression. _Did he think I was going to get mad at him for checking on me?_

I looked back at him and the nightmare took hold of me again. I understood it was just a dream, but it had been so real. It hit me like a wave and I was immediately pulled under.

"I'm so sorry. I keep crying in front of you." I sniffled trying to stop the waterworks.

He came around to the side of the bed that was empty and sat down pulling me to him.

Being in his arms again I felt safe. Safe and untouchable, and I let go. As much as the dream had scared me, it was over, and this was real.

"Patch," he looked down at me, brushing a piece of hair out of my face, "what did you hear?"

"Lexi, it doesn't matter." He was rubbing circles onto my skin with his thumb and I felt goosebumps all over my skin. "Are you cold?" He asked. I could only shake my head no.

"Tell me, please." I asked him again. I wanted to know how deep I was in; if I could still turn back and let him have the life he wants without him feeling guilty for leaving me.

He sighed, but answered me, "You were calling out my name. You sounded so scared and alone, you were telling me don't leave and that you need me. I came into your room through your window and tried to comfort you. At one point, I thought you were done so I went to leave and that's when you screamed."

I remained silent, unsure how to proceed. He already knew so much about me, so I decided to tell him about the dream.

When I finished my retelling he looked at me and I saw something flash in his eyes.

"I understand most of it, but why was I in it?" he asked with a small grin.

"You are so fatheaded! I just, I like you, okay?" he smirked and I fought my way out of his arms.

"You can leave now that you got what you wanted. I think I blew your ego up just enough." I crossed my arms.

Patch grabbed my wrist and pulled me to the bed again, lying back in the process. In one simple move he was holding me like he was the night before. I sighed, knowing this is what I wanted and that this is what would break me in the future.

"What's wrong?" he asked me, and I could feel his hot breath on my ear. Tingles shot up my spine.

"You're bound to leave me, or I'm bound to leave you actually, so let's not get too attached."

He spun me around gently so that we were facing each other, our faces nearly touching.

"Stop doing that Lexi. I don't plan on leaving you. I've been here whenever you've needed me haven't I? Please, just relax." He pulled my chin up to look at him, but it was almost too painful.

Looking at him was like staring into the sun or keeping my eyes open in saltwater. It hurt, but what was there was so much beauty that it was worth it.

"Thank you, Patch." I whispered.

He entwined his hand into the back of my hair and gently tugged me toward him. I was looking at his lips; they were a warm pink with tiny creases in them. I bit my bottom lip involuntarily.

"Lexi," he breathed. And then in the blink of an eye, his mouth was on mine.

He tasted of spearmint and his lips felt natural paired with mine. It was a gentle kiss at first, waiting for my permission I assume, and then it became more. I opened my mouth slightly to invite him in and his tongue obliged. I could feel him everywhere, surrounding me, our bodies pushed so close together I wasn't sure where his body started and mine ended. I pulled his shirt towards me and he rolled lightly on top of me. There was a passion and a fire I had never known before. We both broke away, slightly panting, and he had the most brilliant smile on his face.

"I have wanted to do that since the moment I saw your corset top." He laughed.

"Was that before or after you tried to kill me?" I joked.

Patch went rigid underneath me.

"Patch, it was a joke, that's not what I meant." He stopped me from talking, placing a finger in front of my lips.

"What I did was inexcusable, I can never be sorrier. You weren't what I was expecting at all, you were better. I ask that you forgive me, but don't forget. It's not something to brush off, and it will always be my biggest mistake, my biggest regret." He said solemnly.

I had no response, I did forgive him. He should have known that. I understood, everything he did I understood. We were like two puzzle pieces from different boards that just happened to fit together. Instead of speaking, I put my hand in his hair and led his face back to mine.

I kissed him again, very gently, very slowly, savoring every bit of him. I felt sparks in my toes, butterflies in my stomach, and my heart felt like it was floating.

"I can hear your heart beat, it's very erratic right now." He smiled, and I knew he was right.

"What are you doing to me Patch Cipriano?" I breathed.

"I want you to know my real name Lexi; I want you to know the real me. I'm Jev."

And with that he sealed his lips with mine.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning I woke up to a knocking on my bedroom door. It was Nora's mother telling me to hurry up and get dressed or else I was going to be late for school. I called out a response just to let her know I heard her and swung my legs out to the side of the bed.

My head pounded and my eyes didn't want to stay open, _I guess I didn't get much sleep_, I thought. That's when it hit me. This was twice now that I had forgotten Patch was with me the next morning, or maybe I was just so used to his presence it wasn't that big of a deal anymore.

I shook my head trying to collect my thoughts and turned to look at the spot where Patch had been. He was on his back, hands under his head, and his eyes were on me.

"Sleep well?" he smirked.

"Why can I have such a fantastic time with you only to have you be the same old jerk when I wake up?" I retorted.

"I can't believe you still aren't a morning person even after spending the night with me. I can't say I've ever had this negative of an effect on a woman." He grinned even bigger.

I threw my pillow at him while wishing I had something heavier, like a brick, only to have him catch it before it actually hit him.

"I thought you were done with immature antics Ms. Lexi." he chuckled.

Giving Patch the silent treatment, I got up from the bed and went to my closet. Opening the door I let myself in, closing it behind me. If Patch was going to treat me like that at my most sensitive time of the day he didn't deserve to see me half dressed. I thanked whatever gods were listening for having such a large closet at my disposal and grabbed what became my usual uniform; jeans, a long sleeve shirt, and a jacket.

When I came back out of the closet my bedroom was empty. I knew it wasn't likely Patch had wandered down to the kitchen to chat with Blythe over eggs and bacon so I figured he had gone to school. I grabbed my backpack off of the floor of my bedroom and raced downstairs to try and catch up with him, there was no use in pretending I didn't have feelings for him anymore. We spent several hours making out in my bed before falling asleep with our bodies tangled together. I was grinning to myself thinking about our sleeping arrangement as I walked out of the house (but not before reassuring my overbearing mother that I would come home before dark and would be safe on the road) when I felt a light tap on my shoulder.

"Someone's in a better mood." Patch said as I turned to face him. I shoved him over to my car before Blythe would see him, I have no idea what that crazy lady would do if she knew a boy had slept in her supposed daughter's room. He grabbed my keys as I was trying to coax him in the passenger seat and in turn I fell in the car.

"Guess this means you want to drive" I mumbled angrily.

He got in the driver's seat and pulled out of my driveway.

"So what were you smiling about?" he asked turning to look at me with a knowing smile.

"Nothing." I said stubbornly.

_Tell me_, he whispered to my mind. I had almost forgotten he could do that, that he was a fallen angel.

"I was thinking about last night." I surrendered.

"But you had a nightmare." He said with fake confusion as he attempted to coax the answer from me.

I threw my hands in the air, "Must your ego be stroked at every turn?"

_Maybe_, he spoke silently again with a huge grin on his face.

"I was thinking about what happened after that. It made me… happy." I blushed.

He came to stop and pulled my chin towards him with his index finger. I gazed into his eyes for a moment before I felt him brush his lips on mine. My heart started to pound in my chest and I was well aware he could hear it.

Changing the topic before I could be embarrassed, I asked him a question that had been on my mind since the first time he kissed me.

"Patch, if you can't feel, why do you want to kiss me or hold me?" He put the car back in drive and continued on the path to school.

"I can't feel it, that's true, but when I kiss you what do you feel?"

It was such a deep question that I was taken aback.

"I..." I began before my neck and face turned incredibly red, this was such a deep and personal question I wasn't sure I wanted to answer it. But it was Patch and I had already been open with him about so much. "I feel sparks where you kiss me, and warmth, and my stomach gets butterflies, and my body gets all tingly." I cut myself off. That was as much as he needed to know.

I looked at the ground suddenly self-conscious.

"Listen to your description, only a few of those things are actually physical sensations. The rest come from your heart. This is what it's like for me, I feel it here" he took my hand and pressed it to his heart, "even if I may not have an actual heart."

I stayed silent as we reached the high school.

"Patch, I don't want to go to school." I said as he looked amused.

"Now I definitely know you aren't the same person." He smirked playfully.

"It's just, I'm not going to find anything out here, and it's not like missing a day of school is going to mess with my I.Q." I said more than ready to put up a fight.

"Okay."

"Plea- Wait? Okay, that's it?"

"That's it. I want to show you something anyway." He looked at me with that same unidentifiable expression on his face that I still couldn't figure out.

"Okay."

He left the school and turned onto the main road while I leaned my head against the window. I closed my eyes, not noticing before how little sleep I actually got. It must have been less than five hours. I could feel the window vibrating on my cheek from the motion of the car and it only helped to lull me into a nap. I was still thinking about Patch's lips when I fell asleep.

* * *

"Lexi, baby, we're here." Patch said as he shook me awake.

I didn't want to leave my comfy seat, but I had something new and important to address.

"Did you just call me baby?" I asked cheerfully.

"Uh, yes." He said almost nervously. _Patch, nervous? HA!_

"Good." I flashed him a smile. "Now, where are we?"

Patch, happy to be back on track, took out a blindfold from the backseat.

"What is that?" I questioned trying to remain calm. I knew he wasn't going to hurt me, but I really detested surprises.

"Hush, hush. You're going to be fine." He tied to blind fold around me face. "Now stay still and I'll come around and get you out.

"No, I'm going to get out myself." I grumbled.

"Don't give me attitude or I'll take you back to school young lady." He joked.

"Yes, sir!"

With both of us laughing, it was pretty hard for Patch to get my out of the car with the blindfold on. He managed though, and led me in a straight line while ordering me not to peek.

"I'm not going to Patch! Just tell me what it is already"

"Patch you're walking too slowly, I'll never get there at this rate!"

And my whines went on and on like that until he swooped me up in to his arms, the darn blindfold staying on, and he jog-walked to wherever we were going.

I heard a faint click and the sound of something opening, and felt Patch set me down.

"Now you can look." He said proudly.

I took off the blindfold (_finally_) and looked around me.

There was a set of couches on one side of the room, a living area I assumed, and on the other was a kitchen most women would give their right arms for, that looked like it had never been used. I was in a house?

Confused I turned and looked at Patch who was looking down at me with so much pride, like he had shown me his prize winning horse, that I had to laugh.

"Where are we, I mean, I know this is a house, but what are we doing here?"

He turned me around to face him and kissed me, just for a second, before he replied.

"This is my house. You're the first woman who has ever been here, some of my fellow fallen angels, the ones I can stand, have been here. But you're the first human to be here, and the first person I've kissed here."

Suddenly understanding his meaning, I jumped up at him, hooking my legs around his hips and placing my arms around his neck.

"Oh, Jev!" I squealed delighted as I buried my neck in his shoulder.

I knew I had kept nothing about myself from him, and this just proved he had done the same with me.

"Lexi." He breathed into my hair.

It was in that instant that I felt my heart about to burst. I pulled my face away from his neck only to attach it to his face. I kissed him so passionately and fierce I caught him off-guard and he nearly dropped me. He recovered and kissed me back twice as hard. His tongue entered my mouth and swirled around my own tongue, eliciting a moan from me. I could feel him smile against my mouth as he led me down the hall. Still connected, I felt him drop me. I started to scream until I noticed there was a bed underneath me.

He pulled away for a minute looking at me warily. As if to ask me if this was okay. This only inspired me more and I pulled his shirt towards me on the bed. He landed on top of me lightly, his hands near my shoulders holding him up. I giggled slightly, on some sort of a high from just being near Patch, and he moved his kiss away from my mouth to my neck. I shivered slightly and that was enough motivation for him to continue. He placed kisses at the top of my neck all the way down to my thighs, trailing his tongue along for good measure. I had never gotten anywhere with anyone else before, and I was already giving myself to Patch.

"You didn't bring me here just to…to do this, did you?" I asked in between heavy breaths and slight moans.

He looked up at me, stopping the sensations that were hitting me at every part of my body, and I couldn't say I was pleased.

"No. I brought you here to give you all of me; this is the last piece of the puzzle that is Patch Cipriano and I wanted to share it with you." He told me gently.

"Oh." was all that I could say before I pulled his mouth back to mine.

His hands grazed my back under my shirt and I shivered again. Everything about Patch heightened my senses and made me more aware. He moved his hand up taking my shirt with it, until the green long sleeve tee was on the floor. He moved down to my jeans next, hesitating before he unzipped them.

"Are you sure?" His eyes penetrated mine looking for an honest answer.

"Yes." I whispered back. In all of my life I had never wanted anything more than this. I wanted to be Patch's and I wanted him to be mine.

My jeans eventually landed on the carpet next to my shirt and he stared at me.

"You are so beautiful Lexi Thomas."

I was in the process of turning bright red again when he tore off his own clothes. I stared at him like the angel he was. He was so insanely beautiful and handsome I felt tiny and insecure. His muscles were hard and his skin was the most glorious color of a golden caramel all over. He kissed me once more, the sweetest, most gentle kiss, and looked me in the eyes.

The expression that I had always found so unreadable was so obvious now, because it mirrored my own perfectly.

It was love.

* * *

Patch laid back down in the bed after putting his boxers back on and I had my undergarments back in place.

He looked at me and brushed a few hairs back in place before leaning in to give me a soft peck on the cheek. He smiled the brightest smile and all I could do was mimic it.

"Alexis." I said softly.

"What baby?" he inquired.

"My full name is Alexis Marie Thomas."

"Why-" he started, not being able to finish before I could answer.

"That's my real name. Now you know everything. Now you've had all of me."


	9. Bonus Chapter- Breathtaking

**BONUS CHAPTER:**

_**I realized (after someone mentioned in the comments) that I hadn't shown why Lexi didn't know that Hush, Hush (by wonderful Becca Fitzpatrick) was a supernatural novel. In my mind, of course I knew, but for all of my lovely readers out there, I wanted to show you just how she came to get her hands on this story she is now a part of. This chapter takes place a day or two before the story starts. I hope you all enjoy this bonus chapter and I promise, I will continue the story tomorrow or the day after. Thank you to all of my loyal readers! R&R please!**_

* * *

"Good afternoon Ms. Thomas" Mrs. Gilchrest smiled at me through the top of her reading glasses. She was the only librarian at my school who actually read the novels before placing them on the shelves, and who remembered students' names.

"Hello!" I said in my loudest whisper. I wasn't always a rule follower, but the library was the one place I respected enough to follow the guidelines. It was a safe haven of sorts for me, a calm in the storm that was my life.

"Oh, we have some wonderful new books for you to read, dear!" she quietly pointed a bookmark in the direction of the "New Novels" section. As if she didn't know that I always went there first every day after school.

"Thank you!" I grinned.

As I walked to my usual area I felt giddy with anticipation. I always felt that way before getting a new book. Books were always constant, no matter what they had a beginning, a middle, and an end. There was always going to be a resolve and, most likely, a happy ending. I hoped the same for my life.

"If only my life was like a book…" I mumbled finally reaching the stand of books I was aiming for.

I browsed, checking each cover and their summaries. Mrs. Gilchrest had obviously done a lot of reading the past weekend, there were about twenty new books to choose from. _Maybe she finally enlisted some help_, I thought. I grabbed a book about a young woman going through a tough time and finding love, much like all of the rest I read, and turned to head for checkout. That's when it caught my eye. There was a novel, no thicker or smaller than the rest, no bright colors, nothing that would really stick out in anyone else's eyes, but it captured my attention.

I reached down a little to pick it up off the middle row of the metal rack, and brushed my fingers along the title.

Hush, Hush by_ Becca Fitzpatrick_

I definitely hadn't heard of her before, but the cover was so beautiful. It was breathtaking. The mixture of grays and blacks and whites on it gave it a deeper feel, almost like you could reach into the cover and become part of the story. The man on the cover looked torn apart, with some sort of feathers (wings?) being ripped off of him.

Mesmerized, I stared at the cover, my fingers just barely touching the picture of the man.

"Ms. Thomas, are you alright?"

I jumped about half a mile, feeling as though I had been caught doing something very bad.

_I didn't do anything_, I reminded myself.

"I'm fine. Have you- Have you read this before?" I pointed to the novel that I was so transfixed on.

"Oh yes! I was recommended it, I had some help reading the others before putting them out, but this one I finished myself. It was quite good, a little out of your element, though. You know, a bit out there." Mrs. Gilchrest was interrupted by the library phone ringing. "I have to go take that, sorry dear." She said as she scurried away to see who was calling.

Without hesitating, I picked up the book. It didn't feel weird or different in my hands, I don't know why I thought it would, but I could tell if anything it was going to be a great read. It would be so good to get out of my head for a little bit. This past month had been so hard at home, Patrick and Sally were constantly arguing and I wasn't even sure what it was over. The other kids were all affected by this, the babies were crankier and the others were either silent or verbally fighting. As usual, I just retreated to my bed, pulling a book on my lap as I slid under my covers and blocked out the world.

My thoughts were starting to jumble, thinking about fighting parents led me to thinking about the night they had their accident. I hated thinking about that night. Everyone around, no matter where I was located, seemed to know my parents died in a car crash, but no one knows I was in the car. I remember the rain flooding the road, the bright lights coming from the long direction, there was a lot of spinning, or maybe it was flipping, and screaming. I was ten at the time, so I knew I should have remembered it all better, but I couldn't. I remember my mom and dad shouting, but I couldn't remember what.

Shaking my head, trying to erase my thoughts like I would a picture on an Etch-A-Sketch, I walked forward to the checkout counter with the two books I had picked out.

"You decided to read it? You're going to love it!" Mrs. Gilchrest squealed. She was older than middle aged with dark hair that was graying in some areas, but her enthusiasm could compete with some of my fellow peers.

"I hope so. Who recommended it to you?" I asked trying to make small talk.

Mrs. Gilchrest's face lit up like a tree on Christmas and I knew I had said the wrong thing.

"Didn't I tell you? We got a new aid that comes in the weekends! His sister said this was the best book she had read in a long time! You know, he is single, and maybe around your age…." She wiggled her eyebrows and winked at me.

The last time that sweet librarian tried to set me up with someone (knowing how quiet and introverted I had always been), she had given me a man's number, forcing me to call it in front of her. When he finally answered and agreed to meet at the library the next day it was clear he was well over six years older than me. He was her son's friend. I had to politely decline, making up an excuse about needing to bake cupcakes the next day. I vowed after that that taking her advice on dating was not a good idea.

"No thank you." I smiled politely.

"Fine, fine. Here are your books, and try not to finish them so fast, you have to explore the outside world too young lady." _Ah, sweet Mrs. Gilchrest always trying to get me to go outside, as if. _

I smiled again and grabbed my books, heading out the door to a cloudy Maine day. It dawned on me I hadn't even read the inside flap to find out what Hush, Hush was supposed to be about, but it was too late now. I had a project due the next day so I wouldn't have time to read tonight.

Sighing, I dropped the books in my backpack and made my way to my car.

The whole way home I was hoping and praying that all of the fighting had finally subsided and I would be able to live in a peaceful environment at last.

_Fat chance of that_, I thought.

Oh, how right I had been.


	10. Chapter 9

_"Hello! So I'm thirty minutes late on my promise, but I'm already working on my next chapter! I hope you all enjoy this chapter, let me know what you think! This chapter is a bit more risque than my others, and it does involve underage drinking, so if you aren't about that then I am sorry! Look to the bottom for another author's note as I don't want to ruin this chapter! Read and review, thanks everyone! To all of my fans and reviewers thank you so much for all of the encouragement it helps motivate me so much! Oh, and I got a request doing a Patch's P-O-V chapter, and I will get to that but after the story is over I'll have a series of Bonus Chapters from his POV! Alright, here you go!"_

**"Love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right." ~Taylor Swift, State of Grace, Album:RED**

After the initial bliss of giving myself to Patch wore off, I was left with a bigger feeling of shock. I'd like to say it was a happy feeling and that I thought it was a smart decision, but it wasn't.

Stupid, stupid, stupid, I groaned to myself.

"What's the matter?" asked the nearly perfect man lying next to me.

I flung myself out of the bed, muttered a simple 'nothing', grabbed my clothes off the floor while searching for my dignity (to no avail), and went to find the bathroom.

After I had successfully located the restroom, I locked the door and fell against the back of it.

_Holy crap Lexi, how stupid can you be?_ One part of me asked; starting an internal argument that seemed it would never be resolved.

_It wasn't stupid, I lo-…like him!_

_Were you about to the say L word you silly girl?_

_No?_

_HA! He tried to kill you and then told you he was an angel, is that why you just did that? Is that why you handed away the one thing you had to yourself that was safe and secure and fully in your control?_

_You don't know what you're talking about!_

_Sure I do, I'm you._

As that last thought set in, I was sure I was either crazy or someone was pulling my strings like a puppet. That's when something big clicked in my head. I'd say it was as near to an actual light bulb going off above me as it could get.

With my new conviction, and my clothes, in place I stalked back to the bedroom where Patch was still relaxing in his bed, looking like he had just been told he'd won the lottery. He had this huge grin on his face and it looked so silly on him. He usually wore a grim expression with the knowledge of a very long lifetime painted on his face. All of that seemed gone now, and I almost felt sorry for having to pop his happy bubble.

"Aha!" I yelled like a detective in a childish cartoon who had just unraveled the villain's sinister plan.

Patch shot up with lightning fast reflexes and for a minute I thought he was actually startled, until I remembered he was a fallen angel.

"Lexi, what?" he asked with an amused expression in his eyes.

"Don't 'what' me Patch." I spat his name out like it was poisonous, and for me it was, it affected me in ways I didn't understand.

He shot me a confused look and I continued on with my dramatic monologue, or as most would put it, babbling.

"I get it now. I really get it. I mean, it all makes sense now. I never got attached to anyone; my closest friend was a librarian for crying out loud. Then you, you came along and…" I searched for a word, "you frazzled me and fried my brain! I thought maybe something was wrong with me, why would I want to be friends with a murderer, because that essentially is what you are." I laughed almost maniacally before resuming, not daring to look him in the eyes. "I mean, why you told me about your mind control powers when you were using them on me, I don't understand. But at least everything is clear again. I can't figure out why you wanted to use me though, why convince my mind that I liked you? Just so you could take my virginity? Is that a part of the sacrifice thing you were trying to do? I couldn't be pure or something? Whatever it is, just stay away from me, I figured it out and I'm not letting you near me anymore. Find some other person to hurt because I'm too smart for this crap. I'm going to find a way to leave and then I'm gone for good. You can kill or convince Nora to sleep with you after she comes back and everything will be as it should." I finished taking in a deep breath, not realizing I had run out of air.

I brought my eyes back up to Patch where I found not an angry Patch, or a smug one, or even a scary one, but a wounded one.

_You hurt him?_ I asked myself silently.

_But, shouldn't he be mad I figured out his plan, or maybe angry that I wasn't blissfully ignorant anymore? _

I tugged on my light brown hair subconsciously, knowing it was the first time I had done so since I was little. I used to do it when my real parents were in the middle of giving me a lecture, or when they had caught me doing something wrong.

What happened next was not something I expected; Patch got up from the bed very slowly and strode towards where I was standing. I retreated and ended up against a wall. He put both of his arms on the wall next to where my body was securing me there. I knew there was no way to escape, he was faster and stronger. His eyes searched my face looking for something and I didn't know what.

_This is it._

_What?_ _Uh oh, that wasn't my voice. Did I say my last thought out loud? I_ looked up at Patch as he towered over me with that pained expression still on his face.

"You're- you're going to kill me now right?" I gulped. I had no clue what I was saying at this point, I don't even think my mind was registering the words before my mouth was spitting them out.

"Lexi." He said sharply before pushing away from me. "If you think I'm going to kill you, you really need to leave. Now."

I blinked back tears, confused as to why my heart hurt so much when logically everything finally made sense. There was no way my past actions over the last few days had been my own. Lexi Marie Thomas did not sleep with random people, especially murderers.

_He's not a killer though, is he?_

_SHUT UP!_ I screamed at my traitorous thoughts.

Swallowing my tears I made my way through the house, ignoring the nagging feeling that was telling me I was doing the wrong thing, and found my dignity at the door. Probably right where I had left it.

Relieved we had taken my car, I got in the driver's seat and headed back for my house before a brilliant idea popped up in my mind. I pulled into the nearest gas station and flipped open my phone (there was no way I was calling someone while I was driving, not after what happened to my mom and dad). I fought back another wave of sadness and dialed my 'best friend's' number.

"Lexi, where were you today?! Your mom is going to be so mad if she finds out you skipped!" Vee shouted through the phone.

"Long story, and I don't feel like talking right now. Tell me we have something to do tonight!" I hadn't noticed earlier, but today was Friday. Surely even people in this town had parties.

"I like the way you think girl! Call your mom, tell her you're studying with me at home and you'll need to sleepover and meet me at my house." I smiled at her cooperation.

"Done." I snapped the phone shut. I was really starting to like this Vee and I really didn't want to think about Patch.

I called my mom and gave her my story and she instantly okayed everything. I had a feeling Nora wasn't one to get into trouble.

When I finally got to Vee's house I found myself flung into her room where she had laid out what looked like a whole store on her bed. Looking at all of the clothes I noticed they were all incredibly form-fitting and short. I smiled to myself, happy I had worn my best bra and panty set.

"Pick an outfit, slut yourself up, and let's go! I found an awesome party, some new kid named Elliot told me about it. Apparently the kid is rich too, so there will be more to drink then water if you catch my drift." She winked at me and grabbed a few pieces of clothing to change into. My eyes were drawn to one piece in particular, a thin black dress that looked like it would reach about mid-thigh. I took that one and headed to the bathroom.

It was hard to put it on, and I had no idea with her curves how Vee could fit in it, but I didn't question her.

As soon as I walked back into the room, my friend whistled and winked at me.

"We won't be keeping the boys away tonight, huh?"

In truth she looked pretty hot herself, in a red one shoulder shirt and tight black skirt. We were two ordinary girls that looked like we were out to audition for Playboy.

She put some make up on me, loving the chance to doll me up, and threw a pair of shoes about 8 inches high my way.

"I can't wear these; I'll fall on my face!" I shrieked.

"You can and you will." She stated in a no-nonsense tone. The more I hung around her, the more I loved her.

I strapped my shoes on, wobbling but successfully staying upright as she put on her matching stilettos. In a flash we were out the door, in her car, and on the way to this mysterious party.

And I couldn't wait.

* * *

The sound of club music and thumping of the base could be heard from outside of the huge house that greeted us as we stepped out of the car. It had been about a good half hour drive, but it looked to be worth it. Outside we noticed a few underage smokers, some we recognized, but most we didn't. Elliot had mentioned to my wonderful friend that there was going to be a mix of people attending. We marched up the steps and into the somewhat intimidating home.

There were more than just a few people there. It looked like the whole teenage population of Maine was present.

_Just what I need to get my mind off of a certain bad boy. _

Looking around I noticed a lot of people were staring at Vee and I, I sent her a questioning glance.

"Relax Lex, we look hot." She said. I loved the nickname she had given me.

"I need a drink." I muttered. There was no way I could make it through the night with all of this attention without being a bit inebriated.

"Done." She winked at me.

I watched in awe as Vee marched up to the nearest boy, pointed to me, flashed him an award winning smile, and then pointed to what I assumed was the kitchen. The boy took off in a flash and Vee sauntered back to me.

"What did you just do?" I asked amazed.

"Oh honey, it is so easy to get male attention as long as they don't know you. Or go to the same school as you." I was sure she was correct now because the guys at our school weren't the least bit interested in her, although that never stopped her. I didn't understand, she was curvy and gorgeous, and if I was playing for the other team she would be my first choice. I told her as much earlier too.

The boy, James I think Vee said, came back to us, two red cups in hand. I looked at him and suddenly I knew I was mistaken. This was no boy, he was all man.

_Kind of like Patch. _

_Enough. About. Patch._ I thought angrily.

I took one of the cups from him, not caring what was in it, and chugged it. I know this was wrong, it could have been drugged and it wasn't smart to drink while being underage, but I just didn't care. I had given my V-card to a man I barely knew today because he mind controlled me to. At this point, being drugged was the least of my worries.

"I like a girl who can hold her liquor." James said to me with a grin.

Already feeling warm and a bit braver I put on my flirtiest smile. I just wanted to get over Patch and this man looked fine enough to do it with, and he sure didn't have to know I was a complete lightweight when it came to drinking.

"Would you mind getting me another?" I batted my eyelashes at him.

He took off again and Vee watched me sipping her drink casually.

"Want to tell me what happened today?" she asked innocently, though I knew she knew something big had happened.

"No."

Luckily, she didn't push me further. This was good because…John I think, was back with my drink. Except this time he had been smart enough and brought two for me.

I threw them both back and they were equally as delicious as the first one, which was to say, not at all tasty.

"Want a tour?" he asked to only me.

I looked at Vee and she winked at me as if to say 'go ahead'.

"Sure" I had already begun slurring my words.

He took me by the hand and I giggled, feeling positively giddy for the first time since I was probably 5.

_I love alcohol so, so much_. I thought with great joy.

Jimmy finally walked me through the first level of the house and was leading me up the stairs when we passed a tray of, what else, Jell-O shots. I grabbed two and he chuckled taking one for himself. I felt happy I ended up with the host of the party.

I downed them both instantly and was pleased to find out they were much better than the first unknown beverage.

He was showing me around the top floor when we finally came to what I was sure was his bedroom. He glanced at me shyly and said I probably didn't want to go in there. This only made me braver.

_I bet Patch would know that. _

I pinched myself for my wandering mind.

I took Jake's hand and dragged him in the room. He seemed surprised, but pleased all the same. When I took a look around and assessed it was completely normal for a teenage boy (movie posters, clutter, dirty clothes, etc…) I threw him down on the bed.

I wasn't really prepared to do anything, but I mean, my virtue had already been stolen, why not have a little fun?

Straddling Jim (what the heck was his name?) I pressed my lips to his. It was very unusual, like what I imagined kissing one of my foster brothers would have been like. It was warm, sloppy, and uncomfortable. But it was better than…**_him_**.

Laughing at my loose inhibitions I rolled over on the bed. Jim took that as a positive signal and got on top of me.

All of a sudden I felt a wave of nausea.

"I have to go." I blurted, shoving Jason off of me and taking off without another word.

I didn't even hear what he had to say, I just ran downstairs hoping to find Vee, my ride, so we could go back to her house.

I looked for an hour, or what felt like an hour as I was being groped by strangers the whole time, when I decided to call her. That's when I noticed my vision was blurry. I pressed a few buttons, but I kept hitting the wrong ones, so I scrolled through my contacts. I saw it, the name I had been trying to avoid for the evening, and something in me made me press the call button next to it.

"What?" the voice snapped.

I giggled.

_Nice witty response, Lexi._ I told myself, but in all honesty I didn't care.

"Alexis, where are you?" Patch sounded more like a guardian than he did a lover.

_Ha, guardian, guardian angel. _I snorted.

"Alexis are you there?" he asked more impatiently.

"Of course I'm here, I'm not home yet silly. I can't go home. No, no, no." I said sounding pretty ridiculous in retrospect.

"ARE YOU DRUNK?!" The voice yelled angrily. It was the first time I had heard Patch really angry. It should have scared me, but all I could do was giggle some more.

"Maybe, unless you mind controlled me to think this party happened?" I laughed. I had no idea what the heck was so funny, but I guess it was better than being an angry drunk.

"Party?" he groaned. I could tell he was frustrated and was probably pulling an annoyed face even through the phone, even after everything, and even in my inebriated state, I still knew him almost as well as myself.

"Lexi, I need you to tell me where you are."

"Yes, sir!" I saluted to no one, which made me crack up all over again.

"Lexi!" he commanded, and I was suddenly thankful he couldn't use his powers over the phone.

"At a party with Vee! We're getting wild! Whoooooo!" I shouted like I was in a bad Girls Gone Wild spoof. People coming out of the party were starting to look at me weird, well the ladies were anyways. I could tell the guys were sizing up just how drunk I was and if they would be able to convince me to go home with them. I only knew so much because I kept getting whistled at and someone had the audacity to slap my butt. If I was sober I would have been furious but I hadn't felt more free in years.

"Oh my god. How much did you consume?" I laughed at his word choice, seriously who talked like that?"

"Just one. Almost. His name was Jimmy, or John, or something." I laughed at my little joke. Much to my inappropriate pleasure, he didn't think it was funny.

He growled a low primal sound that made me want to suck his face off. What can I say? I wasn't a classy individual when I had my beer goggles on.

"I meant alcohol." He said.

"Five." I smiled with pride. I was amazed I hadn't passed out yet, or thrown up.

"Five what?"

"Three funny drinks, they were in red cups, and they were awful. But then I had two Jell-O shots and they made up for the crummy taste of the others."

"Do you realize you could have been drugged, that you could be drugged right now?! If you don't tell me where you're at, I swear to all that is holy you will regret it."

I thought his last threat was hilarious and I doubled over in laughter, falling to the ground in the process, which made everything even funnier.

"LEXI!" Patch barked through the phone, obviously very annoyed with me.

"Sorry. Geez, who peed in your oatmeal?" I proceeded to tell him the address after I found out from a girl. He didn't even say bye, he just hung up.

"Grumpy." I sighed.

_Why the heck did I even call him? I hate him!_

_No you don't_. A voice in my head sneered.

I was really starting to despise my internal conflicts.

Less than five minutes later a big black hummer pulled up near where I was standing. Confused, and still tipsy, I flicked the person off and told them to go around me.

"Get away! I'm waiting for my knight in shining armor to pick me up on his horse!" I screamed at the car.

I was really starting to regret alcohol.

I regretted it even more when I saw Patch get out of the Hummer smirking.

Oh, dear lord, kill me now.

"Sorry, it's no horse, but it'll get you to where you need to be." He grinned, but his eyes remained blank and emotionless.

I was staring at him, really happy I was so far gone that I didn't care if he noticed me checking him out. He was so perfect looking.

Oh my god, I had sex with that, I remembered. A blush appeared on my face and betrayed my deepest thoughts.

"Lexi, can we get you home now?" He asked and reached for my hand when I pulled away.

"Can'tgohomenowMomwouldknow." I mumbled incoherently.

His eyebrows shot up wanting a replay of what I had said.

"My 'mom' thinks I've been studying with Vee." I sighed.

"Ah." Was all he replied.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, everything around me was starting to blur together. I tried to take a step towards Patch's monstrous vehicle, and surprise, surprise, I failed. My heel caught on the gravel I had moved to and I fell forwards, and just like all of the times before, Patch caught me.

"Why the hell would you wear shoes like that if you were going drink? Do you have a death wish?" he asked.

"Vee said they made me look sexy." I pouted.

Patch shook his head and picked me up in his arms. I tried to hide my pleased expression by wrapping my arms loosely around his neck and burying my head in his shoulder.

I wasn't going to admit to him or me that this was where I wanted to be all day.

"I'm such a loser!" I exclaimed before clamping my hand over my mouth.

"What?" he asked in an uninterested voice.

_Of course he's uninterested you big buffoon_, I told myself silently, _you called him a murderer and accused him of forcing you to have sex. _

"Nothing." I mumbled into the crack between his shoulder and neck.

He set me down in the Hummer and buckled me in, then moved to his side and did the same for himself.

He sat quietly in the Jeep for a while before turning to me.

"Why are you doing this?" he asked almost quietly.

It was in this minute I hated going to the party the most.

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT I THINK I LOVE YOU!" I shouted at him.

**_Oh. My. Freaking. God. _**

_Did I just say that, was I insane?_

I knew Patch for three or four days, and while we had been through a lot, and I felt like I knew him for years, I still didn't want to admit anything. Maybe it was just from having sex, I mean, even if it was his idea and he put it in my mind, maybe it was just one of those things that happened when your virginity was taken.

I had no idea what was happening, I was bright red, Patch was harboring some kind of expression that meant who knows what, and I had just blurted out my deepest thoughts.

I was supposed to be strong, I was supposed to be independent, and most of all I was supposed to be smart. This made me none of those things. I had always convinced myself there was no God, there was no Fate, or Destiny, and there was no such thing as Soul-mates. If there were, why would my life be so tragic?

And that's when it hit me; maybe everything had happened so I could be here, in this moment, with Patch.

I looked at him, "say something." I squeaked out in a small voice.

_Nothing sobers you up like a declaration of love_, I thought.

Patch turned to me, and I was scared. I had never been more terrified. Not even when he was chasing me through the house with a knife, or when I had given my body to him.

I was afraid because I had just handed him the one thing I guarded most in the world, my heart. It wasn't some post-intercourse confession, it was real and it was now.

I think I even whimpered slightly.

"Would you make up your mind?!" he said harshly.

I looked at him with surprise. I knew I behaved horribly earlier, but it wasn't my fault I was having word-vomit.

"Sorry." I muttered looking at my feet. "Forget it."

He sighed and took the steering wheel in his hand.

I couldn't do it, be in a car with him while my stupidity was gassing us out like poisonous fumes. I unclicked my seat belt, jumped out of the car, and ran. I knew Patch was fast, but he wasn't expecting me to abandon ship, and I knew I could make it back inside and hide among the masses. I only prayed I didn't break my ankle in the death-traps Vee called shoes.

I wanted to look for Vee, but I knew she was probably on ground level and I was positive that was where Patch would look for me, if he came looking that is. On my way in, I noticed Vee's car was gone and I suspected she went home after spying me with Patch.

I took the stairs two by two, which was extremely difficult, but eventually made it to the top and secured myself in Jim's bedroom. I was very pleased to see he wasn't in there, and locked the door and made sure the window was closed.

I sat on the bed feeling dirty and disgusting as I recalled the events of earlier that day.

First, I had sex with Patch, then I called him a murderer, said he tricked me into having sex with him, left him, went to a party with Vee, got drunk at said party, made out with a stranger, called Patch, told him I loved him, ran off, and hid in my kissing partner's bedroom. It had been quite a busy day.

I heard the doorknob moving, and then heard a knocking.

"Whoever is in my bedroom better not be doing it on my bed!" called the angry voice.

Oh thank goodness, it was just Jim.

I unlocked the door, opened it, and pulled him inside. I locked it again of course but not before I noticed Patch at the top of the stairs, his eyes directly on me.

"What the-?" Jim exclaimed before realizing who was tugging him inside.

His eyes finally fell on me.

"Oh. Did you want to carry on where we left off? I get that you weren't feeling well so no hard feelings." He said coming towards me.

I felt really uneasy and knew Patch was probably listening outside of the door.

I let my thoughts over take me, I really had two options, make out with this guy and hope Patch left or make the guy get out and let Patch come inside, and if Patch came in, I would have to talk. Suddenly, making out with Jackson felt like the right thing to do if it meant avoiding my feelings.

I let him come near me, he was so close, and he then he put his mouth on mine. It wasn't like before, I wasn't as drunk or happy, it was all wrong. He started to put his hand under my shirt and that's when I had to stop it.

"No." I told him pushing him away. "I'm sorry, I can't."

"Relax." He said, approaching me. This time he put all of his weight on me and I had a hard time moving. He was very tall and had a lot of muscle on him.

"No. Stop. Get off." I said winded.

"Are you kidding me?" he asked cruelly and I flinched.

"I'm sorry."

"Stupid tease." He looked at me venomously and pushed me back into a bookcase.

All of my thinking hurt too much, the music was too loud, and my feet were too sore. I collapsed to the ground not caring that my dress had probably ridden up.

Jake looked at me one last time, probably deciding I was worth about as much as the dirt under his shoe, and left. He looked at Patch who still stood outside of the door and pushed on through the crowd never giving it a second thought.

Patch entered the room, and for the fourth time that night, the door was locked. He pulled me up into his arms again and placed me on the bed.

He laid me down rather nicely and then pulled my dress down which only happened to expose more of my cleavage.

"Dammit Lexi, what are you wearing?" he glared at me.

"I wanted to be sexy." I said, too concentrated on the pain I felt to worry about telling anymore lies.

"Why?" he asked as he took a seat next to me.

"I wanted to prove that I could feel just as good with somebody else."

He laughed. He literally laughed at me.

With a newfound confidence I narrowed my eyes at him and snapped.

"And I did. You missed it unfortunately, but it was quite the show." I prayed he hadn't heard me telling John no. I hated feeling this way, so dependent on a man.

He growled like he had earlier, only this time I was able to look at his facial expression. He rolled over and pushed me down into the bed where I was underneath him.

My eyes widened, a little taken aback, and he smirked.

"What did you do with him Lexi? Did you give yourself to him?" he asked, already knowing the answer. Regardless, his tone, while angry, was making me kind of….hot.

"N-no." I stammered.

"Did he see you, all of you?"

I shook my head.

"But he wanted to." I pointed out kind of weakly.

"Everyone here wants to, Lexi, even some of the girls. You can't leave the house looking like this ever again, but you're free to dress in private like this for me." He smirked.

His face was so close to mine, and I could feel the heat emanating off of his body. I had no idea how the idea had gotten there, if it was my own or if he had placed it there, but I really wanted him to kiss me or even touch me.

He rolled back and sat up again. I held in a sigh of discontent. It was weird to see him so protective, but I liked it, a lot, especially because he being protective of me.

I sat up as well, in a very unladylike manner for what I was wearing, and just looked at him. He looked back at me and for a minute I thought I saw desire cloud his eyes. Then he just stood up, held out a hand, and pulled me to my feet.

"I think we should get you out of here." He said.

"Okay."

"Are you going to be able to walk down the stairs?" he asked calmly.

"I don't know." I answered honestly. I took a step forward and almost face planted. Tonight had definitely caught up with me.

"I'll just carry you." He sighed.

"Fine, but don't think I enjoy being some damsel in distress or something!" I argued.

Patch remained silent but carried me down the stairs, out of the house, and to the Jeep as he had earlier.

We kept our car ride extremely silent, I even tried to quiet my breathing, and eventually we made it to our destination. I didn't want to get out of the car, I didn't want to go with him and explain myself. But I knew I had to. I owed that to him. I just hoped I didn't go spewing any more than I had to, but I was having trouble with that.

_Here goes nothing_, I thought to myself as he put the Hummer in park and turned off the engine.

* * *

_"Slight A/N here: I just wanted to say there will be strong themes of destiny/fate throughout this series, so please don't bit my head off on the whole "she loves him" stuff :) It will all be revealed in the end, and everything will make sense. And if you don't believe in true love, or love at first sight, or any of that stuff, then keep that point of view. I'm not saying anything is for certain, I'm just saying, it will be brought up a little especially in the coming chapters. Next chapter soon!"_


	11. Chapter 10

We ended up back at Patch's place which I knew was probably the safest bet. I couldn't go home, and I definitely didn't want to go to Vee's and suffer an interrogation.

I let him lead me to the front door like I had that morning, except it was under a different pretense. There was nothing happy or sweet about this meeting.

Once we arrived inside, Patch left me near in the entrance and made his way to his couch. He flopped down and rubbed his face with his hands, he was obviously tired, stressed out, and annoyed.

"I'm sorry." I said. He only motioned for me to sit across from him on the other sofa.

"We need to talk Lexi, without any innuendos, jokes, rude comments, or anything like that. It needs to be a serious conversation, and I need you to be honest." He said bluntly.

"Okay." I replied suddenly obsessed with a little hangnail on my left hand.

"Lexi, I'm serious. Can you at least look at me?"

"Fine! What do you want to know?" I replied back rudely, I was so tired being tongue-tied and nervous around him.

"I'm not even sure where to start."

"The obvious choice would be to start at the beginning." I rolled my eyes. Okay, I really had to get my post-alcohol attitude in check.

"There's no need to act like that. Fine. We'll start at the beginning, where you seem to think that I 'mind tricked' you into sleeping with me. Care to explain when and why you came up with that?" Patch snapped.

I took a deep breath, he wanted honesty, well then he was going to get it.

"It's so clear that's what happened. Patch I've known you for four days and I've held on to my virginity through countless of new cities and families and schools to give it to you so soon? No offense, it's not that I'm saying you aren't worthy, I'm just saying this isn't me. I just met you. Everything's been happening way too fast. I wouldn't do something like that. When I went to put my clothes back on, well, that's when it all made sense. It just wasn't me, which meant it had to be you."

"I can't believe you think I'd do that." He murmured looking worse than hurt, then something new came over him and he looked positively angry. "And you could convince yourself that that's what happened all because you don't want to admit your feelings, right?"

My head was pounding and I wasn't sure if it was from everything I had drunk or from thinking so hard.

"What, feelings? Patch, I don't know what you're talking about, I just…I just….I-" Patch cut me off with a sharp look.

"Lexi, stop. Today was amazing, and then it was ruined. Why do you keep doing this? I told you I was in this with you! Why can't you believe that?"

"IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE, OKAY?!" I screamed not caring who heard.

"What doesn't?"

"All of it. It's been four days Patch, FOUR. This cannot be happening. I feel like I'm stuck in a Taylor Swift song or something." I groaned putting my hands over my face.

"Do you believe in fate or destiny?" he asked earnestly.

"No."

"Why?"

"With what happened to my parents, what my life has been like, what I've seen people go through, do you really think I believe in that crap?"

"Yes, I do. I believe you do but you don't want to. You believe me when I say I'm a fallen angel, it's no different." He said as if everything was crystal clear.

"It's pretty different." I grumbled.

"If I'm fallen, then that means that I was an angel, if I was an angel, that means that there's a god, right?"

"I guess." He was making perfect sense, but why did he always have to be right?

"So just say it's not weird to feel the way you do, the way we do, what do you feel? What happened tonight? You talk and then I'll talk." He sat expectantly with his hands folded in his lap. He looked a bit like a therapist, _(yeah, a sexy therapist_), but I shushed my thoughts so I could reply to him.

"Okay. I guess I'll start at the top and pretend like we've been romantically involved for a year or something so everything sounds less awkward…." I was stalling trying to figure out what to say, but Patch just sat in his seat waiting patiently. "So if you didn't control my mind then I guess that sex was my own idea. So after that happened, I just felt really overwhelmed, came to what I believed was the best conclusion, told you, left, and just happened to go to Vee's. I told my mom I was studying at her place and I would be spending the night and we decided to go out. I just wanted to take my mind off of you. We got dressed, and yes I put on her sluttiest outfit, but it made me feel, I don't know, powerful somehow." I shook my head, I must have seemed insane. "It was at some new guy's friend's house, the guy that was, uh, in the room with me. Anyway, we got there and the host started flirting with me, I can't remember his name, James or something? And I drank some. Okay, I drank a lot, it made me feel good. I felt happy and carefree and it made me forget about everything for a little while. James took me on a tour of his house and we….ended up in his room…do you want the abridged version?" I asked not wanting to hurt him or embarrass myself.

"No, I want the truth."

"Okay then, we ended up in his room, by that point I had had five drinks and I felt really loose. I pushed him down on the bed and got on top of him and made out with him." I said the last part at light-speed hoping he wouldn't catch it and think I was some sort of trollop. His eyes darkened and I knew he did hear it, all of it.

"Why would you do that?! I just don't understand, was it just about getting your first time out of the way so you could move on to others?" He questioned me critically and kind of loudly.

"NO! I did it because I wanted to stop thinking about you and my feelings for you. I wanted to see if maybe it was like this with everyone else. It wasn't, it was awful, so I rolled onto my back but he took that as an invitation to get on top and I pushed him off of me and ran out." I heard him let out a sigh of relief. "I ended up outside and went to call Vee but when I was looking for her name in the contacts, I saw yours, and for some insane reason, I wanted to call you. It was out of my control! I was super tipsy, I said stupid stuff, when I was outside I had a lot of people try to grope me or take me home, but I wasn't dumb enough for that. And you know the rest….."

"Well Lexi, I only know up until you dashed out of the Jeep like there was a fire."

"You're going to make me explain that?! AUGH. Fine! I ran out because I said the 'L' word. I sounded insane and to save myself from embarrassment I ran. When I got to the room, James tried to get in so I let him in, so you couldn't convince him to let you in. I kissed him hoping you would leave so I wouldn't have to talk, but it was so wrong." I shivered, feeling gross, "He tried to go farther, I put a stop to it, he called me a tease, pushed me, and that's how you found me."

"I don't understand why you were embarrassed, that's how you felt, and that's nothing to be ashamed of." He was going to continue when I cut him off.

"SHUT UP ALREADY! Stop talking to me like you're my father or something, talk to me like you're Patch, what are you thinking, start at the beginning. What happened with you today?"

"Fair enough, I guess. You want to know how I feel Lexi? This morning I was the happiest I've ever been, you know I can't feel physical, but I can feel emotional things, and that was the best feeling ever. And then you came out of the bathroom and accused me of forcing you to do that and then you thought I was going to kill you. If I had a heart I would have been heartbroken. You tore me to shreds. After you left I sat on my bed trying to make sure it had actually happened and I wasn't having a nightmare. I don't think I moved for five hours, or however long it took until you called me. At first I thought maybe you called me by accident, maybe you butt-dialed or something, but then it was apparent you were drunk. I got so angry. We were supposed to be in this together now, you said you gave me all of you, but you didn't and you were out there parading around ready to get taken advantage of. And then I picked you up, and you made a comment about waiting for a 'knight' and it made me angry. You didn't even want to be around me anymore, and now I was your hero? It didn't make sense, and then I saw what you were wearing." He eyed me again and I blushed. "You are hands down the sexiest thing I have ever seen, and you had been wearing that for other men to see! And then you tell me you were with another man, I just felt rage and jealousy. Then I finally get you in my car and you say you love me and then you bolt. And when I found you, you were with another man. What am I supposed to think about everything that's happened?! I just felt so angry, it was uncontrollable. What if he had hurt you or used you? He doesn't even care about you, I do." Patch was now pacing around his living room. I had never seen this side of him, he always came off as cool or cocky early on, and now he was laying everything out for me.

"Do you really like what I'm wearing?" I squeaked out looking at Patch from under my eyelashes. I know he had mentioned a lot more than that but I was done with having this heavy conversation.

"That's what you heard?" he smirked.

I nodded and grinned. He walked over to my chair and pulled me to my feet. He took a step back and admired every inch of me, I was torn between running and hiding behind the couch or jumping into his arms.

"I don't think I've wanted anything more than to rip that dress off of you right now."

I was definitely going to jump him alright. But I didn't get a chance to because in one long stride he connected the distance between us and brought his lips down to mine. It wasn't a sweet kiss, like our others had been, it was hungry and fiery and when I closed my eyes all I could see was red. He picked my legs up and locked them around his waist and I secured my arms around his neck. He held me like that until we reached the bedroom where he laid me down.

"Lexi, I need you to do something for me." He whispered against my neck.

"What?" I breathed. At that point, I'm pretty sure I would have done anything.

He cupped my face in his hands and placed a gentle kiss on my lips.

This can't be good.

"Forget about me. Focus on going home and stay out of trouble." He pulled back and I went to sit up, confused.

_I'm sorry_; he spoke softly in my mind. I opened my mouth to say something but no words came out. The room was spinning and Patch was blurring in with the rest of the surroundings. I tried to scream or cry out for help, but nothing happened.

_He won't hurt me_, I assured myself.

_Who won't?_ My inner voice questioned.

Everything was dark but the movement had stopped. I didn't know where I was or who I was with, but I felt lonely and abandoned.

_Crap, I'm supposed to be at Vee's. Why didn't she pick me up from the party?_

I looked down and noticed I was in Vee's bed. I guess she did pick me up.

When Vee and I woke up the next morning we simply looked at one another. The look was all it took to communicate that we were never speaking about last night, ever.

We giggled a little bit thinking about how crazy everything had been, and then decided to go shopping. We spent the whole weekend together moving from my house to hers, laughing at videos on the internet, watching movies, and trying on crazy outfits. It was so good to have a true friend; I never knew what that was like before. Things were really starting to look up.


	12. Quick Update!

**Just a quick update, sorry no new chapter yet!**

**Anyways, I wanted to let everyone know that I am planning on making this story into a trilogy called the 'Falling' series. Each story will include a new heroine falling into a book, each story will be different including different characters and different outcomes. **

**I wanted your inputs on the books the characters will fall into. I've already decided my next one will be the ****Fallen**** series by Lauren Kate. What should my last story be, ****The Mortal Instruments**** or ****The Infernal Devices**** (both by Cassandra Clare) or something else entirely. Review or message me what you think! I have this whole ****Hush, Hush**** story outlined, so don't worry, I will continue it shortly! I just have all of these ideas in my head!**

**So let me know what you think, the new chapter of this story will be out by Sunday or Monday! **

**Have a good weekend all! XoX**


	13. Chapter 11

_**A/N: Okay, so my 2nd story is up under Fallen, Lauren Kate called "Falling After Rapture". Here's the continuation of Lexi's story, and yes, I did all of the searching she did as if I was in her shoes. Another chapter should be posted tonight! Read, review, and subscribe. I love you all and thank you for all the inspiration!**_

Monday morning arrived too soon and I woke up with a groan. I had so much fun with Vee that I didn't want to go to school. Vee was lying next to me and she reacted the same as her alarm went off. I got up reluctantly and trudged over to Vee's closet; we had ended up at her house after falling asleep during a movie, and grabbed something off of a hanger without looking. I didn't care what I was going to wear, I just wanted the day to be done with already. I moved to go to the bathroom and change when I finally opened my eyes to look at what I had grabbed so I could match a pair of pants to it. It was a tight purple long sleeve V-neck shirt. I decided to grab a pair of my jeans I had worn and fixed myself up.

After I tossed my wavy hair into a high ponytail, put on some eyeliner, mascara, and lip gloss, Vee and I headed out to the car.

I mentioned to her that I was thinking about just going home after school, telling her I was tired, when in truth I wanted to do some digging regarding my situation.

I couldn't believe I found nothing out about how to get out of this reality.

Vee agreed and said that was probably best and we took separate vehicles.

We met up not twenty minutes later in the parking and headed to our lockers before going in different directions. School that day was nothing out of the ordinary, but something still felt off. Almost like I was missing a vital element of my day. I chalked it up to being inside of a book and carried on with my day.

* * *

Vee and I were finally able to meet up again in Biology where I sat at my empty table.

"Doesn't, uh…" _What was his name?_ "Patch sit here?"

"Yeah, but I don't think I've seen him for like a week. He probably got expelled or just, like, gave up. Don't worry about it."

The way she talked about him made it sound like he was one word: trouble. If that was the case, I could do with avoiding him. I got out my pens and notebook and started the work that the teacher had assigned.

Once school was finally finished I decided against going home. I headed to the library instead. If I arrived by coming through a book, maybe I could leave through the same one, or at least do some research.

* * *

The library was nice, it was a bigger building than the one I was used to back home, and the librarians certainly didn't look as friendly, but I still felt at ease. I scoured the aisles looking for the novel I came in, but it was nowhere to be found. I ended up in the paranormal section and ran head first into another body.

"Oof." I felt my head hit pure muscle.

"Sorry! You okay?" a man's voice called down to me.

I looked up and blushed.

_Of course you run into the attractive people Lexi_, I cursed myself.

"Sorry, my fault. I'm fine though, thank you." I tried to smile back.

"It's quite alright. I'm the new guy so I expect this won't be my last accident at this school."

I breathed a sigh of relief, if he was new that meant he wasn't a part of the popular group, well yet anyways. The last thing I needed right now was to have a group of jocks and cheerleaders verbally abusing me.

"I am such a klutz, I really am sorry." I said a little bit nicer this time. I nearly told him I was new as well but bit my tongue before it could betray me.

"Well, it's nice to meet you such-a-klutz, my name is Elliot." He held out a hand for me to shake.

"Ha-ha very funny. My name is Lexi."

"Pretty name for a pretty girl." I blushed. It was nice he was being so kind to me, but it just felt wrong.

"Thanks." I turned to leave.

"Wait, why don't you save me a seat at lunch tomorrow?"

I nodded my okay and left the library. Books may have gotten me in this situation but they weren't going to be able to get me out. It was time I embrace the twenty-first century and use my laptop that sat, collecting dust, on my desk at home. I had never been one for computers, especially when I could get my hands on a book instead. If I needed to spell something or look up a word I used a dictionary, if I wanted to write an essay, I wrote it by hand, and if I wanted information, I used reference and research books.

I made it home easily and turned on my computer, while it loaded I thought of keywords to search for. I pulled out a notepad and made a list.

Portals

Alternate Reality

Different Dimension

Magic

The list seemed like a good place to start so I typed the words into a search engine and clicked on the websites. I found various things for each topic and listed them next to the words. At the end of the search, my notebook looked like this:

Portals- music, video game, NASA discovering portals in the Earth's atmosphere, and weird kooky Church portal thing.

Alternate Reality- video games, no way to reach alternate realities.

Different Dimension- see Alt. Reality. Same?

Magic- Wiccans and Pagans, religions, YouTube videos dedicated to some kind of magic.

I slammed my head down on my desk, I had gotten nowhere fast. I continued to type in morbid phrases or words until, finally, one website caught my eye.

"Sacrifices- What They Have the Power to Do"

_Interesting_, I thought.

I clicked on the link and a page appeared with several tabs. I went through each one but they had nothing to do with my situation exactly. I stopped at one point, my mouse hovering over a tab that displayed "Angels, the Fallen, and Nephilim". My mouth dropped open and my body felt paralyzed. I had no clue what was going on in my brain, but it seemed so familiar. Like there was a word on my tongue that I couldn't get to come out of my mouth.

_This is all you've done to try and leave since you've been here and you're still coming up with nothing_, I told myself like the crazy person I was starting to feel like.

I yelled in anger and got up from the desk, throwing myself on my bed and tucking myself in. There was nothing more I could do. That night, thoughts of Angels danced in my head until sleep finally fell over me.


	14. Chapter 12

_**A/N: I'll write an extra long, detailed chapter tomorrow with some pretty significant events if I can get five reviewers. Any takers? Here you go, and enjoy! (Disclaimer- of course Becca Fitzpatrick owns all of Hush, Hush and its wonderful characters. I own Lexi, or Alexis, and I also own a really cute maltese named Danger. Back to the story though...**_

The next morning was the same as all of the others. I got up, wished my new-mother a good day, went to school, worked, and headed for lunch.

I got to lunch and saw Elliot waiting with Vee. I waved to them and brought my tray over. Vee scooted over a seat and I sat between her and Elliot.

"So how's your day been so far Lex?" she asked.

"Fine, you guys?" I didn't mention my research on sacrifices and portals.

Vee and Elliot both agreed their days had been pretty good before we all started in on our food. Cafeteria food was not very good back home, but this place made it look like a five star restaurant.

"So what are you guys going to be up to this weekend?" Elliot asked looking directly at me.

Vee nudged me under the table and gave me a huge smile. "I'm stuck at home, but I don't think Lexi's doing anything, are you Lexi?"

"Actually, I'm busy." I really didn't want to get hung up on the other sex right now when I had so much to figure out.

I picked up a piece of limp potato that I think the school was trying to pass for a French fry, when I saw a shadow in the cafeteria's window. I felt queasy for a minute, my nerves were kicking in again, and pushed the tray in front of me.

"Oh man, are you not going to eat that?" Elliot asked hopefully.

"Go for it." I murmured as I watched Vee and Elliot arguing over movies. "Actually, I think I'm going to go to the bathroom, I don't feel well." I declared and they nodded in acknowledgment.

I left the table and noticed the shadow still place on the outskirts of the window. I walked quickly hoping the stranger didn't get the feeling someone was onto them, but when I opened the doors to the outside everything was calm. I looked around but no one was in sight.

I sighed and walked to my locker, getting ready for my next class was better than pointless discussions.

* * *

I drove home that day enjoying the quiet. Vee had been following me around blabbing about Elliot and how we would make such an amazing couple, and I was tired of it. I couldn't make it more apparent that I wasn't interested unless I smacked him in the face.

When I reached the front door, I had that feeling again, something was wrong. I pulled the door open slowly and saw nothing. I walked up to my bedroom silently only to find my mother sitting at my desk. She turned to look at me and then unleashed her parental fury.

"Hello Lexi. I came up here today to use your computer for a minute when mine froze. You know what I saw, a page up about SACRIFICES! You want to explain that to me? Is something wrong? Do I need to schedule another appointment for Ms. Greene this week to go along with tomorrows?"

"Um, it was just a project for school. I'm fine." I mentally berated myself for leaving such a horrible window open. I also forgot about my therapist. She seemed nice enough when I met her, but she was still frigid.

"Don't you lie to me Alexis Marie Thomas. I called your school; there were no projects or assignments on sacrifices. This is an awful website! No matter what you were doing, it's done. Not to mention I found out you weren't at school yesterday, you're lucky I found out you were just with Vee. I'm taking all of your technology, and you are grounded. You are not to leave this house again unless it's for school. Do you understand?"

"Yes ma'am." I looked down, upset. I wasn't prepared for this at all. I relinquished my cell phone, my computer, my iPod, and anything else that connected me to the real world. When Blythe finally left, I sat on the floor hitting my head against the wall.

_How am I supposed to get anything done now?_ I asked myself. _What are they doing back home anyways? I bet they're all having a wonderful time now that I'm not there to ruin them anymore._

I blinked back tears and curled up on the floor. I closed my eyes to rest and willed myself to go back home. Unfortunately, nothing happened.


	15. Chapter 13

Everyday had started to blend in with the rest. I would get up, get ready, my mother would give me the evil eye, I would go to school, head to the library, and then go home. I hadn't gotten any of my technology back yet and I was dying without my cellphone. Vee and Elliot had lunch with me most of the time, and despite his advances, I kept his and my relationship platonic.

The straw that broke the camel's back was Friday. It was two weeks after that eventful (or confusing) party, and I wanted to go out and have some fun. My research wasn't coming along at all, and getting my mind off of things sounded really good.

I got home that night and found Blythe reading a book on the couch. I sat down next to her and cleared my throat.

"Mom, I wanted you to know I'm really sorry I deceived you last time, but I think I deserve to have my cell phone back, and I would really appreciate it if you would let me go to Vee's."

She turned to me and put the book down. "Well, Lexi, I am glad you came to me and asked, but I'm sorry. The grounding will be lifted when I say so. Do not ask again."

_That's it_, I thought_, I don't owe her anything. I'm not five years old; she can't treat me like this_.

"I asked nicely, but I really think it's getting kind of ridiculous. Please, just at least let me have my phone…" I tried to continue but she cut me off.

My 'mother' stood up and stared daggers down at me.

"You cut school for a whole day without an explanation Alexis. I am not letting you out until I think you've learned your lesson. End. Of. Discussion." She turned to walk out of the room when my inner thoughts bubbled over.

"I'm sick of you treating me like some little brat! I'm taking my phone Blythe and I'm going out. Do what you can to try and stop me, but it won't work. Oh, and I'm taking my car too. I'll be back, I'll text you when I can." I sat up myself, went to the drawer I knew she kept my phone in, shoved it in my pocket, grabbed my keys, and left. I made sure to slam the door very loudly too, Blythe sat in utter silence looking like she could cry. I swallowed my guilt as I dialed Vee's number. I didn't really want to hang around her right now, but I did want to know of a good place to go when someone wants to take their mind off of their crappy existence.

"You got your phone back?!" Vee squealed into the phone.

"Yeah, not really, listen, I want to go out tonight but I don't want to end up in any bad locations, you know? Where would you advise I avoid so I don't get into more trouble?" Yes, that seemed deceptive enough to deal with her.

"Be careful Lex. Just avoid Delphic, unless you're going with someone it's going to be crazy, and Bo's. Definitely stay away from that place."

"Thanks Vee. I'll see you soon." We smacked kisses loudly near the speaker and said our goodbyes.

I was quite pleased with my discoveries too. Bo's sounded like a fine establishment for someone who wanted to flirt with danger. I typed to location into my phone's GPS and was directed there in just over thirty minutes.

When I pulled up into the parking lot I knew it wasn't my usual kind of place. But for the new Lexi, it definitely would be. There were two signs as I made my way into the queue, one pointing to the arcade and one pointing to the pool hall. I had a familiar sense of deja-vu overwhelming me, but I ignored it and chose the latter.

I was never more thankful of my pool lessons from one of my earlier foster families than I was now. It was good to know how to play in a place like this where men would easily want to take advantage.

I paid my dues and strutted my way to the green felt table. During the car ride, I added a bit more makeup, took my top layer off (as I was still dressed in my school clothes) and cuffed my jeans so they were just below my knee. It wasn't super sexy, but it was enough that I looked older and wiser.

At one table I noticed a good looking man, maybe four years older than me, playing with some other guys. They weren't anything special, which was why they were my target.

"Looking for another opponent?" I asked tossing the man a grin.

His eyes checked me out and he smiled in return.

"I sure am, love. You up for the challenge?" he had a distinct accent and I liked it.

"I think that question should be reversed. But if you play me, you might want a drink to make your loss go down easier."

"I would love to get _you _a drink Miss…." He trailed off searching for my name.

"My name's Bianca." I had no idea why I lied about my name, but it sounded powerful and I wasn't sure I wanted my name to be associated with a place like this.

"Okay Bianca, and what would you like to drink? A pretty bird told me it would make losing easier." He winked at me.

"Vodka Soda, please." I told him while I grabbed a cue stick, ignoring his jab.

He came back and handed me the drink and I tossed it back, the alcohol felt good and calmed my nerves.

He let me break, and we played for a little while. He was actually really good, something I wasn't used to since I was such an amazing player myself.

During one of his final shots, the man looked up and his eyes fixed on something. I didn't want to appear nosy so I kept my gaze fixed on the game.

"You aren't letting this lady here beat you, are you Rixon?" The voice asked.

I looked up then, wondering who had commented on our game. My eyes met a dark charcoal set staring back at me. The eyes belonged to someone who was exceptionally attractive.

I blushed, noticing I was checking out a perfect stranger and turned back to Rixon.

"Actually, I think I need a break. Bianca, would you mind playing with my friend here." He walked towards the bathrooms without waiting to hear my reply.

The man smiled at me and my stomach did a few somersaults.

"Bianca is it?" He smirked, almost as if he knew it wasn't my real name. I blushed again.

"Uh, yeah." I nodded. "Do you have a name?"

"The name's Patch." He searched my face as if he was anticipating a special reaction, but I had none.

"Oh, interesting name." It dawned on me then.

_The book, I finally found him!_

"Do you happen to go to the high school near here?" I asked. He didn't respond, just picked up where Rixon left off.

_Guess he won't be too helpful then… _

As Patch grabbed the stick and sunk the blue solid ball into the right pocket he was aiming for, my brain buzzed. It was liked someone had turned my mind to vibrate. He took another turn, but scratched. As I pulled my stick up to play, the vibrating became more intense. A memory came to the tip of mind, like I was in the same situation as before, but it was too intense. My body couldn't take it. I slumped down, and the world turned black. I knew I had passed out, I felt paralyzed, but my brain was still wide awake. An extremely intense buzzing was continuing in my head and the more I tried to break through it, the louder and more agonizing it became.

* * *

Light finally returned and I opened my eyelids. My surroundings were the same, but I didn't feel the hard surface of the pool hall's ground underneath me. I glanced at my waist and saw two big hands were around me. Looking to my right, I saw the man I was playing with. Patch.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what happened. I feel like this keeps happening to me." I turned red, furious at myself for collapsing into a stranger's arms. I fought my way out of his grasp and stood, still a little wobbly.

"It's alright Bianca." He frowned, appearing to be worried.

"I'm sure this game is ruined now. I'm going to go."

"Are you okay?" He called to me, but I had been in the process of walking out.

I marched to my car, angry with everything that had happened.

_There is no way of getting home, I should just deal with all of this. Heck, who knows! Maybe it will be a good thing! It's not like I have anything left back at my real home anyways. _

**_I give up._**

I was done. I would accept all of it, and it would be fine. I checked my pockets to see how much money I had left; maybe I could go somewhere else. I found that I still had three twenties after I paid my cover to get into the arcade. I was very glad that Nora kept a little bit of savings in her room previous to my arrival.

I reached my car and I saw a figure move out in the distance. It was a black shadow like I had seen at lunch a few weeks ago. I grabbed my keys, trying to get out of there as fast as I could though a wave of nausea had hit me. That's when I noticed my car, a window had been smashed and my glove compartment had papers lying all over the place. I screamed.

Who had been riffling through my stuff, and who would try to break into my car?

I felt a body next to me and went to scream again.

"Sh. Bianca, it's just me." It was Patch, he probably heard my yell and came out.

I pointed at my car and the glass fragments on the gravel. "My car, someone broke in." I told him as tears threatened to escape me.

"What are you talking about, it looks fine to me." He questioned me.

"What?" But when I looked at the car again, everything was as it should have been. My window was fine, there was no glass, and the interior of my car looked neat.

I groaned. "Someone must have drugged the drink I had." It was the only conclusion that made sense to me.

"Do you need me to drive you home?" He asked seeming sincerely concerned.

"No. I'm sorry, it's just been a really long few weeks for me, and I don't know you."

"Please, I insist." Patch went to grab my wrist when I tried to shove past him. The toe of my shoe caught on an uneven part of the ground and I fell. Patch's hand was still on my wrist so he joined me at my side. Oddly, some part of me felt taken aback that he hadn't caught me, but I shook my head and moved on. I looked at him as he took his hand back and noticed something strange. It poked out from under his t-shirt and was located on his lower back.

Before I knew what I was doing, I reached out and touched it.

I heard a loud swear word that shouldn't really be said in a ladies company, and then I started to move. I wasn't sure if the world moved, or if I moved, but I was definitely in a different place.

_I'm home! I'm back!_

I was so wrong.

* * *

When the motion stopped, I was able to take in my surroundings. I was in a room, it looked so familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I heard noises and looked straight ahead, there were two bodies on the bed, and they were moving rather intimately.

I coughed loudly, but they didn't turn to look at me. They stopped moving and kissed passionately. It was obvious they were two people very much in love. I moved closer once I saw them putting back on their undergarments, but they didn't acknowledge my presence. I shouted and waved, but still no response. I figured I was either glimpsing into the future or maybe a different dimension, when I noticed their faces.

One was devastatingly handsome.

_Patch. _

The other made me gasp loudly.

The girl was average looking, with light brown hair that was wavy and sticking up in places, no doubt due to her latest activities, and her body was curvy, but thin.

That girl was…me?!

This was no alternate reality because Patch was in this reality, but I hadn't even met him before. What was going on? Maybe it was just someone who looked like me.

"Alexis." The girl said, and my breathing stopped suddenly.

"What baby?" Patch asked her, his eyes full of adoration.

"My full name is Alexis Marie Thomas." She replied.

"Why-" he started, not being able to finish before the girl could answer.

"That's my real name. Now you know everything. Now you've had all of me."

Tears leaked out of my eyes, and my cheeks were being coated with the wetness. I didn't remember this, what did it mean? Who was Patch? I was a virgin, wasn't I? I had never been in love, right?

The movement started again, and I found myself back at the parking lot. I was alone. It seemed Patch had disappeared into darkness without another thought about me.

_Then it couldn't be real, he didn't even know my name. _

I got into the car, still feeling sick, and headed on the road. I really didn't want to go home, but I didn't want to be alone. I did the only think I could think of and went to Vee's house. She was surprised to see me, but let me in like she knew we had plans all along.

"What happened, Lex?" She asked me as she brushed a remnant of a tear off my face.

"I really don't want to talk about it. Can we just put on a movie and sleep?"

"Alright Lexi Marie, but one of these days you are going to tell me all of the secrets you've been keeping from me. What kind of a movie would you like?" She stated like the loyal friend she was.

"Something happy and funny, I've had enough gloom and mystery to last me a lifetime."

Vee gave me a funny look, but put on some old comedy. I tucked myself into her bed, not bothering to put on pajamas, and curled up into a ball. She laid down next to me and rubbed circles into my back like a mother or a sister would do.

If anything useful came out of this reality, it was the meaning of friendship and how important it could be. Vee was part of my family now and I loved her already.

I let her soothing technique carry me off to sleep.


	16. Chapter 14

_**A/N: Sorry to take so long uploading this chapter. I've had to re-edit it a few times to get it to where I like it. I'm not ever going to give up on this story, but some parts are harder to write than others and take a little longer. There should be another chapter up today or tomorrow. Thank you to all of my loyal followers! And read on!**_

_**[Also, I don't own Hush, Hush, but I really wish I owned Patch. Better yet, he could own me.]**_

"It's time." Vee said in a morbid voice, she then winked and smiled.

"You may think it's funny, but you don't have to deal with her." We were talking about my mother. I had to go home today, and I was really wishing I didn't have to.

"You'll be fine. Just tune her out."

"Easier said than done." I rolled my eyes at Vee as I got into my car.

"Good luck babe!" She called as I took off back to my house.

Dealing with Blythe shouldn't have made me so nervous, after all, she wasn't really my mom, but it did. I also felt awful for yelling and fighting with her, she didn't know who I really was; she still thought I was her loyal daughter.

"Here goes nothing." I mumbled as I pulled into the driveway.

* * *

"Lexi Marie, thank god. I had no idea where you were. I've been worried sick!" Blythe cried from the doorway. I wasn't even out of my car yet when the front door had swung open.

"I know, Mom. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get mad at you, I know what I did was irresponsible. I'm so sorry." I told her as she pulled me in for a hug.

"Mom…too…tight." I gasped as she squeezed all of the air out of my lungs.

"Sorry honey." She took a step back and headed in the house, I trailed behind her.

"Lexi, listen. I understand I overreacted and I apologize. You have no idea what it's like to get home and see your daughter has been looking up eerie websites. Not only that, but she's also been skipping school! Your behavior has never been like this, and I don't want you to change from the scholarly, good person you were before."

"I'm not changing." _I already changed._ "And I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do those things. The website was just something my friends and I were talking about at school." _Yeah, right_. "And I skipped with Vee because my hormones were so out of control that day."

"Alright. Please, don't do anything like that again. I'm sorry for being so harsh."

"Thank you, Mom." I let out a breath; it hadn't been so bad after all.

"Oh, by the way, I have to go out of state for work for the next few days. You'll be okay here. Dorothea will be coming tomorrow and every day until I'm back per usual. I put all of your electronics on your bed, you can have them back now. I have to go in about an hour, so I'll need to finish getting ready."

"Okay…" I replied, somewhat confused. She was going to be leaving for a while?

_I can get back to my research_, I thought happily.

I walked up the stairs with a new resolve. I would spend these days figuring out how to get back home, and how I ended up here.

* * *

I had been online for the past five hours, Blythe had already left. I found nothing on all of the subjects I searched for, not an answer in sight for me. Every topic I looked up took me back to the sacrifice page that had gotten me into trouble.

_It figures._

I read a little more on the page, the Angel section interesting me the most, when all of the words seemed to blend together. It was a headache. My head pounded and I threw back some pain pills and water.

"That's enough for today." I told myself as I closed the laptop.

I grabbed my cellphone off my bed and turned it on. I had three missed calls from Elliot, a few texts, and nothing else.

Elliot's texts all read, **_Call me_**.

I hit the call button figuring I had nothing better to do now anyways.

"Hello?"

"Hey Elliot, it's Lexi."

"Oh, hey! I tried calling you earlier." _Yeah, about fifty times._

"Yeah, sorry, my phone was off. What's up?"

"I was just wondering if you wanted to go see a movie with me."

I weighed my options. On one hand, I didn't like Elliot like that, but on the other, I was free tonight, and bored.

"Yeah, that'd be great. I'll be ready in twenty." We agreed on the time and hung up.

I walked to the closet and put on some casual clothes and my jean jacket.

No reason to dress up for him.

The doorbell rang at exactly the time he said he would be here and I bounced downstairs, excited to be out of the house.

"Wow Lexi, you look great!" Elliot said with a big grin on his face. He was looking good as well, with jeans and a white sweater that outlined his muscular frame.

"You too." I told him with a small smile.

He tried to take my hand as we walked off my front porch, but I pushed it away. He was nice, but that was it.

I didn't want a relationship with him, especially when I was trying to leave this reality.

We drove to the movie theater in silence and I thought Elliot had finally taken the hint that I didn't like him in that way.

I was wrong, as soon as we arrived, he tried to grab for my hand again. I let him have it this time. I didn't possess the energy to fight him off all night.

We walked to the ticket booth and Elliot was glowing with pride because of his newest conquest.

"What would you like to see?" He asked me and I almost forgot I had a choice. I shrugged my shoulders letting him choose whatever he thought was best.

"Two for The Sacrifice." Elliot told the person behind the counter.

I looked at him with my eyebrows raised.

"What? It's supposed to be good. If you get too scared you can always cuddle up to me and I'll protect you." He winked.

I felt freaked out, by the movie title and by his need to get close to me. A weird part of me felt taken, I knew I didn't have a boyfriend, but my body acted like I was with someone else.

I brushed the feeling off and followed Elliot into the dark theater.

* * *

Two hours later I found myself in Elliot's car, near breaking point. The movie was utterly creepy. It was about a girl being kept alive just to be used as a sacrifice. I 'needed' to use the ladies' room multiple times during the showing just to escape and calm my nerves. Elliot, however, thought it was a great choice and was amused when he saw how frightened I had been.

"So do you want to go home now?" He asked me.

I whimpered inaudibly. There was no way I wanted to be home alone after watching that.

"Is there anything else we can do?" I questioned, almost desperately.

"I know of a party!" He exclaimed, happy with himself.

"Cool." I muttered and stayed quiet the entire car ride until we found ourselves in Portland.

"Where are we?"

"Relax Lexi. We're going to my friend's party. It's going to be great!" He got out of the car in a hurry and strode up to the front of what looked to be a mansion.

I put on my brave face and followed suit. He led me to the front door of the house, and when it opened, he seemed ecstatic.

"Hey man!" He called out to someone I couldn't see.

"Hey Elliot!" He turned and I got a good look at him.

"How are you doing?" Elliot asked the very tall stranger.

"I'm good. Who's this?" He gestured towards me and his eyes grew wide.

"This is my good friend, Lexi Thomas." Elliot stated.

I rolled my eyes thinking that we weren't good friends at all when his friend sniffed the air.

_Odd_, I thought.

He sneered at me and I felt the urge to run away. How Elliot knew this man, I didn't know. Elliot seemed so friendly and nice, but this man was downright intimidating.

"Hi, it's nice to meet you." I said regaining my confidence.

"It's nice to meet you, too." The man said back to me in a tone that made me think he meant the opposite.

Noticing we were still in the doorway, Elliot and his friend moved inside towards the dining room. There was a great chandelier hanging from the ceiling and below it was a sixteen-seat table. It looked fit for a king, not a teenage boy. Elliot pulled out a chair for me and his friend sat across from us.

I sent Elliot away to get us drinks, and I purposefully asked for water. I didn't need to drink after what had occurred the last two times.

The tension was palpable as the man and I stared at each other. He was scowling at me, and I was trying to smile to show him I was nice.

"I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name." I said trying to be friendly.

"You're right," He grinned and shivers ran down my spine, "My name is Jules."


	17. Chapter 15

_**A/N: Hey everyone, I'm so sorry this took longer. I really don't want this story to feel forced so I have to wait for inspiration to hit. Thanks for putting up with me, and thank you to all who read this story! More soon...Enjoy...**_

Elliot came back with two bottles of water and I couldn't have been happier to have him near me. Jules was starting to freak me out with his fixated stare.

"You haven't been scaring her too much have you Jules?" Elliot joked punching Jules on his shoulder.

Jules glared at Elliot, daring him to touch him again, and I felt goose-bumps creep up my arms.

"You're so tall." I wondered aloud, trying to break the tension yet again. He had to be about six foot seven or something ridiculous like that, and I was curious, so I was hoping my attempt didn't look as desperate as I felt.

"I get that a lot."

"I bet." I tried to make our conversation last. Okay, maybe it wasn't a conversation, but he was being weird and cryptic.

"Have you ever met anyone taller than me?" He said in a bragging sort of way.

"I met two people that were around your height." I replied honestly.

"Who?" He demanded.

"Uh, just these two guys from this place I went to last night. One was named…Rick…no…Rixon. And the other was this guy named Patch." I couldn't help the blush that swept up from my neck to my face as I said his name.

Saying Patch just brought back memories of my dream from the parking lot. Maybe it was drug induced, alcohol induced, or maybe I was crazy, but that didn't make me feel less embarrassed for picturing him in an indecent amount of clothing.

"Patch? Doesn't he go to our school?" Elliot asked me.

"I haven't seen him there."

"Huh." He tapped his finger to his chin before shrugging. "Oh well."

Elliot and Jules continued to have a conversation about meaningless things, Elliot agreeing with everything Jules said, and Jules speaking harshly if he hinted at disagreeing. It was beginning to spook me and I really wanted to leave.

"Elliot, I think I should get home now." I finally spoke up.

At home I might be alone, but it was better than the bitter, cold feeling that was emanating off of Jules.

"Very well. It was good seeing you Jules." Elliot bumped fists with his friend before pulling him in for a half-hug, I watched curiously as Jules seemed to resist his friend's touches and affection.

* * *

Leaving the house was awkward for me, in a way. I had really liked Elliot at school, and even being alone with him while watching the movie wasn't that bad. But I didn't like Jules at all, and I didn't like how Elliot acted around him even more. It was like Jules was a puppet master and Elliot was his finest dummy, always moving and speaking the way Jules wanted him to. Sitting in the car with Elliot was nerve-wrecking. I tried to look everywhere but at him, and I think he started to catch on. He smiled at me as soon as noticed me glancing his way, and I gave him a pathetic attempt at a half smile. I must have been a good actress because his smile grew wider and he grabbed my hand before I could argue. Not wanting to anger him, I let him have it, and continued to stay silent until we made it to my house and walked up to the porch.

"I had a great time tonight Lexi." He told me, his body leaning into mine.

"Me too. Thanks." I replied hurriedly as I grasped the doorknob. His lips came to meet mine before I had a chance to turn away. The feeling was awful. He was slobbery, like a big dog, and his lips were going the exact opposite direction as mine. We were completely out of sync, and for that reason I didn't feel bad for pulling away from him.

He looked stunned, guessing I wanted him as much as he seemed to want me, but said nothing.

I gave him an apologetic smile before letting myself in the house, shutting (and locking) the door behind me. I stood against the frame for a while, breathing a sigh of relief that the 'date' was finally over, before I slid down to the ground.

The past few weeks I had felt empty, hollow, and it wasn't just because I was in the wrong place. It was something more and I didn't know what. Spending the day with Elliot had only heightened the feeling and made it worse. My heart wanted something, maybe even someone else, but nothing in my mind could defend that.

I pulled my arms around myself, hugging my body tightly hoping to keep myself in one piece.

"I'm going to go home soon; I'm going to go home soon..." I murmured to myself several times before falling asleep.


	18. Chapter 16

It had been over a month since my semi-date with Elliot, and things had begun to have a pretty good rhythm. Blythe and I had shared some good days together when she was home, and as bad as I felt about not being her flesh-and-blood, it still felt good to have a mother figure in my life. Vee and I were as close as ever, sharing secrets and gossip like we had always been best friends. I would sometimes entertain the idea of telling her about where I actually came from, but I really didn't want to lose such a valuable friendship. Elliot was persistent as ever, but after explaining to him exactly how I felt, I didn't feel as bad by not turning him down all of the time. I hadn't seen or heard from his friend in a long time too, so I wasn't threatened by the prospect of being alone with him if need be.

School was going fine, I was easing through my classes and other than several attempts to humiliate me thanks to Marcie Millar my social life wasn't half bad either.

I slowly gave up my efforts at researching because I would spend hours, alone, at my desk every night, without getting anywhere. My mind would still wander from time to time, thinking about where Nora could possibly be and what my last family was doing, but something (usually Vee) would pull me back out of my daze.

The place I had the hardest time being Coldwater-Lexi was in Ms. Greene's office. She was the school's counselor, and from what I inferred, it was Nora's fault I had to see her weekly. It was hard trying to keep up with what the files had said about me, but it turned out I was there because of 'my father's' murder that had taken place a year ago. It hurt me deeply having to fake-grieve over a man I didn't know, a man who had a family that were actually grieving over him, but I did so to placate the school.

The first meeting with her had been so interesting:

_It was the Monday after my long weekend, I got a notice to see her after school, and when I finally found her office I saw her standing in the doorway waiting for me, her eyes burning a hole in my wrist where Nora's birthmark lay. I turned my arm inward, shielding the mark from her view, and her eyes snapped up at me. She held out a dainty arm and I took it, shaking her hand and saying a hello. She sneered at me, it was only for an instant and then her expression returned to that of a professional demeanor. She took me inside the office and I sat down in a cushioned chair. _

_"So, Lexi Thomas, it's wonderful to meet you. I've read so much about you." She told me giving me a slight smile that never reached her eyes. _

_"It's nice to meet you too." I blushed, wondering what the file she had in her hands contained. _

_"We both know why you're here so let's cut to the chase." She stated bluntly. _

_My eyes widened and for a moment I wondered what Nora had done to get us placed in the hands of a school therapist. _

_"Your father died a year ago, that must be hard on you, how are you feeling?" She asked me. _

_I inhaled deeply, thankful I wasn't in serious trouble for anything out of my control. _

_"It's definitely…difficult. Especially when others think they know you, I mean your feelings, but they don't." I explained carefully. _

_"Interesting." She murmured while typing furiously onto her computer's keyboard. _

_I smiled, not quite sure how else to respond, I hated the feeling of someone writing down my every move and word, especially a stranger. Her hands relaxed and she glanced over at me, her eyes scouring over my face, and I felt awkward. She appeared to be searching for something and I had the feeling of annoyance spread over me. _

_"Are we done here?" I asked her._

_"One more thing, your biology partner, have you spoken to him yet?"_

_I looked at her, confused, before replying, "Patch? I haven't seen him at all." _

_She uttered a thank you before motioning me to leave. I happily complied and exited the building. _

The meetings after were similar, she always mentioned Patch and I was unsure why, but she seemed joyful that my response was always the same, that I hadn't met him. I did meet him outside of a pool hall once, but I never brought it up. I didn't think that it was any of her business anyways.

* * *

I made my way to the lunchroom that afternoon to the usual spot where Vee, Elliot, and I ate. I put my tray down loudly as they were in the middle of another unimportant argument, and their attention turned to me.

"Hey guys, did you see what Marcie did to me at gym today? She deliberately made the coach pick me as captain because she knows I can't play basketball! I'm so sick of her." I let out a heavy sigh.

Vee looked at me with amusement. "Yes we saw what happened; we were both next to you. I can't believe you've let her get to you so much the past few weeks, she's always been like this."

I rolled my eyes at her truthful statement and told Elliot to back me up.

"Sorry Lex, she's right." He said borrowing the nickname Vee had given me.

I let out a cry feeling exasperated and Elliot tickled my ribs slightly.

"Stop- Elliot- that- tickles." I managed in between giggles.

Okay, yes, I was acting like a dramatic teenager who was desperate for attention in front of her loved ones, but that's what I was. And for once I was happy to be allowed to be normal.

"Listen Lex, I want to take you to the Delphic Amusement Park, it's like a half an hour away, and I think you'd love it." He tried to go on with his argument before I stopped him.

"I'm in." I said, wanting to go exploring a little. I didn't see it as leading him on, I made sure to tell him it was not a date, and after our last 'date' I had sat him down and explained that we were and always were going to be, just friends.

Vee beamed at me and I smiled back at her, catching my reflection in a nearby window. My light brown hair had more of a bounce in it, and my green eyes were bright with excitement. The girl who I saw resembled me in many ways, but overall she just looked healthier and happier.

"Cool, so I'll pick you up Saturday at eight?" Elliot asked bringing me back to the present.

"Sounds great." I told him honestly.

I hadn't been to a theme park in a long time, and while I didn't enjoy roller coasters, I knew I would enjoy the atmosphere. I couldn't wait, and I showed it by bouncing in my seat a little. I had to wait a few days and then I would be on an adventure with a good friend.

I looked back at my reflection and she flashed me a knowing grin and we shared the same thought. _Things are already looking way up._

* * *

**_A/N: Alright, so wait for it folks. Our favorite tall, dark, and sexy character will be back soon. What will happen? Stay tuned... :]_**


	19. Chapter 17

Saturday finally rolled around and I spent several hours getting ready. It wasn't to impress Elliot, but I was enjoying dressing up. Blythe had left earlier in the afternoon claiming a work emergency, leaving me to my closet. I rummaged through it before settling on a spring dress, navy blue with a green flower pattern, and my usual jean jacket. I straightened my wavy hair and put on some hoop earrings before painting my face with makeup.

I looked in the mirror at the Lexi who stared back at me.

_Good enough_, I concluded.

The doorbell rang at eight on the dot and I skipped down the stairs, meeting Elliot outside.

We carried on casual conversation in the car, but when we reached our destination I was silent. The park was busy, really busy, but what I noticed was the ride towering above the park's entrance, meeting the heavens halfway. It looked old, dangerous, and rickety, and there was no way in hell Elliot was going to get me on it; which, of course, was the first thing he tried to do once we made our way inside.

"Come on Lexi, you'll love it I swear." He promised as he dragged me towards my doom.

I planted my feet firmly on the pavement and stared daggers at him.

"Elliot Saunders, there is no way I am getting on that thing, not if hell freezes over, not even if I'm dead." I persisted.

"Geez, fine." He frowned.

"Elliot, it's not you, I just don't want to go on it. What is it anyway?" I asked suddenly curious, as though seeing it spiked something in memory.

"It's called the Archangel, it's pretty awesome." He told me excitedly.

"I'll take your word for it." I said under my breath but I knew he heard me.

"Elliot, why don't you go on it and I'll just get us some drinks. It doesn't look like the line is too long anyway." I reasoned with him.

"Yeah, okay, fine." He told me after taking a long pause to mull it over. He walked over to the death trap (I mean roller coaster) oozing confidence.

I turned on my heels, happy he was happy, and went to look for a concession stand. Finally finding one, I got to the front of the line to place my order.

That's when I saw him.

_Patch._

I took a sharp intake of breath.

_Relax Alexis,_ I told myself, _you only saw the back of his head. You don't even know if it is him. And, if it is, why do you care?_

I shook my head gently, erasing all thoughts and logical explanations from it, and took off after the figure. He had almost been swallowed up by the crowd, but I caught up to him.

I stayed back ten paces at all times, pausing when he paused, and using the people around me as human shields. I knew if he had seen me he would have run, like he had at the pool hall, and I wanted answers for the way he acted that night and for the vision I had about us.

I came to a stop when his body was no longer in my line of vision, then I noticed the door. It said employees only and led to tunnels underneath the park.

I opened the door quietly and saw a shadow at the end, it was him. I picked up my pace and finally made it to the end. I heard voices so I stilled, not even breathing.

It was definitely a man and a woman; that much I could hear, but I couldn't make out any actual words.

I sucked in my breath, and stepped forward out of the shadows when I came to what looked like, a house of sorts.

The voices were a little louder now and I could hear they were on the other side of the door, where Patch had to be.

_I have to know what happened. _

I turned the knob and pushed the door open, surprised by what I had seen, I gasped.

* * *

Patch stared at the entrance with his mouth hanging open and a look of surprise on his face, sitting next to him, their bodies touching in an intimate manner, was her….

"Ms. Greene?" I gaped.

_My guidance counselor was dating my biology partner?_

Ms. Greene looked shocked and disgusted by my appearance and I decided it would be best if I just left.

My mind was still reeling from what I had just walked in on and I mentally scolded myself for going into someone else's home without knocking or being invited. I almost reached the exit to find Elliot, who was probably worried sick about me, when I felt a hand grab my wrist and spin me around.

His eyes looked over my face and I became red with anger.

"Can people stop searching my face as if they expect me to know something?!" I yelled at him.

I took a deep calming breath before coming to my senses. I was alone, in a dark tunnel, with a complete stranger. Why did I feel safe?

"Can you please let me go?" I begged Patch, praying he would release me.

He didn't reply and his eyes stayed black as night.

"Well then can you tell me exactly what happened like a month ago at the pool hall?!"

He smirked and I felt my blood boiling again. "I don't know, what happened?"

"You are insane!" I told him trying to pry his hand from my wrist.

"Lexi, calm down." He told me reassuringly.

I froze.

"My- my name. How do you know my name? I told you it was Bianca." I questioned him.

Patch looked nervous then, as though he was torn in two. I didn't care.

"What happened the night at the pool hall? You knew who I was, didn't you? Do you know what I saw, was it true?"

"I don't know what you saw, Lexi. Yes, I know you, I need to explain but it won't be easy."

"How do you know me? I met you once! Do you know how I got here or something, can you help me figure that out? Were we close once in a different world or something?" The questions continued to pour out of my mouth.

"Lexi what exactly did you see?" He asked, his charcoal eyes afraid to meet mine.

I wasn't going to tell him, I decided if I ever saw him again the dream was mine and mine alone, but this was so real. I wanted to know if had taken place somehow, if it was true.

"I saw you, and a woman…"

"Go on."

"It was us. We were…. and then I told you…. but it never happened right? I was drunk or drugged that night, right?" I couldn't form the words on my tongue.

"We were what?"

"We were having sex. We were making love." They words flew out of my mouth and I heard a loud gasp come from behind Patch before I could see his reaction. We turned to look at where the noise had come from, and behind Patch stood Ms. Greene. Her hands covered her mouth and she looked to be in a state of shock.

_She must be with him_, I thought.

Ms. Greene started to back away.

"Patch, go to your girlfriend I'm sorry I even brought this up." I said with tears in my eyes. Every time I said his name it felt like a knife ripping open an old wound on my heart.

"Dabria, leave." He clicked his fingers at her and she shared a look with him before she ran.

Patch turned to me again and something new graced his face. Was it an expression of….adoration?

"Lexi, we need to talk." He told me and tried to pull me back in the direction of the home.

"I can't, I'm on a date." I said, his eyes darkening at the mention of a date.

"Call him then." I nodded not wanting to argue with this beautiful and strange man before me.

* * *

Elliot picked up on the second ring, and he sounded positively nervous.

"Lexi, where are you?"

"Calm down Elliot, I had Vee pick me up, I wasn't feeling well. I'm really sorry to ruin the night."

"Oh thank goodness. I was worried you were kidnapped or something." He breathed a sigh of relief.

"I'm fine, well my stomach hurts, but I'm home. Goodnight Elliot." I lied smoothly.

"Goodnight Lex, feel better."

I hung up the phone and motioned for Patch to lead the way. He gave me a once over and I rolled my eyes, walking in front of him and leading him to his own house.

Patch chuckled, "You haven't changed a bit."

I swung around to face him, my green eyes lit with anger. "You don't know me."

He nodded, grim, and continued walking. I fell in step behind him.

When we reached his place he opened the door and told me to sit on the couch. I obeyed.

I sat down on the soft cushion and my head started to pound. I could see a flash of some sort, I felt a sense of deja-vu, and then I felt my body turn to jell-o. My head hit the other side of the couch and I was near passing out. I gripped my head in my hands and shrieked, the migraine turning into a whirlwind of pain, my nose started to drip blood onto the couch.

Patch rushed to my side with a cloth and plugged my noise for me, my head started to feel better, but not by much.

"What's happening to me?" I asked quietly.

"It's a side effect." He spoke so low that if he wasn't sitting next to me I would never have heard him correctly.

"A side effect of what?"

Patch kept his eyes trained on my nose and he didn't respond.

"Patch, you owe me an explanation. What the hell is going on?!" I yelled, my brain taking more of a beating again.

He turned my head towards him with his index finger and he whispered an apology. I was about to ask him why he was apologizing, when the flood gates opened.

My eyes never left his as old memories poured through, mixing with the ones I had acquired in the past month.

Every touch, every kiss, every argument, every moment with Patch had been erased. By him.

Words danced around in my head.

_Angel, Nephilim, vassal, sacrifice, __**love**__. _

Images followed.

_Patch and I in a heated embrace. Patch hovering above me, pinning me to the bed. Patch drying my tears, holding me in his arms. _

I was hollow for over thirty days because of him. He was a supernatural being, a fallen angel, he needed my sacrifice. He tried to kill me. He helped me. I loved him. How could I have loved someone I barely knew?

Even when I didn't know him, he was on my mind somehow in some way. The void in my heart was gone now, but I was going through too many emotions to care. I felt betrayed, angry, happy, sad, love, shock, surprise, and joy. I was happy to have him back, but I was so beyond livid he would take away my memories, take away my choice.

I was torn into two. On one hand, I could slap him in the face, curse him, and storm out hoping to never see him again. On the other, I could kiss him, let him hold me, and make him promise not to leave me.

I chose a compromise.

I blinked twice gaining control of my movements again and stared at Patch. He waited patiently for my reaction, his eyes searching my face for a clue.

I threw myself into his arms and he seemed more than pleased. He tightened his hold around me and I felt at home and safe for the first time in weeks. I drew back from his grip and he let me go.

Then, I finished my plan, and slapped him across his face, a loud smack noise echoing through the otherwise quiet home.

He rubbed his cheek with his palm and looked at me. "I guess I deserved that, but you know I can't feel it right?" He looked at me smugly.

_Same old Patch._

"Yes you can, you can feel it here." I poked him in the chest where his heart should have been, were he human.

He looked at me, his eyes full of remorse. "I'm so sorry Lexi, I didn't want to." He stopped.

It dawned on me that he wasn't apologizing for what he did, he was sorry for what he was doing.

"You didn't want me to remember did you?" I spat the question at him.

How could he not feel bad for erasing my memory and taking himself away from me?

"No, but you have to now. I've gotten word that there are people out there trying to hurt me, and because I'm immortal, they will do so by hurting people close to me, people that are vulnerable. I need you to leave here, don't come look for me, and don't talk to me. Ignore my presence, act as if we mean nothing to each other."

I could feel my heart break into two. Before he erased our connection, I was in the middle of accepting my feelings. I loved him, even though I knew him for a short while, we were right for each other.

"So I get my memories back just so you can break up with me?" I tried to blink back tears that were threatening to escape.

"We aren't breaking up, Lexi. We were never together." His blunt reply shattered me.

I slid to the floor and bawled. Tears streamed down my face leaving a mess of mascara smeared all over, I pushed back my hair that was becoming sticky from the moisture, all while focusing on not hyperventilating.

Patch sat on the couch and stared at me. I looked up at him and saw nothing but coldness in his face.

"Please don't leave me, too." I whispered. "I love you."

His expression saddened but he said nothing. Using what felt like my last breath, I made one final effort.

"I need you."

* * *

_**A/N: There you have it. Let's see where this heads. Don't give up on dear ol' Patch just yet folks! :]**_


	20. Chapter 18

"Lexi." He breathed softly. With that, he fell down to my side and pulled me into his arms. I continued to cry even though he was trying to comfort me. I wouldn't feel safe until he told me he was going to stay, and it didn't seem like he would.

"Please Patch." I sobbed.

"Alexis, I love you." He replied suddenly.

I stared at Patch in shock, he had just been about to leave me, hadn't he? But now he was declaring his love for me?

"What do you mean?" I sniffed as the last tear dropped from my eye. Anger was slowly building in me, daring to escape at the slightest hint of a wrong response from him.

"I don't want you to be in harm's way Lexi, you mean too much to me. I don't want you getting hurt for me. I don't want you to have to pay for mistakes. If I have you push you away then so be it, it's better than someone hurting you…or worse."

"You can't make that choice for me Patch!" I told him, my anger bubbling over. "I would rather love you for a day than be shattered for eternity because you decided on your own what was best for me. I know what's best for me, not anyone else!"

"I'm sorry. It's too dangerous for you to get involved with me publicly."

"I don't care how dangerous it is. I've had a whole month without you in my life, the entire time I felt like something was missing. Yes, it was fine and I made the most of it, but I just got you back. I'm not letting you go. I can't."

"Lexi-" He started.

"Don't say anything. Just hear me out. I am your equal Patch and I refuse to be treated like a weak fool. And being your equal means we are in this together, half and half all the way. We might not be able to be together publicly like I want, but there is nothing wrong with being together privately. I am also rather surprised by your sudden need to protect me as you left me completely stranded for a month!" I finished my statement strongly and waited for his reply.

Patch continued to hold me in a tight embrace but I wiggled until his grip loosened so I could look up at his face.

"I didn't leave you for a month thinking you were going to be in more danger. I got word tonight of someone finding out about us, that's why Dabria was here. I was going to find you and explain so you could be kept safe, but you found me." Patch explained while playing with a piece of my hair.

"Dabria is Ms. Greene, right? Did I miss something there? She seemed rather cozy with you. How do you even know my therapist anyway?" I asked him.

"Ms. Greene? I'm not sure who that is, do you mean Dabria? Your therapist, what therapist?"

"Well, she isn't my therapist, she's Nora's. I have to see her weekly at school to talk about what happened to Nora's dad, oh, and she does bring you up a lot… Come to think of it, she's always asking about it. How do you know her?"

He pinched his nose while looking concerned. His forehead creased and his mouth was turned down in a frown.

"Lexi, she's an ex-girlfriend." He stated very carefully trying to evaluate my expression.

"Oh." _I wasn't expecting that. _"From when?"

"Lexi, she's an angel. She's an angel of Death. She can see things, important things, and she came tonight to tell me about a vision she's had. I'm afraid she still might…" He cringed, "like me."

"Well that sounds great, a jealous ex-girlfriend who knows we slept together and who also happens to be a reaper of sorts. That's just dandy. And to top it off, I've been seeing her for months telling her deep parts of my, or Nora's life, thinking she was trustworthy."

"I had no idea she was doing that, I don't understand why she'd want to be near you." He looked confused but any girl would know exactly what she was doing.

"She's jealous, she must have had a vision about us or something and she wanted to spy on me or keep me away from you."

"I'm sorry Lexi."

I shrugged thinking there wasn't much I could do.

"There's one more thing though." Patch said.

"What's that?"

He tilted my chin upwards and his lips crushed against mine. We moved together, perfectly synchronized. It felt so good to have him again, to feel so close to him. I had missed him so much without knowing it, and because of that the experience was so much better. I felt the heat coming from his body, and the way my stomach did somersaults by him moving his hand to the skin of my back. Everywhere he touched was like an electric shock. I finally felt whole again.

He broke off the kiss letting me catch my breath.

"I love you Lexi." He spoke softly.

"I love you Patch." I grinned against his lips.

"I don't want this moment to end, but you have to get out of here and go home to where you're safe. I promise I'll come for you as soon as I get word of who is doing this so I can protect you correctly. I'll be keeping watch from a distance though."

I sighed knowing he was correct.

"Okay. I'll miss you. Please don't leave me again." I looked at him feeling vulnerable as I showed my desperation.

"I won't." He promised. "I'll miss you too, but I'll always be close by, even if you don't think I am."

Patch let go of me and helped me to my feet, kissing me on my forehead before he led me to the door.

He brushed his lips across my cheek softly and I could feel my heart melting.

"Stay safe, love." Patch whispered in my ear.

* * *

I was amazed I made it home in one piece. There were so many emotions he had unleashed by giving me back my memories that it was hard calming down from them. The drive was uneventful and once I got home I phoned Blythe to let her know I was going to bed. I reached her answering machine and told her I would call her the next day. She had me on such a routine the last month that I was used to waking up at the crack of dawn.

_Not tonight_, I thought cheerfully, _I'm going to sleep in until noon_. In some ways I was very grateful for the break from her presence. Being someone else's daughter was mentally exhausting.

I snuggled up in my blanket letting my thoughts wander to Patch.

I was so overjoyed to be with him and to know he was watching over me. I felt safe, really truly safe, and he wasn't even near me.

I smiled to myself and rubbed a finger across my cheek where he had last placed his lips. I still felt tingles and I giggled to myself.

I stopped abruptly and smacked a hand to my forehead. "I sound like a stupid, giddy schoolgirl." I said to no one in particular.

I regained my composure and thought back to the day I had met him. When he strolled into class and seemed surprised that I was there. Even back then, I think he must've known I was different. He saw me when no one else could, as cliché as that sounded.

Closing my eyes, I let the memories I had yet to be able to treasure flood my mind. I blushed red when I thought about Patch and I's 'big night' and grinned when I thought about our earlier encounters.

I couldn't believe that I, Alexis Marie Thomas, was in love; that I was finally happy and that things were going right for me.

Everything is finally perfect.

I happily drifted off into a sleep without knowing how atrociously wrong I had been.

* * *

_**A/N: Okay, I'm trying to crank this story out as fast as possible while still having it be up to my (very high) standards. Let me know what you think! Thank you to my loyal readers and followers, and even to the few who accidentally stumbeled on here and liked what you read! :D More soon, we're getting to the good parts! **_


	21. Chapter 19

The smell of smoke wafted into my room at around three in the morning. Unfortunately for my unconscious body, I believed I was simply dreaming. My first and closest foster brother, Kevin, would always try to get our foster parents to have cookouts on the weekend, and I eventually came to love the smell of the grill's charcoals heating up. That was what was in my mind when the smell became too distinct and strong for it to be a dream. I awoke slowly and rubbed my eyes.

"Holy Christ!" I screamed as I jumped out of my bed.

I could see smoke pouring into my room and I coughed wildly. I could feel my throat burning as I rolled hurriedly out of the bed to the floor, getting as low as I could beneath the billowing plumes of smoke that seemed to intensify with each passing moment.

My mind was racing, but I did think to grab my cell phone off of the dresser before bursting through the door and flying down the stairs. Blythe's bedroom was a bright red as flames danced across the entryway. I stopped and stared for a few seconds before recovering, my thoughts scrambled. I grabbed my now ashen jacket off of the coat hanger and shrugged it on quickly, covering my nose with my sleeve, trying my best to block out the smoke.

I wasn't sure where the fire extinguisher was located and by the time I got to it, I wasn't positive that it would help at all. I did the next best thing, opting to dial Patch's number on my cell phone. I waited what felt like an eternity as it rang and rang. The voicemail finally picked up.

"Thank god." I muttered.

"Patch! I need help-" I was cut off.

"What?" I spun around and found myself face to face with an angel of death.

"Dabria." I muttered nodding at her, fear crashing over me like a wave.

She took my phone that was now in her hand and crushed it before throwing it into the flames.

"Can I ask who you were calling little Lexi?" Dabria gave me a sinful smile that turned the blazing hot room cold in an instant.

"Patch." I told her trying to stay strong and stand my ground.

"Patch? Oh how cute. You actually think he loves you, don't you? How pathetic, even for you."

"What do you care? And you don't know me; pathetic is a word I'd use to describe some desperate, jealous ex."

Dabria lunged at me with her arms out, but I darted away before her hands could grab hold.

"Lexi, don't you know he's only near you so he can get his wings back and join me? That's where he belongs, not with some lost and confused human." She stalked towards me slowly with an evil glint in her eyes. My heart was pounding in my throat, which only worsened when I realized I was backed into a corner.

"That's not why we're together." I stuttered, trying to maintain my fortitude.

She continued to move closer while she spoke. Knowing I only had one shot, I sprang on my heels with as much strength as my tired body could muster. The move caught Dabria off guard and allowed me to make a run for the kitchen. Knowing I had a step on her and had broken her line of sight, I ran into the pantry and, thankful I could fit in it, slid the doors hastily shut behind me. Then I waited. I prayed she wouldn't find me, and I prayed that Patch would know I was in trouble and rescue me.

I slowed my breathing down and managed to control my heart rate. I didn't hear any movement outside and several silent moments passed. I was leaning close to the slat door to peek outside when the doors were thrown open and Dabria stood before me. Her eyes told me she enjoyed the fact that I had nowhere left to run. Like a caged animal, I was at her mercy.

She grabbed my top and yanked me forward, I could feel her breath on my face and I cringed.

"You are a stupid, worthless brat," she spoke pulling me close and staring into my eyes. "I have no clue what Patch saw in you." She spat at me before throwing me down with a force that shook the ground. I was left breathless and struggled to move.

All of a sudden the pain washed over me as I tried to raise myself up on my arms. Dabria kicked me in the stomach and the agony shot through me in violent spears. I lay on the ground in defeat, entirely afraid of what she had planned for me.

_I can't go out like this_, I thought as I clutched my stomach. _I'm not going to go down without a fight. _

She bent down to me; hands ready to ensnare me once again, when I grabbed her hair and pulled her as best I could to the ground. Blocking out the pain, I leapt to my feet and ran into the living room towards the front door. The smoke was thickening still and the air was hot as a furnace. The fire was spreading more quickly now, I needed to get out of the house.

Dabria was behind me in a flash. Her strength had me at a loss. She grabbed a handful of my hair which stopped me dead in my tracks. I didn't know what to do but scream, scream and hope someone, anyone, would hear me. I worked too hard for the past few months to go out in flames.

Beyond the noises of disintegrating timbers from the floor above and the crackling of the fire, I barely heard a crash as the front door was kicked off its hinges. Dabria was holdings me down now over the couch, her icy hands wrapped around my throat, choking my life away. There was a commotion and suddenly I felt the grip loosen and disappear. I leapt forward on instinct alone and whirled around to see Patch standing across from her. Dabria, now unconcerned with me, dashed away into the flames and disappeared. Patch didn't move to follow her though. His eyes were trained only on me as he rushed to my side. He knelt beside me and tried to hug me but my stomach was too bruised to be touched. Lances of pain shot through me again.

"Patch, your phone. I have to call 911." I gasped; the smoke filling my lungs was stronger than ever.

He dialed it for me as he pulled me carefully into his arms. I breathed in his scent, which was a mistake as it only made me cough more. It didn't take him long to bring me outside the house.

We were finally outside, I could breathe again.

"Lexi, we need to go. I'll bring you to my home, Dabria won't go there to hurt you." I nodded in agreement, lacking the energy to speak. As long as Patch was with me, I knew I was safe.

"Should we wait for the police?" I croaked.

"No, I told them I was a concerned neighbor, if anyone asks, you were out." He placed me down in the Hummer and went to move to the driver's side.

It was only a matter of seconds but my being left alone pushed me over the edge. My breathing became frantic, I tried to gasp as much fresh air as I could but it didn't seem to do anything. My head was pounding and my body ached. I could still feel the hairs being plucked from my head and the boot being kicked deep into my abdomen.

"Lexi, hey, you're safe now. Relax, shhhh…" Patch tried to soothe me which only made it worse.

I started crying again and I hated myself for it. Every time I was with him I turned into a sensitive mess of tears and desperation. Dabria may have been right about one thing, I really was pathetic.

"What's wrong?" Patch asked wiping away my tears with his fingers.

"It's just, every time I feel like life is going my way, something happens. Before I came here, I was finally content and then my family vanished and abandoned me. Then, when I get here, I meet you but I screw it up. And now, we can finally be together, and some insane angel tries to kill me. I just can't do this!" I confessed.

"I know; you don't deserve this. I'll get you back to my place, and we can clean you up so you can rest." He told me as he placed a chaste kiss on my cheek.

I turned my head to face him and kissed him hoping to block out all of the horrible things that had just taken place. It worked but the feeling ended too soon as he broke apart to put the Hummer in gear and pull away back onto the road.

The ride was silent beyond my sniffling as I tried hopelessly to compose myself. I looked at Patch and as angry as he looked, he appeared guilty more than anything else.

We were close to Delphic when I finally spoke up.

"What's wrong?" I croaked, my throat adjusting the clean air I was taking in.

He shook his head before responding. "I just feel like this is entirely my fault. I went about everything wrong."

I could see his internal battle, but I knew he didn't want me to tiptoe around his feelings.

"You're right, you did go about it all wrong, but that doesn't make this your fault. And it also doesn't change things. We could go on and on about "what ifs" but it won't make a difference. What matters is that you saved me, once again, and that you are here for me now." As I spoke I could feel the confidence coming back to me.

Yes, the night was awful and I could've been hurt or killed, but I wasn't. I wasn't even injured horribly, and that was because of Patch.

He let out a deep sigh as he thought about what I said. I could see my words had won him over and he smiled softly in my direction as he put the lumbering vehicle into park and removed the keys from the ignition.

He lifted me from my seat, though that being entirely unnecessary, and carried me bridal style to the front door of his house. Fatigue was creeping back over me and I struggled to keep my eyes open, but I couldn't stop worrying. Blythe would be home soon and what would she think about her bedroom being set on fire? Would there still be a house to come back to? I did my best to put it out of my mind, even if only for a moment. I didn't want to go anywhere, I didn't want to do anything, I just wanted to stay at Patch's with him forever and ignore the rest of the world and its complications.

I closed my eyes and in minutes I felt myself being placed on top of his bed. I squinted through my eyelids, watching him as he worked around me. He pulled the blanket out and covered me with it, tucking it into my sides. He left the room and I wondered where he went when he came back with a washcloth, a paper towel, and a glass of water.

"Can you sit up for a minute?" He asked me softly and I obliged, ignoring the aching pain throbbing in my midsection.

He handed me the water and I drank from it greedily, not realizing before how dry my throat felt. Then, Patch wiped my face with the wet cloth before drying it with the kitchen towel.

I hadn't seen him like this before. He always showed concern and he always made sure I was okay, but he had never gone so far as to clean my wounds.

"Where did she get you baby?" He murmured.

I winced as I pulled up my shirt unveiling an already deep green bruise on my stomach to go along with a half dozen small cuts.

He cursed under his breath and wiped the cloth gently across the injury.

"I'm sure I'll be up to performance standards soon." I tried to joke.

"Are you sure you can wait that long?" Patch smirked and I felt a huge grin spread out across my face.

It was nice to have him back, even if it was a bit forced. He leaned down and kissed me again, this time I was able to wrap my arms around his neck and drag him forward so he was leaning over me. We stayed wrapped up in each other for a while, never doing anything more than kissing, but it made everything we had gone through better.

When I broke off the kiss feeling dizzy from a lack of oxygen, he got off the bed and came around to the other side. I curled up in him like we had done on so many previous occasions and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

_**A/N: Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, I do own a lovely ice cream cake that's sitting in my freezer. Enjoy this chapter and props to my main man for editing and reworking some of it! Read and review, and thanks to my loyal fans! More soon...**_


	22. Chapter 20

The next day passed by quickly. I didn't wake up until the late afternoon, and the aching pain in my throat and stomach told me that the previous night's events were the cause. I found Patch that evening waiting at the dining table with takeout spread across it. We ate in silence, though he kept close to me at all times. It was a good feeling, finally being able to be around him without hiding anything.

The pain in my stomach was still very much apparent, and I had just taken two PM pills to relieve it, when Patch's phone started to ring. Patch looked at it for a moment, as if contemplating whether or not to answer it. His fingers traced over the keys and I could see him almost reluctantly hit the answer button. The voice that came from the phone was loud enough for me to figure it was a woman, and by Patch's annoyed grimace, I figured it had to be Vee.

"It's for you," Patch said, handing the phone to me and clearly ignoring Vee who could still be heard talking on the other end.

"Vee?" I chirped. The voice that responded to me was clearly not Vee, however; and I felt a chill run down my spine.

"Good evening Lexi. I know Patch is there with you so I will get to the point." The voice was cold and raspy, and I was scrambling to figure out where I had heard it before.

"Who is this?"

"I'm sure your fallen angel boyfriend can figure out as much. I expect to see you shortly, and your friend Vee does as well. Meet us at the School Gymnasium. And Lexi, don't keep us waiting. Her life depends on it." The hideous noise of the phone clicking on the other end ushered the name that I had been searching for.

"Jules," I muttered under my breath. Patch could tell something was wrong, he was staring quizzically, but I spoke before he could ask what the matter was. "Jules has Vee, Patch. We need to go, now." I spoke those words as abruptly as possible, my voice faltering and piercing my resilient façade.

"Jules? Who's that?"

"I'm not even sure I know. But he knows about you and what you are. And if we don't hurry…Lets just go."

* * *

The Hummer's tires crunched over the wet gravel as Patch navigated the vehicle into the parking lot. It had barely come to a stop by the time I had flung the door open and began making my way to the Gym. Patch grabbed my arm hard before I got very far.

"You can't go in there, Lexi. Wait here, I'll go in and get Vee. I don't want you in any more danger."

"Unfortunately, this isn't up to you. That's my best friend he has in there, and we have no idea what he's after. He knows about you, so chances are he's dangerous. And he knows we are both coming."

"You don't understand Lexi. What if I hadn't made it on time last night? Where would we be? You barely escaped with your life; I won't let you throw it away. Not now, not ever." Patch's eyes were full of fire, and his grip on my arms loosened. "Please stay, I can't see you hurt again."

"I've been thrown into an entirely different reality, lost all of my family, and my life has been threatened more times than I'd like to remember. Yesterday I was taken by surprise, by an angel of death, and as much as I appreciate you stepping in, I'm sure I would have had it under control."

"Control? That's not what I saw." He paused for a moment, and I could tell his stance was shifting. "I'm not going to convince you, am I?"

"No, you aren't. And as much as I love arguing with you, the more time we stand out here, the less time Vee has. We need to go, now." Patch pulled me close, his grip firm and his eyes focused on mine. It was a look I had never seen before, and it mirrored all my hidden fears, fears I had been forced to tuck away beneath all the chaos of my life.

He kissed me then, and for a brief moment, I was lost. It was the most passionate kiss I had experienced with him, with anyone. It was a kiss that felt like the last, and I was immediately questioning my resolve to go ahead.

He looked me in the eyes again afterward, and I knew we had no choice.

The double doors swung loudly open and the moonlight flooded into the large atrium like rivers of silver. I didn't get a chance to get my bearings before I felt a clamping grasp on my left arm. I was jerked strongly away and I lost my footing. I felt the unmistakable cold of a gun on my temple and a figure, a man, behind me holding me in place. I froze.

_Stay calm, Lexi, _Patch's voice spoke. The words flooded into my mind and despite everything happening around us, I obeyed.

"Chauncey, I should have known," Patch said.

_Chauncey?_ I was sure Elliot had called him Jules before. At this point, my mind was racing.

"Confused, Lexi? I'm sure your angel hasn't told you who he used to possess. Every Cheshvan, your boyfriend," Jules spat the word out menacingly, "used my body. I was in there the whole time, but I couldn't do anything about it. I had to sit by and let him use me like I was his play toy. I've spent decades planning my revenge, but Patch never let anyone get close enough to him that I could hurt; mortals anyway. So imagine my pleasure when I found you with Elliot. I could smell a fallen angel's mark on you. You had slept with one of them, I knew it. I just didn't know which one. I was never more joyous during my existence than I was when I realized you were with Patch. I thought maybe my luck had run out when he never saw you. And yes, I followed you to know for sure, but then last night everything changed. An angel attacked you, and who rescued you? None other than my nemesis himself. All I had to do was trick your little friend here to follow me to the gym."

I turned my head a little to the side and saw Vee on the floor, a vacant expression on her face. It was clear to me that Jules was inside of her mind, warping it so she didn't notice the precedent we were all in. For that, at least, I was thankful.

"Please, just let her go now. We're here, we're what you want," I pleaded. The barrel of the weapon pressed more forcefully into my skull and I let out an involuntary whimper.

"Very well then." Jules exclaimed to my surprise. "Patch, be a gentleman and escort this lady outside. Wipe her memory first and make sure she gets home."

Patch hesitated and I tried to give him a small smile for encouragement.

"Do it soon, or she'll die along with your girl."

Patch reluctantly did as he was told before walking back to where Jules still held me hostage.

"I'm sorry Chauncey. Just please let Lexi go. She has no part in this."

"It was never my aim to harm an innocent, namely Miss Thomas here, but you have forced my hand."

_Lexi, I need you to listen to me carefully. The best way for you to escape is if we use the element of surprise. I'm going to need to possess your body, but I can only do so for a matter of seconds. Once you feel my presence leave, run for the doors, run and don't look back. Focus on getting out. Chauncey will try to enter your mind. Do not let him…. I love you Lexi._

Before I could look at Patch again, a cool rush came over me. I felt my leg sweep out from beneath me and make contact, hard, with Jules' shin. My body willed me to whirl around, faster than I could believe, as my fist connected with his face.

Then pain shot up my arm and I knew Patch was gone. I did what he had told me and sprinted towards the doors as fast as my legs could carry me. I could hear noises behind me, but my focus was on the double doors ahead. I reached them at full speed, and almost reflected off of them when they refused to budge. My eyes swept over the doors and I could see the lock clearly off to the side. These were open, but my body would not advance. It was Jules, just like Patch had warned me.

I scanned the area around me, looking for some means of escape. I could see and hear Patch holding Jules down, and I knew it was taking what was left of his strength to do so. I made sure his effort would not be in vain.

I looked again, and then my eyes found salvation: a ladder across the hall leading to the service floor above. I darted across the room toward it as Jules threw Patch off of him and gave chase. I knew I had to get there in a hurry; I wouldn't be able to out run him on the Gym floor.

My hands grasped each railing as I climbed as quickly as I could manage. I could feel the vibration from the steps as Jules did the same, though a quick look down, which turned out to be a mistake on my part, revealed he was having a much easier time of it, and he was gaining fast.

I could see the top of the ladder when I felt Jules' hand grasp my foot like a vice. My shoe immediately came loose and was gone, and I used what little time I gained to thrust myself up and over the top.

There was only one path, and that was a not-so-small jump across to the rafters. I took a five step run-up and leapt across the expanse. I landed ungracefully on the rafters with a clatter, and as I got my bearings again, I could feel a pressure inside my head. My eyes cast down over the edges of the rafters, and the ground below seemed to shrink. Patch seemed an eternity away on the Gym floor, and I could see him seem to slip away ever farther. I experienced an intense feeling of vertigo and my balance seemed to will me over the edge.

I grabbed the nearby railing to steady myself. I know Jules was close behind me, I had to keep going. By the time I had taken a few steps across the dainty rafters, my fears were realized. Jules' hands had my shirt. I struggled forward, hearing the material shred as I went. I pulled free for a second, but I was trapped. There was nowhere left to run. Nothing left to do.

I looked down at the one man who had changed my life for the better, he had given me the one thing I had always wanted, someone to count on. I knew what I had to do, I had to do the same for him. If I jumped off, he could become human, it would be the sacrifice he had needed all along.

I looked back at Jules who was half a second from capturing me, and without thinking I jumped off of the rafter and flung myself into the unknown.

I heard Patch calling out my name and I could hear the emotion in his voice, but it was already done.

I didn't feel the ground beneath me, I felt no pain, I didn't even see a light. I continued to fall and blackness surrounded me. It was the last time that I was positive I was dead.

* * *

_**A/N: I'm sorry this chapter took me so long...In good/sad news, I only have one more chapter and then an Epilogue left. I hope you enjoy this, please read and review. And thank you to my loyal followers out there, you all are such an inspiration!**_


	23. Chapter 21

I felt myself falling and I knew that it must have been like this when Alice fell down the rabbit hole to get to Wonderland. I couldn't tell if I was falling down or up, time seemed to stop, and the silence was so loud it was almost deafening.

After days, hours, weeks, years, or seconds, a blinding white light interrupted my troubles, and all motion ceased. I was laying on something soft, I could tell. I noticed light shining through my eyelids but I was terrified to open them. I didn't really want to die, but if I was in heaven, I didn't want to offend God by showing my reluctance to enter the pearly white gates.

I took a few shallow breaths when I heard feet coming towards me.

_It's now or never_, I told myself.

I opened my eyes quickly and blinked a few times to gain composure.

"Oh my god!" I heard a slight scream from the corner of the room. I turned to look, but something was stopping me.

I looked down and saw an IV taped to my arm along with other medical devices. A faint beeping sound was on my right, and I realized I was in a hospital.

"I'm alive?" I questioned.

The woman who had made the surprised statement took a step in front of me, she was quite clearly a nurse and she seemed amazed at my recovery.

"I have to go get the doctor, I'll be right back!" She scurried away with a clipboard while repeating "I can't believe it" under her breath.

I took her leave as a time to survey my surroundings. I wondered where Patch was, if Jules was gone, if Vee was okay. I noticed my room covered in flowers, some looked more dead than others but the sentiment was still nice.

"Oh honey, you're awake!"

I looked to where the noise came from and my breathing hindered. I felt woozy and weak at the sight before me. _It's not possible_, I thought.

* * *

"Mom?" I gasped.

It was really her. Not Sally, or Blythe, or any of my other replacement mothers, my birth mother. She stood before me looking the same as she did the night of our accident, but the wrinkles around her eyes told me she had aged.

"I can't believe you're awake! Your father will be here in a few minutes, he just has to clear some things up with the doctors…but you're here!" She sat down at the edge of my bed and her smile was bigger than I could remember.

"Mom, what's going on? We were in an accident…you and Dad…." I was entirely confused.

"I know honey. That was about eight years ago. Your father and I were in the hospital for a little while, but we pulled through. Honey, you've been in a coma."

She wiped away the tears that had started to stream down my face.

"I don't understand. I was here, and I was with Patrick and Sally and they left me…." I rambled on about my previous foster homes and my mom didn't even look concerned.

"The doctors told us if you ever woke up this could happen."

"What?"

"That you could have been dreaming and twisting people in our lives to fit your dreams." Mom explained to me as my father just about skipped into the room.

He ran up to me and planted a big sloppy kiss on my forehead causing me to giggle. I still had tears in my eyes but they were of awe and joy. It didn't seem real, but it was, I felt it in my heart.

_My heart_, I realized. _What happened to Patch, was none of that real?_

My father continued my mother's explanation and I figured he had been outside listening to our conversation. "I missed you so much little girl, we just knew you'd wake up." He ruffled my hair before starting. "Everyone you just named had been in this room visiting you at some point. Patrick and Sally actually visited you every day for a few years, but they just moved about a month and a half or two months ago. I think Sally got pregnant actually. They read and talked to all of the children in the hospital. You responded most to, well besides your mother and I, a little boy named Kevin. He was a year older than you when you came in and he was in treatment for cancer. He would always wander in here when the nurses let him and he would read to you. I think you reminded him of his little sister." Dad smiled at me.

"I can't believe this." I muttered.

"We are so happy to see you awake and talking, we never lost hope. We love you so much… And honey, I'm so sorry about the accident." My mother and father talked over each other professing their parental love and support for me.

"Um, mom?" I began.

They stopped their apologies and looked at me expectantly.

"What about a guy named….Patch."

I eyed them carefully afraid to show any sort of reaction that would portray my true feelings. Of course, it was more than believable he was in the other reality, living his life as a human, but I held out hope.

I quieted my inner-speculations as my mother clapped. She reminded me so much of Vee with her unwavering enthusiasm.

"I told you she'd remember." Mom nudged Dad with her elbow and left the room humming, "I'm going to make a call."

"What the hell just happened?" I asked my dad.

"Now, now; language Lexi." He chided and I grinned. It felt so good to be home.

My mother walked back into the room quickly with a large grin on her face. She looked sly, and her eyes showed that she knew something I didn't.

"Mom, what is going on?" I waited for her response, feeling myself growing impatient.

"I'm not telling." She sang like a schoolgirl. "Now, the doctor needs to come in and poke and prod you and then we can come back."

She exited quickly with my father, I suspected she didn't want to answer any of my questions on the matter at hand.

The doctor came in and ran some tests, asked how I was, shone a light into my eyes, ordered some dinner for me, and then left. I liked him, he wasn't unnecessarily chatty and it helped me recover from whatever actually happened to me easier.

_Was it all really a dream?_ I asked myself as I heard the door open.

I looked up.

For the second time that day, I was surprised to see who waltzed into my room looking unfazed.

"Honey, I'd like you to meet Patch." My mother told me as she walked in with my boyfriend.

"Patch?!" I shouted and I saw my mother shoot my father a knowing grin.

Patch was wearing jeans, a grey undershirt, and Nikes. Was this even the same Patch? There wasn't a spot of black on him.

He winked at me and my heart fluttered.

_Definitely the same Patch. _

"How are you here? Was it all real? I don't understand." I took heavy breaths and the machine next to me began to beep loudly, signaling an increase in my heart rate.

"Calm down." He told me with a smirk.

"We're just going to wait outside for a minute." My mom grabbed my dad by the hand and yanked him outside of the room.

"What is going on?!" I questioned.

"I'm Patch. I've been reading to you for about two months. It's so great you've woken up." He showed no sign as to understanding what I was asking.

"Patch." I whined.

"Yes?" He asked innocently. I groaned at his stubbornness before I started to panic.

What if he really didn't remember me, or what if it was all a dream and I'm in love with a fictional character?

"Anyways, I just wanted to drop off the book we were reading so you could pick up the sequel or whatever." He added, ignoring my daze.

The book landed with a thud on my bedside table and I tore my eyes away from Patch to look at it.

I held back a gasp that threatened to pass my lips and stared at him.

"Pretty good book?"

"If you like that sort of thing, angels seem overrated to me though. And that girl was totally not right for him." He smirked.

"Hush, Hush seems like a strange title." I grinned at him.

"It was a pretty weird story." He agreed.

"I'm starting to understand that maybe books are overrated. I think I'll just stick with real life instead."

I pulled Patch's arm and brought him down to me. His face was a mere inch away from mine when he leaned in. His lips touched gently with mine in a familiar way and I knew that everything that had happened between us was real.

_This is true happiness_. I told myself, savoring the moment that ended too soon.

From the doorway I could hear my mother's voice entwining with my father's groan.

"I told you they'd like each other!" She squealed.

Patch winked at me and chuckled.

"Like's a bit weaker of a word than I'd use." I whispered to him.

"I'd have to agree with you Alexis."

We kissed once more, ignoring my father's displeasure and my mother's giddy taunts. I didn't care what anyone thought. I had found Patch, I had my family. I belonged.

I could get lost in a book, I could pretend to be someone else if I wanted to, but now I didn't. My life is infinitely better than any book I could've picked up. All of the years of heartbreak were worth it for this moment.

I, Alexis Marie Thomas, had finally found my place in this world amongst those I loved and I couldn't be happier.

* * *

_**A/N: An epilogue and then this story will be over. I'm having tears falling down my face, I've never finished a piece of writing before. Is it bad to say I'm a little proud of myself? I know pride is one of the deadly sins, but I don't have too much of it. Hehe. I hope you all enjoy this! Remember, there is still an epilogue, so if anyone's confused, wait and see if your questions are answered. Thanks again to my reviews! Enjoy!**_


	24. Epilogue

**Epilogue: Twelve Years Later:**

I stood on the outskirts of my son's room, watching him interact with his father, the love of my life. Things had changed so much between Patch and I over the years, but our love never diminished, it only matured. Our son, Jev Cipriano, was the spitting image of his father, even at only five year's old. He had deep, dark eyes and a tan that would have women falling over him in later years. I loved him dearly as did Patch. The pregnancy was unexpected, but it was a pleasant shock. My husband turned out to be a better father than I could have hoped for, and Jev was definitely a daddy's boy.

We had decided on the name when we found out the gender. It was a way for Patch to embrace his past, but in way that also helped him move forward to the future.

I watched Patch kneel beside our son's bed and my heart fluttered.

"Daddy, tell me story! Pleasssseee!" The cute little boy begged.

Patch smiled at him and gave in too easily, as always.

I moved further back into the shadows, excited to hear his story. Jev always told me Daddy tells him fantastical stories of Angels and Nephilim and I could only guess they were true and a part of Patch, and I wanted to hear. Patch and I didn't talk much about how we met, we put it behind us, after he scolded me for my sacrifice, of course.

"Alright munchkin, what story do you want?" Patch pointed to a bookshelf and grinned, knowing that Jev didn't want that.

"No, you tell me story. Not a book."

I heard Patch's laugh echo through the night as he asked what story our son would like to be told.

"Daddy, do you know God?"

Patch cleared his throat awkwardly and I was puzzled. We never spoke of God though Jev knew of Him.

"Uh, sure son."

"Tell me story about him! Please!"

I smiled at my son's persistence that he could have inherited from either side of his family.

"Alright kiddo. Hmmm….I got it!" Patch snapped his finger and Jev clapped with glee.

"Once upon a time…." Patch started and I, along with Patch Junior, got lost in the tale.

* * *

Once upon a time, a man lost the one thing he ever really loved, but when it happened, he was able to gain the one thing he had always wanted. The man was so heartbroken that he didn't even want it anymore so he spoke to various angels who passed requests for him to speak to God. He walked around lonely for weeks, and weeks stretched into months. Finally, one angel flew down from the sky and granted him his wish. God would see him, but only for a few minutes. It didn't sound like much, but the man knew how busy and important God was and it meant a lot to him. The angel held out its hand and when the man touched it, he was transported to a heaven of sorts. He was on a mission, so he didn't have time to appreciate his surroundings or glimpse at what some people would never be lucky enough to see. God waited for him on a throne that was much too modest for Him. He deserved to sit on gold, diamonds, and precious jewels, but he was simply sitting on stone.

"What have you asked me here for?" God thundered.

"Sorry, I know it is wrong of me, but I have a favor to ask you." The man stuttered.

"You have been disloyal to me in the past, have broken major commandments, and have finally gotten what you wanted all along, yes?" God asked.

"Yes, yes sir. But I don't want it. I don't want anything without her in my life." The man spoke back.

"And tell me, why should I help you?"

"You don't owe me anything, I know you have bigger things to deal with, much bigger things, and even for you to grace me with your presence…thank you. But I'm not doing this for me, it's for her. She had a whole life ahead of her, and she gave it up, I want you to reverse it, to help her, to send her home with the people that truly care about her. Please, I'm begging you. I will trade places with her if need be." The man said with a strong resolve.

"I will do this, on several conditions." God spoke abruptly, his words shocking the man.

"Anything, please." The man was on his knees now begging.

"One, you must stay by her side forever, if you truly love her, this will be no problem. You must not treat her selfishly or use your humanity in any way other than to better both of you. Two, you will complete the fall again, as painful as it is, to prove your loyalty to her and to me. Three, you must make her happy, if there is ever a time where your love wavers, you will fix it and make it better, you will not give up and you will not leave. If you can do all of this, you have my blessing."

The man broke into sobs, thanking God for his selflessness and his willingness to help.

"Thank you for your gifts." The man told God, not being able to express his emotions.

"Use them well, not everyone deserves a second chance, and fewer get one." God touched the man's shoulder and he went through blackness. He was falling again, feeling the world torn from him as he sped towards Earth. It was pain, the worst pain, but he thought about her and he was okay. It was worth it for him.

He was sent two months into the past into a new reality, and he knew what God had wanted him to do. He waited at the hospital every day and read to the love of his life, willing her to wake up. He stuck by her side; even after the hospital closed he would wait in a nearby motel in case anything about her recovery changed. He sat with her when her parents got tired, when it was nighttime, and anytime the doctors allowed it, he was there. Two months passed and she finally woke up. It was the happiest he had been in a long time, but the look on her face, the joy he obviously brought her mimicked his own. He waited with her every day after she woke up, he told her funny stories, they shared jokes, and he held her hand when she was afraid of the needles. Five weeks went by and she was finally allowed to go home with her parents. The man thought she wouldn't want him with her anymore, but much to his happiness, she did. They loved each other more than they had when they met. He stayed by her side and never left, and eventually they got married and had a beautiful son. The man wouldn't have changed anything for the world.

* * *

I felt tears falling softly from my face as I realized what Patch was telling his son. It was how I came to be in a coma, it was why I was falling for months, and he had done all of this….for me. I silently thanked God, hoping he would receive my message.

"Was that a real story, Daddy?" Jev looked at Patch with curiosity.

"I have to be honest, the story came entirely out my own head." Patch winked at his son, and I loved his ability to be truthful while never giving a straight answer.

I watched Patch stand up and shower Jev with kisses until he begged his dad to stop.

I turned to leave quietly before I got caught for eavesdropping, but I stopped.

Patch exited his son's room slowly and turned to face me, he jumped, shocked that I was there.

I threw myself at him and my arms linked around his neck. His hands worked their way into my hair and we began kissing softly. I brought my legs up and wrapped them around his waist as Patch carried me to our bedroom. The passion was like this only once before, while we shared a lot of desire during normal circumstances sometimes it was just _more_ than others, and that other time was when we learned Patch could really feel.

"I love you." I told him with a fire burning in my eyes.

"I love you, too Mrs. Lexi Cipriano." He told me with a grin. "Now what do you say we get you out of these clothes, such a nuisance if you ask me."

Patch and I could feel our souls as though they were one that night. I loved this man and all he had done for me and I wanted to show him. We were destined to be together and I truly believed that.

* * *

As Patch and Lexi shared affections that night, they didn't notice their youngest son sit up in his room and walk to his open window. They didn't hear him as he told his teddy bear what his daddy had just told him.

They didn't hear him look out at the world and dark night sky before him and utter the words, "Thank you God for bringing my mommy and daddy together. You made them both really happy. I'm glad you did it, because they made me. Good night, God."

And they definitely didn't see a star twinkle twice, brightly, off in the distance as God uttered His own personal "You're welcome" to their beloved son.

* * *

**_A/N: IT'S OVER! WHAAAA! I can't believe it. I'm crying. I hope you all enjoyed it thoroughly and I hope you will continue to enjoy it. It's been fun. I've cried, laughed, screamed, and blushed with all of these lovely characters (that I do not own- besides Lexi). _**

**_Please, let me know what you think, this was my first FanFiction. Goodbye for now! _**


	25. Labor and Delivery: An Outtake

_**A/N: So, some of you have asked for outtakes. Here is one. Patch and Lexi's Pregnancy Story! Enjoy this little tidbit and let me know what you think. Thank you to all of my readers! Xoxo**_

"It's coming." I told him, dead serious.

"What's coming?" He asked.

"The baby, I can tell, it's coming today."

"How do you know?" He was so confused.

"Patch, don't you think I know what's going on with my body. The contractions started a while ago, but they're mild."

"Sorry Lexi. I'm just nervous. Should we leave now?" Patch was full of questions that day.

It was sprinkling outside of our Maine home. We moved back to Maine when we found out we were expecting, it brought back good memories. He was now working in construction as one of the owners of a rather large company, and I was a teacher. I taught in the reading room at the local elementary school. I loved being able to bring children joy.

"We don't have to leave yet, I'll let you know." I smiled at him, grabbing his hand as a contraction tightened my stomach uncomfortably.

He let out a pained sigh and I released. "Sorry!" I told him.

He still wasn't used to feeling as much as I was.

"It's fine." He said.

Patch was usually talkative, goofy, and fun, but today he was extremely quiet.

"Is everything okay?" He picked my legs up and put them on his lap. We were sitting side by side on the couch and this was our normal position. We were so used to doing anything to get closer to each other.

"I'm just nervous." He repeated.

"Oh baby, there's no need to be. You're going to make a great father. I, for one, can't wait for him to get out of here." I pointed to my engorged stomach.

Pregnancy may have made some women glow, but I felt bloated, sore, and hefty.

Patch, who was accustomed to my train of thoughts by now, gave my thigh a pinch. "You're beautiful, don't you ever think differently."

"What am I supposed to do while we wait?" I whined. I had left my job a few weeks ago for maternity leave and decided to stay at home with the baby until he was ready to go to school. But I still wasn't comfortable with boredom.

My parents visited on and off for the past weeks and it was hard getting used to their presence. Patch helped me through though, as he always did.

"Well, the class we took said it would be good if you took a shower while you're in labor. Or we can go for a walk. But I don't think we should do anything too strenuous."

"I'll take a shower, I guess." I told him slowly getting up.

He twirled me around to face him and I giggled.

"I'll see you soon." He told my belly and kissed it. "I'd ask to join you but…"

"But not for another six weeks." I interrupted him with a wink.

It had been so long since we were intimate and it was killing us both slowly. We were also lacking sleep, I had to get up several times a night to empty my bladder and Patch was a very light sleeper. Needless to say, we were a bit on edge.

"I'll miss you." I blew him a kiss and waddled to the bathroom.

I took a nice, long shower and thought about Patch and the little one on the way. I had no clue how Patch could still find me attractive, I had gained so much weight and it looked like I was smuggling a watermelon under my shirt. But he did.

Unfortunately for me, Patch still looked like an angel, or a Greek God. Only his muscles were bigger and his hair was cut a little shorter now.

When I got out of the shower I was interrupted by a painful tightening.

_Breathe, breathe, breathe_. I told myself.

I must've made some noise because Patch was by my side in a minute.

"Are you okay, Lex?"

"Fine." I managed as the contraction came to an end.

"Whoo, they're getting strong now." I smiled. "Won't be long."

Patch gave me the fakest smile I had ever seen.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Lexi…"

"Patch?" I was getting concerned. He couldn't leave me now that the baby was coming, could he?

"Lexi, I just don't think I deserve this." He stated simply.

"What are you talking about? What did I do?" My breathing became hectic so I sank to the floor.

"Shhh…Stop. I meant I don't deserve this, as in I don't deserve to have this baby with you. I tried to…I almost… You could be dead now because of me." He pulled at his hair and tears pierced his eyes.

I looked up at him, there was no way he was still beating himself up about that.

"Patch Cipriano, you shut up right now." He opened his mouth to speak again. "No, I mean it, shut up. You are not the person you were back then. Okay? We're different now. I love you, you love me, and we're having this baby goddammit."

In the years after we married I started to defend myself more and more, though I'd never yelled at Patch to such an extent before.

"You are going to drive me to the hospital, we are going to have this baby, and then, you are going to be a fantastic father." I stopped talking as another wave of pain hit me. Patch fell to the floor and took my hand.

"Squeeze." He said with a new confidence, and I did.

I looked up at him with obvious pain in my eyes, and he kissed me lightly on the forehead.

We stayed on the bathroom floor until it finished.

"I'm going to get you your hospital clothes. Do you think you can change while I put your suitcases in the car?"

I nodded.

He ran to the bedroom and grabbed the outfit I had picked several weeks ago. It was a black maternity dress made out of cotton, and the comfiest thing I owned.

I heard him close the car door when I threw the dress over my head.

"Another!" I yelled, letting him know the pain was back. He ran to my side again and grabbed my hand. The pain was getting more intense so I knew it was time.

"It's been four minutes." He told me, glancing at his watch.

"You were timing it?" I asked with wide eyes. He nodded.

"I love you!" I kissed his hand that was now as pale as flour.

"When this is over, you'll have to get in the car, you'll probably have a few contractions on the way, but you can do this."

I nodded. If I wasn't in so much pain, I would've kissed him and shown him my gratitude for his calmness.

We hopped in the car and he was right, I had about four contractions before we arrived at the hospital.

We flew to the triage unit where they made me remove my clothes and put a hospital gown on. I could hear Patch's foot tapping nervously while he waited outside of the bathroom.

When I came out, they checked my cervix. It was time.

I sat down in a wheel chair and was wheeled to the labor and delivery floor where a nice nurse named Jackie fixed up my new room.

"Do you want an epidural?" She asked, handing me paperwork to fill out.

"Yes." I told her.

Patch filled out the papers for me as my contractions were coming faster. I let Nurse Jackie know and she checked me again.

"Oh my." She said.

"What does that mean?" I asked nervously as I clung to Patch's arm.

"You seem to be dilating at a faster than the normal rate. I don't think we'll have time for the epidural."

"Patch." I squeaked. I was visibly scared.

"Look at me Lexi," He commanded, and I did. "You are going to be fine. I love you so much, you are a strong, beautiful woman and if anyone can have this baby without needing drugs, it's you. Think of all we've been through, this is nothing compared to that."

I agreed with him to an extent because he sure wasn't feeling what I was feeling, but I nodded anyways.

"I love you." I whispered and he kissed me softly on the lips. We had been together for seven years and he still gave me butterflies.

"I'm going to call the other nurses and get them in here." The nurse told me.

"Why?" I asked her.

"Your water just broke." I looked over my belly and sure enough, a puddle was underneath me.

"Lay down." She told me, and I did.

I was hooked up to a machine to keep track of the baby's heartbeat and my contractions, she was right, it seemed like the baby was coming sooner than we thought.

Every time a contraction came, I looked at Patch and he'd tell me a story from his early fallen angel days, or he'd sing me a soothing lullaby.

About a half hour and two cervix checks later, it was time to push.

The doctor came in the room and introduced him to us. Apparently my doctor had called in sick.

Patch questioned him about his credentials like the overprotective husband he was, and became satisfied with the answers.

Doctor Green looked at me and he asked if I was ready.

"I think so?"

He laughed and I lifted my legs up, ready to push.

After that everything was hazy, pushing hurt but it was a good, accomplished kind of hurt.

Patch held my hand tighter than I held his, and I knew he was concerned for both the baby and me.

Then, we heard it. The sound of a baby crying. Our baby.

I was out of breath and felt weak when the doctor asked Patch to cut the umbilical cord.

But when he handed me the little munchkin, my heart grew two sizes.

He was so tiny, almost seven pounds, with dark black hair that covered his head. The nurses cooed at how adorable he was and Patch remained silent. We both were fighting back tears of joy.

"Maybe the father would like to hold him, eh?" Doctor Green smiled.

I laughed a little and handed him to Patch.

Patch's hands wrapped protectively around the little one, immediately forming a bond with him and he whispered so softly that only I could make out what he said. "Jev. My son."

The nurses asked for the baby to wash him off, and Patch corrected them. "You may have _Jev_." He told them, handing over the newborn.

"Oh, what a lovely name!" Nurse Jackie squealed. Doctor Green told me he'd stop in later, that he wanted to give us some time alone.

As the nurses washed our baby boy, I turned to Patch.

"Wow." He whispered.

"I know."

"He's our little miracle."

I started to silently cry at Patch's words, he was right. After all we had been through; it was a miracle to have such a gift.

"I love you." I said softly. He looked me in the eye and said it back.

He leaned in to whisper what I thought was something sweet, I was mistaken.

"Six weeks and counting." I could feel his grin on my ear. "If we can wait that long."

My Patch was back.


End file.
